I just Farted and its Smells like...Describe your Farts

[MinionZombie]

Thats when you know a fart is going to be fucking vile, when you get that hot waft with it, those ones could peel wallpaper & they tend to linger as well, proper air biscuits! Your normally in two minds as to whether you should go & wipe after one of them too So true. Happened to me last night ... one time I did have to check, just to make doubly sure I didn't need to wipe afterwards. Speaking of farts, I remember back at uni one of my housemates was always ripping horrific guffs into his computer chair (textile, not leather seat cover) and it was ... *gags* ... really bad. He spent a day, after a few years of having this chair, just spraying it constantly with Febreeze. Good god it was bad. lol

[Gabe_dead]

I just ripped a Barking Spider in the shower, its smelled like Macaroni Cheese with a touch of Axe Chocolate Shampoo ...My eyes turned red

[LouCipherr]

I just ripped a Barking Spider My wife calls them something similar sometimes.. "Hey, did you hear that Rocky Mountain Barking Wolf Spider?" one time I did have to check, just to make doubly sure I didn't need to wipe afterwards That moves out of FART territory and into SHART territory, MZ!

[MinionZombie]

Calling your farts any variety of mythical "spider" is news to me. WTF is that all about? Lou - fortunately it was still a fart, and not a shart ... ... although one time, actually no, two times in my life I have sharted.

[acealive1]

i have farts sometimes that smell so bad that once at work i let one go and didnt say anything and the guy next to me said it could peel the color paint off anything. others have said throw up. and other times it smells like a refinery

[Legion2213]

And just when everyone thought it wasn't possible....HPotD has reached a new low. I have learned to have faith in this place and it's cracked denizens. There are NO LIMITS as to just how deep we can dig into the mire of unpleasant things that should not be discussed on civilised forums! Oh, sharting, thats fucking horrible...the hot wet sensation of humiliation!

[BillyRay]

I_farted_sticker.jpg how's this...timely enough for y'all?

[Gabe_dead]

Farts --- Barking Spiders, Stepping on a Dead Ducks Stomach, Fire Water, Hot Bomber, Swamp Water, S.B.D Silent But Deadly, Air Bisicuts, Dutch Oven, Sweetish Bakery.... ---------- Post added at 02:30 PM ---------- Previous post was at 02:28 PM ---------- oh yea Sharting like legion Said, half shit half fart, Hershey Squirts... ---------- Post added at 02:31 PM ---------- Previous post was at 02:30 PM ---------- one thing I did notice about when I fart, is if you check out your boxers after some time, youll notice and almost beige bleach spot around were the fart comes out almost as if the fart is asking like a Tie Die....lmfao ---------- Post added at 06:51 PM ---------- Previous post was at 02:31 PM ---------- just let one out in my hallway smelled like old aligator skin with burning break pads... my mom called me a filthy pig. lol

[SymphonicX]

This thread has made me proper chuckle today!!! Once a few years back I'd been eating nothing but crap for a couple of days - on this particular day, on weekend, I was training a new guy on the job who was looking to join the company as a freelancer...Halfway through the training I needed to fart SO badly, it was like when you puff your cheeks out full of air ready to make a really loud raspberry at someone...So I let as much out as I dared to - there was a slow release capability that day so I chuffed out little bits of it one by one hoping that no one would notice.... Bad idea! The fart was so warm the back of my legs felt the hair shift with the tempature - I decided then and there that this was NOT the sort of fart that could be left unnoticed. I left the room and went to the loo where I unloaded an explosive amount of shit into the toilet and one of the worst smells I could ever imagine. When I went back into the room, the guy I was training was standing outside crying....I shit you not, tears were coming down that motherfucker's face. He wiped them away and managed one sentence before lapsing back into hilarity: "You really dropped a fucking bomb in there mate"....I went back into the room (and this must have been five or ten minutes later by now) and the smell was just fucking unbelievable. I left the room with tears in my eyes and laughing so hard I couldn't speak... funnily enough that guy never came back and we never finished the training!

[Gabe_dead]

Thats and Epic fart, I call those "Whistleing Petes" when it sounds like a mini bullet train coming down the tracks... and then when the fart is almost over it lets out a gust of hot air... lmao

[Ghost Of War]

My farts are LOUD. They don't smell that bad that often, they just go on for a while and make a noise. My wife's brother, on the other hand, can clear a packed room. We were playing football a while back (11 a-side), and he let one rip. I'm not kidding, everyone on the pitch (it was indoor) was heaving, it smelt like a family of otters had been dead in his colon for a month. My daughter is 5 years old and she rips little German V-1 and V-2 rockets, and the funny shit is, I know she farted because I could see her face with a big smile and we just got Dutch Oven-ed in my Lexus... they smell like old sox with garlic and Animal Crackers....lmfao.... My daughter is 6, she's always farting, and she thinks it's hilarious. Proper raspers.

[Tricky]

I notice this thread hasnt gone down well with a few members in another thread, however being a fan of childish, inappropriate toilet humour, I think its hilarious, carry on

[BillyRay]

[LouCipherr]

Hey, I just farted, and guess what? It smelled like the elections yesterday here in the US. In other words, it stank, and really bad. Awww shit, did I just say that out loud?

[Legion2213]

I notice this thread hasnt gone down well with a few members in another thread, however being a fan of childish, inappropriate toilet humour, I think its hilarious, carry on Threads like this are what keep me coming back to this place...we all need some silliness in our lives.