Worst relationship/dating stories?

[JDFP]

You know, as I've been reading all these multiple posts about women doing absolutely cruel and heartless things to guys it's really made me realize (and feel a little better) about knowing that I'm certainly not the only guy who has had to deal with a psycho. I worked with this girl, who we shall refer to as Satan from this point forward, and the first time I saw her thought she was absolutely beautiful and wanted to get to know her better. Fighting all my nerves I ended up talking to her and got her number. Later on that evening I ended up giving her a call and we ended up talking like an hour (to me this was like an eternity as I'm not a "phone talking person"). We decided we were going to go out and hang out and go from there. To say the least, I was on cloud # 9 with excitement. We end up hanging out and it's amazing. When she comes back to the apartment we end up kissing and go, ahem, from there. I would say that it's bad taste to sleep with a girl on the first date (and says something about her if she's willing to put out on the first date as well) but she's extremely attractive and I was certainly not thinking with the correct 'noggin. Anyway, we become very close and start going out / spending time regularly. After awhile she all but ends up moving into my apartment with me (she has clothes there with her own drawer for them, hair-dryer, hair-straightener, shampoo, etc.) and stays at least 3 or 4 nights a week. It's fantastic... and I'm head over heels and not thinking logically. Anyway, S. has two children from her previous marriage (they were divorced only a few months before I started dating her) and she's only 22 when should have been a red flag for me. At the same time, her ex is all the time trying to call her on her phone which just royally ticks me off. I should have known something was up, but, again, I wasn't thinking correctly. When we are in the midst of this type of "experience" we usually don't. About two months after we start dating I ask her to marry me. Yeah, stupid. I know this now but you have to understand I was spending almost every day with this girl and I was completely enticed with her. I really loved her and still do to this day (even after all she's put me through). All my friends were attempting to explain to me that I needed to get away from her and stay away from her, but I just wouldn't listen. Ultimately, I find out (through different ways) that she has been spending the nights that she wasn't around me with her ex who knows nothing about me and sleeping with him. At the same time, while she was separated from her ex she was shacking/screwing this other guy on the side and met with him from time to time for that purpose. To say I was upset is an understatement. We end up hanging out soon after this and I confront her with this information and I'm furious with her. It's pretty heated (non-physical of course as I don't believe in hitting women unless it's an extreme defensive posture to protect yourself with no other options). Well, apparently, she ends up calling up her dad while I'm in the other room who comes over to my apartment and he basically grabs a knife and sticks it against my throat while I'm against my kitchen counter -- meanwhile she's grabbing all her stuff and leaving. He keeps saying: "I should cut your throat for treating my daughter like this!" and what not (to which I should have responded: "And how should your daughter be treated for being a whore?"). My response to him, because I was beyond rage and scared at the same time -- anger and fear make a very strange and messed up combination -- and end up looking at him and basically say: "Do it" while I look right in his eyes. Well, apparently this was enough to frighten him a little and he backs off of me and goes into this whole spiel of "you stay away or blah blah blah...". Anyway, that evening I'm an absolute mess of a person and I end up deciding it would be a good idea to down a fifth of Jack with a bottle of sleeping pills. It seems like a great idea at the time as I've just had my heart beyond broken and I'm just generally feeling devestated. Looking back on it, it's not that I INTENTIONALLY attempted to kill myself so much as it was a matter of I just wanted to sleep and sleep and forget about everything -- basically to escape -- do you understand what I mean? I ended up being lucky and waking up in a complete hallucinatory haze the next morning and my neighbor (realizing I'm pretty damned messed up) calls an ambulance for me. I spend a week in the hospital and do a tremendous amount of soul searching -- finally deciding that I need to get out of town and away from everything/everyone I've ever known for awhile. Sometimes it's just good to get away from everything and have a new start. This is when I moved to Atlanta where I lived for about a year. I honestly think that if I hadn't gotten away from her/here and some other bad people/mojo I was around I probably wouldn't be around right now. I was very messed up there for awhile (to say the least) to an extent that my bartender at my bar was telling me that I had to get out of town or she was afraid she was going to lose me and my business for good (as in me being dead). So, I spend away from my home and I get my shit together. Not having to deal with her bi-polar manic depressive behavior was certainly a huge improvement for a change. It's basically a a sabbatical from life and family/friends and everything else that I took and it was extremely challenging (truly being away from everyone in an unknown city to me and away from all family/friends) and rewarding at the same time. learned a great deal about myself that year (2007) away from everything. When I move back home (after about a year) she comes visit me at my work and (like a complete dumbass, but at least I'm not alone like those of you above me) I end up talking to her and she profusely apologizes for everything and says that she really missed me and wants to spend time with me. So, we decide to start hanging out again (which means lots of sex because we're both extremely physical people) and spending time with each other. Ultimately though, realizing that I can't put myself through what all I've done in the past and had to go through with her since then, I realized that I just had to break it off -- plus, I just didn't trust her and seriously doubt I ever will trust her again. She has since then (2008) gotten herself pregnant again and now has 3 kids at the age of around 24. To say that I'm happy to not have to be in THAT situation is an understatement. In a way I guess you could say there is no other girl I have loved as much or hated as much in my entire life (does this make sense)? But the time with her has been a valuable learning experience to me. Anyway, before I ramble on too much... after Stef I've pretty much been single except a girl I went out with for a few months back around Sept of 2008. I just haven't honestly been interested in dating or having a relationship. I guess at 29 and having been through so much of that I've just become content to spend my time to myself and not worry about any of the rest of it. No mind games / 'other peoples luggage/issues' for me. Sometimes I think it would be nice to have someone around, but usually this feeling passes pretty quickly when I think back on the majority of the time spent with Stef and the issues with the relationship. j.p.

[paulannett]

I've been fairly lucky by the sounds of it, sure I've had a few let downs, but mostly I've been with great fun girls. I think it's because I have my head screwed on and know that I don't need a woman in my life to make me happy, I enjoy FULLY being single and doing what I want, when I want to. However, when I choose (have chosen) to make a girl a part of my life she's an addition to my happiness, not the be all and end all. This is where a lot you seem to go wrong, you get a girl, fall madly in love (in a short time), make her your world which is why you crash and burn so badly when she rips out your still beating heart like a stoned, hallucinating MMA fighter! To me it sounds like a lot of you have issues prior to the relationships and when it all falls down (again and again) you don't know how to handle it and fall into the same self-harming routine (dating another pyscho!). PS: You're all women haters!!!

[Wyldwraith]

Well, I learned a lot from the disasters of an emotional nature I entangled myself in over the years. One of the most important lessons being: "It's a Sociopaths World, and we're just living in it." For me though, I guess things were made pretty simple since. My health is so screwed, and my medical options so limited, that I have (realistically) a 0% chance that I will EVER improve enough to even be able to sit at the PC right here in my own home enough days in a row, for enough time each day to secure some sort of half-assed correspondance-based degree. LET ALONE go back to college, or get healthy enough to even leave the house to work an indoor desk-job. When faced with such realities, you pretty much have to just find ways to convince yourself to keep enduring one more day, and talk yourself out of suicide 14-28x/week. It's sad, but I consider it a major victory I've managed to talk myself into continuing to live/exist pointlessly, and am still marking time until some more natural means of death claims me of its own volition. How sad is that? That my "victory" is marked by at its best, simply surviving to watch the clock go all the way round twice a day, 14x/week...useless to myself and all around me for all but the most trivial of tasks. In hindsight, the period of my life where I was still healthy enough to even be GETTING THRASHED emotionally by these 2 psycho females is STILL the friggin high point. Now that...THAT'S PATHETIC. Count yourselves blessed Lords and Ladies. There are plenty of Hells right here in suburbia USA, and tens of thousands of us occupy them. Even forgetting for a moment the far larger Hells of the undeveloped nations. If you've secured a life-situation that isn't unbearably painful in one way or another every moment of every day, then you've really ended up worlds better off than you might think. Because at the end of it all, constant agony...be it physical, psychological or emotional, whose means of relief is impossible to achieve for the victim, can and will devour each and every single worthwhile element of such a "life." To give you an idea: My mom loves me tremendously. We have and always have had a truly great mother/son relationship. She's been an excellent friend since I was at least 17-18 (am 30 now)...and she'd do anything for me. Meaning nothing but good for me, she's often said that had she been able to see the future, she would have been kind enough not to get pregnant in her entire life, or to abort any pregnancies should she make the mistakes she actually did make when younger. The sad part? It's one of the most loving, most considerate things anyone has ever said to me. I know that me and my brother are my Mom's LIFE, but she curses constantly that she's too "weak" to put me out of my misery... ::shakes head:: Don't know what Hell is until you've had to comfort your mother while she's hysterically beating herself up emotionally that she's cursed you to such a horrible life, and that she's too "selfish" to put my feelings first and show me the decency any moral person would a dog in my condition.

[JDFP]

Well, I learned a lot from the disasters of an emotional nature I entangled myself in over the years. One of the most important lessons being: "It's a Sociopaths World, and we're just living in it." For me though, I guess things were made pretty simple since. My health is so screwed, and my medical options so limited, that I have (realistically) a 0% chance that I will EVER improve enough to even be able to sit at the PC right here in my own home enough days in a row, for enough time each day to secure some sort of half-assed correspondance-based degree. LET ALONE go back to college, or get healthy enough to even leave the house to work an indoor desk-job. When faced with such realities, you pretty much have to just find ways to convince yourself to keep enduring one more day, and talk yourself out of suicide 14-28x/week. It's sad, but I consider it a major victory I've managed to talk myself into continuing to live/exist pointlessly, and am still marking time until some more natural means of death claims me of its own volition. How sad is that? That my "victory" is marked by at its best, simply surviving to watch the clock go all the way round twice a day, 14x/week...useless to myself and all around me for all but the most trivial of tasks. In hindsight, the period of my life where I was still healthy enough to even be GETTING THRASHED emotionally by these 2 psycho females is STILL the friggin high point. Now that...THAT'S PATHETIC. Count yourselves blessed Lords and Ladies. There are plenty of Hells right here in suburbia USA, and tens of thousands of us occupy them. Even forgetting for a moment the far larger Hells of the undeveloped nations. If you've secured a life-situation that isn't unbearably painful in one way or another every moment of every day, then you've really ended up worlds better off than you might think. Because at the end of it all, constant agony...be it physical, psychological or emotional, whose means of relief is impossible to achieve for the victim, can and will devour each and every single worthwhile element of such a "life." To give you an idea: My mom loves me tremendously. We have and always have had a truly great mother/son relationship. She's been an excellent friend since I was at least 17-18 (am 30 now)...and she'd do anything for me. Meaning nothing but good for me, she's often said that had she been able to see the future, she would have been kind enough not to get pregnant in her entire life, or to abort any pregnancies should she make the mistakes she actually did make when younger. The sad part? It's one of the most loving, most considerate things anyone has ever said to me. I know that me and my brother are my Mom's LIFE, but she curses constantly that she's too "weak" to put me out of my misery... ::shakes head:: Don't know what Hell is until you've had to comfort your mother while she's hysterically beating herself up emotionally that she's cursed you to such a horrible life, and that she's too "selfish" to put my feelings first and show me the decency any moral person would a dog in my condition. Hey Wyld, I just read your post and I couldn't help but respond just to let you know how much I and, no doubt, other people here appreciate having you around and how we all definitely appreciate having your intelligent, thoughtful, and in-depth feedback on all the different subjects we discuss here. You are valued here by me and by others and we would all lose by not having you here to contribute with us. I know it seems silly ultimately (Oh, I'm appreciated on a message forum), but its truly meant from me and you are appreciated. Take from that what you will. I would never attempt to belittle you or any others that are in extreme physical/emotional distress by saying something like: "Oh, look on the bright side!". I had my "bad moment" in life a few years ago and unless you're there as a person no one else talking to you can get through to you or attempt to understand your situation. Since my "bad moment" my entire focus on life has completely changed. I just want you to know you're appreciated here and the forum is better for having your insight. Do know that you're not alone though as, thanks to the internet, there are always people/music/etc. a click of a mouse and a keyboard away. You can reach out and communicate with people at any time of day with the 'net, and that's a lot more than any people prior to our generation have had available to them. j.p.

[Wyldwraith]

@JDFP: Thank you my friend. Your words, and the obviously sincere sentiment behind them DO mean a great deal to me. It DOES matter, and to some extent cheers me that some here find the discussions the better for my having contributed (from time to time, I wouldn't be so arrogant as to presume everything I post is worthwhile/valuable). You make an excellent point about the Internet, and touched on the truth of what gives me the energy (not hope, for that implies belief that circumstances may improve), but a sort of empowered resolve to continue for some time more. I'm not so far gone that I can't appreciate honest concern and a desire to demonstrate empathy for my unenviable position, and so I thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to reach out as you did. It matters, a lot. Of late I've begun to believe that since hope is denied me, I would be wiser to turn to my faith, and marshal what energy/determination I have left to continue defending my inner self from the poisonous, insidious cynicism that accompanies the hopelessness. It seems to seek to contaminate even my ability to appreciate simple human contact, a good conversation, reading a good book, or any of the other few things still available to me that give me pleasure, enjoyment and some satisfaction. Sometimes it feels like whatever attrition/entropy has seized hold of my physical self is a malignant semi-awareness all its own. One that won't be content until its stolen the positive intangible and/or abstract pleasures that remain, just as its stolen the physical pleasures. I used to be a very touch-centric individual when it came to the woman I was at the time emotionally and physically intimate with. In some ways, I could appreciate something as basic (yet altogether profound, at least to me) as the pleasure of spooning with the woman I loved, that I held in my arms as she slept and I drifted near to sleep myself. So of course one of the very first serious negative developments concerning my health were the near constant, sudden-but-intensely excruciating deep muscle spasms that would seize me every time I tried to lay on my sides in bed. That's one of the more basic examples, but it gives form to the idea and pattern I'm relating, about how each of these physical pleasures were systematically stripped from my life. Perhaps its a TMI sort of confession, but as a man who began his in-depth exploration of physical intimacy at the relatively very late age of 24, I felt it was only natural that, when combined with my tendency to deeply tie romantic emotion to physical passion (in a manner stereotypically more common to the Woman's *alleged* point of view), that I became an enthusiastic believer in expanding sex into extended foreplay, "selfless" giving of pleasure to my partner, and only then moving on to "the main event". Of course, like everyone else there were many times when mood and circumstance made other methods/ambiences the desired goal, but I mention the general outlook to explain/illuminate something. Like every other male, I of course was very sensitive of any health issue which affected my virility, but on top of that more basic/primal discomfort, it damaged me emotionally in ways even I don't presume to imply I understand in any complete ways. When my health problems/pain robbed me more and more often of "being in the mood", there were so many very painful consequences. Not nearly least of which was a devastating albeit mostly false belief that my physical impairments were responsible for why the women I'd loved ceased to respect, care for, and finally even no longer love me. I mention all this because on top of the straightforward struggle to survive in any meaningful way despite my failing health and constantly increasing pain, I'm haunted by complicated hurts that I'm not even sure which portion of which are/were real or just some illusion of my own creation. It's one thing to be besieged physically, and it's another again to be haunted over and by the emotional impacts to myself and others that my failings have hurt in the past, BOTH TOGETHER. I pray most fervently that none here experience one, let alone both these curses.

[Russ7187]

Guess I should post mine. Not going to take the prize, but might as well share. I shall refer to this girl as The Bitch, cause a few chicks play into this. It all started when I was 16 (I'm 24 now). Me and a girl I was friends with most of my life decided to start dating. We go to Kennywood for the school picnic, and have a great time that night. I end up meeting her friend, who is the bitch. At first I didn't really notice her, but her boyfriend at the time who was cool as fuck. Dude was just fun to talk to and be around, and was nuts. Wouldn't think twice of knocking throwing a trash can down the stairwell at school and shit like that. So we started hanging out wit them a lot, going over to the bitches house to watch movies and other activities. Fast forward a few weeks. Me and the girl I'm with break up, mainly cause it was getting to awkward. Our parents grew up together and what not, and my mom and her parents kept butting their noses in. Only my dad was the cool one, who said we're teenagers and it would more than likely burn out. So this is 2003, and we are all starting to get cell phones and what not, and exchange numbers. Now all the sudden the bitch is calling me, telling me this girl gave up a great guy in me and that I really know how to treat women. She kept wanting to hang out with me and bitch about her boyfriend. This is summer now, so she would call me cause her mom worked nights, and she was afraid at night. Now the girl I was dating and me are still cool, and she hooks me up with my ex, who was her best friend. The bitch calls my new gf and tells her how great I am and what not. The Ex (I'll call her that her from here on) is cool with it, but start to get creeped out. After dating for a few years, me and the ex split. Fast forward to 2006. The ex and me are still cool. But right after the break up she starts dating some other guy and they get REAL close REAL quick. I'm hurt. Well a buddy of mine gets back from boot camp and his parents throw a party, so when I go I end up seeing the bitch. We talked all night while everyone else was drinking and what not. She had just broken up with the guy she was with, and was kind of vague on why (this will play a role later). I figured it hurt her to talk about so leave it alone. After the party I don't really think about her till a few days later. She calls and wants to hang out. So she comes out and shoots pool with me and my buddies. She got along with them ok, but not to great. Warning sign I should have taken. Next week I go out with her friends, and wow things had changed. Most we're all wanna be models, party girls and what not. My ex is now starting to get real serious with the other guy, and I start to compare her to the bitch. Now the bitch is good looking, out of my league. Taller with long dark hair, paler skin which fits her nice, and nice eyes. So I start to feel better hanging out with her. Out of the blue she disappears. No where to be found. Never answers her phone. Never online or anything. After two weeks I hear from her. Her and her friend took a trip down south for a bit. Ok cool, whatever. We pick right back up. Things are even better. We go to Pens and Steeler games all the time. Hell strip clubs a few times. By this point we're both 21, so clubbing downtown, which shocks my friends and I am pretty much a huge metal head. But I start to branch out with her, doing different things all weekend. Again she is gone, this time for about 8 months. And b gone I mean gone. One night we were out and the next never heard from her again. We even had plans to hang out the next weekend. This time I'm upset. I start drinking bad, and even try to use a few other substances to help me. My friends and cousins start getting pissed and want to find her to find out why she did this. Then she resurfaces. Says she was working a lot. Not thinking right I buy into it. Things go good for a few weeks, going out to plays, museums and the zoo, things I never did with my ex. Finally I ask her out. Mistake. She FREAKS. She ask me what the hell made me thing she would EVER wanna be with a guy like me? I listen to devil music (Heavy Metal, but I listen to everything. Got hip hop on now). I am into child stuff like zombies (duh), Star Wars and play video games. That at 22 I should be into adult stuff, and she only goes for mature guys. But she doesn't stop at that. See she left the cool boyfriend for another guy, about 13 years older than us. And that's why she was gone for long period of times. His parents have money and spending it to take her around the country. She says she needs mature guys. Guys in their 30's. And that she was leaving the next day to go away with him, and that he was looking to beat my ass. Wrong move to say the last part. My cousins are pretty much feared in our area. They are known for beating the fuck out of anyone who messes with them, and our aunts and uncles are really into protecting family. They we're ready to go find him. But it was put down in time by one of her other friends. 6 months go by. She calls me one day to say she is so sorry, and never meant of it. She just didn't want to hurt me, and thought by making me mad it would hurt less. She ask if we can go out to dinner, and me being stupid, say I will. Things go good and I even go party with her and her boyfriend, who was a nice guy but you could tell why he was with a younger girl. We start to grow apart when suddenly, she asked me to go out and get fucked up with her one night. Now here comes the end. While out we are both pretty much trashed and she is dancing all over me, and her friend even gives me a condom giggling how I will need it. But when we get into the car she BRUST into tears. Her boyfriend keeps leaving her and moved to the other side of the country. She tells me how she doesn't want anyone but him. Finally something in my snapped. The sight of her throwing up, hyperventilating and having panic attack just annoyed me. She came to me, the guy she kept hurting, about her boyfriend who hurt her. When I dropped her off, she looked for a hug and I just kind of brushed her off. She text me the next day to tell me she was ok, but I told her I was busy going out for my buddies birthday. I still hear from her from time to time. Even saw her at the bar the other day. I'll say hi but that's about it. But being 24, you never know what will happen.

[Wyldwraith]

@Russ: Even I know this problem man. You ended up designated a V.E.T by "The Bitch". V.E.T = Vulnerable Emotional Target, aka a Shoulder to Cry On. Guys who find themselves as V.E.Ts inevitably get stung over and over by the psycho antics of the gameplaying female they've gotten mixed with, but never to the point (initially) that they find cause to draw the line and sever contact with her. The core archetype of a V.E.T-guy is that he invariably ends up serving as a surrogate for the guy the gameplayer-female actually wants but can't get, but she does a credible job for some time to conceal this fact from the V.E.T. Girls like this use hope and your being attracted to them as the "hooks" to keep you around and under control. Desiring to become romantically involved with them, you end up unknowingly being the gameplayer's "In Case of Boredom and/or Lack of Other Options, Break Glass"-type guy. As you discovered, this sort of manipulative self-centered she-devil can easily be identified by taking some sort of action to make an actual play for her. Having ceased to be the safe, easily manipulated comfort-toy by (::gasp: expressing the fact that you have emotional needs of your own, this sort of gameplayer generally realizes she jig is up in short order and moves on to perpetuate the cycle using a new V.E.T-victim. If you'd be interested, I actually wrote up a Field Guide-style document which details the common subspecies of Females Destructive to Men. It's a bit tongue-in-cheek, but it does contain my own experiences and those of other male friends who became interested in the project and contributed. Wrote it up like each type of Destructive Female was a species of predator, and a few teenage guys (younger brothers, cousins etc.) have sung our praises when we gave a copy of the Field Guide to them, and it turned out to be extremely useful in helping them extricate themselves from nasty situations with evil members of the Unfair Sex. Hmm, come to think of it I should really clean it up and turn it into a .pdf Edit: For what it's worth. I turned it in as my Midterm Project in Sociology, and despite having a neurotic but attractive cougar of a professor, she actually gave me an A- (a 90) on it. Back in my college days.

[rongravy]

I'm personally proud today to tell everyone I've a week under my belt of not stalking my ex or planning her death or anyone's she knows and cares about. I still wish it, I just don't plan it. That's progress, isn't it?

[JDFP]

If you'd be interested, I actually wrote up a Field Guide-style document which details the common subspecies of Females Destructive to Men. It's a bit tongue-in-cheek, but it does contain my own experiences and those of other male friends who became interested in the project and contributed. Wyld: I am interested -- please e-mail it to me as I'd love to read. Okay, boys and boys -- it looks like it's time to put some "Ladder Theory" into play here. For those of you unfamiliar with the Ladder Theory it's probably some of the most psychologically/sociologically accurate interpretation on men and women and the differences between us when it comes to relationships. It's utterly brilliant. Here's a link: http://www.laddertheory.com/ In summation, the Ladder Theory basically states this: Men's Interest in a Woman are comprised of this: 60% Looks 30% Estimated Chance She'll Put Out Quickly 10% Other Women's Interest in a Man are comprised of this: 50% Money/Power 40% Attraction 10% Things Women Say They Care About But Really Don't (this includes intelligence, sense of humor, honesty, sensitivity etc.) Basically you take these core principles and Men and Women place these individuals onto a ladder -- men have one ladder and women have two ladder's. The woman has two ladders because there is the "Real" Ladder and the "Friends" Ladder -- an example of a V.E.T. that Wyld discusses would be an individual on the Friend's Ladder, i.e. the ladder of people a girl considers a friend but would never have any real interest in having a relationship with. You can tell you're on this ladder from "Kiss of Death" phrases such as this: 1. You're like my brother I never had, or "You're like my brother." -- the Ultimate Kiss of Death. 2. You're a really good friend. 3. I really appreciate having you around. 4. I wouldn't want to harm our friendship by becoming intimate with you. 5. When I'm around you I can really be myself. -- and similar such things. If you hear any phrases like this, you should pretty much be aware that you're never going to get into the girl's pants (minus copious amounts of alcohol) and it's basically a dead end road full of pain and misery unless all you really want is to be a "good friend" -- which 99.9% of the time you don't because you're a guy. Anyway, you all should check it out, it's amazing and highly honest stuff. j.p.

[kortick]

I was stabbed by an ex girl with one of those big meat forks, u know the ones with the 2 prongs? then later she was telling her friends how much she loved that fork and wanted me to pay to have it bronzed like u do with ur kids first baby shoes. then there was the time a girl pinned me up against the house with her truck and wanted to crush me to death. yeah all in all dating is a great thing.

[Wyldwraith]

Will try to clean up and post some excerpts from the Field Guide here. It ended up in Research Paper format, which isn't the most useful/informative format. Think the Ladder Theory is brilliant, and I agree with its conclusions completely and unreservedly. Gotta rest, back later.

[Russ7187]

Wyld I would definitely be interested in checking that out. If can send it through a PM that'd be easier, if not, I can give you my e-mail address. And your %110 right that I was her VET as you call it. And she has actually found another one recently. I didn't add it to my story because it really doesn't protean to me so I didn't even think to add it. It's just some guy I actually knew years ago who takes her out and buys her things and pays for her way everywhere(Never did I get to that point. I can proudly say that). More power to him, whatever lol. The ladder theory is utter brilliance.

[Wyldwraith]

@Russ: I've gotta reformat the Guide so it'll make sense/be comprehensible when posted on here. I used to have the Guide-version, but all I could find was the finished Research Paper from my Intro to Sociology class. As any of you who've done the college dance know, the stupid formats they require for papers are arcane to the point of being asinine. What you said about this woman having found a new Playtoy is completely consistent with her type. I won't be surprised if she continues this cycle of behavior until her looks start to wilt with age, then my bet would be she'd have a bit of cosmetic surgery, MAYBE go on an exercise regimen for some short-term positive gains in her figure, and then target a financially comfortable single or widowed father whose kids are only a couple years from going off to college, and then get her hooks into this newest target by "accidentally" getting knocked up to "seal the deal." It's a sad, disgusting fact, but at least 70-75% of women are among the classic examples of the worst aspects depicted by Ladder Theory. It always amazes me how the majority of men being considered shallow, unintelligent, poorly groomed and interested in nothing but casual, emotionless sex is deemed "normal" by women, and that we men have no right to be angry or offended when this kind of thoughtless remark is made to our faces, but when a men comments on how women are generally looking to be involved with upper class/wealthy men, and to marry a man with money...or how they "keep a guy on the back burner" (a guy they know wants to be with them, but that they have no real interest in except as someone who can do/buy for her, or be there in a pinch if she's lonely and has no better option available), women go BALLISTIC on us. I always tell women that if you want to object to being the target of generalities then you need to be willing to abandon USING generalities. Speaking just for myself, I'm tired of living in a society where it's completely ok for women to consider us men all shallow dawgs out for nothing but a booty call, and DAMNED TIRED that they can have the gall to get furious when we tag them back with the applicable generalities that describe the scum of their gender.

[Russ7187]

@Russ: I've gotta reformat the Guide so it'll make sense/be comprehensible when posted on here. I used to have the Guide-version, but all I could find was the finished Research Paper from my Intro to Sociology class. As any of you who've done the college dance know, the stupid formats they require for papers are arcane to the point of being asinine. What you said about this woman having found a new Playtoy is completely consistent with her type. I won't be surprised if she continues this cycle of behavior until her looks start to wilt with age, then my bet would be she'd have a bit of cosmetic surgery, MAYBE go on an exercise regimen for some short-term positive gains in her figure, and then target a financially comfortable single or widowed father whose kids are only a couple years from going off to college, and then get her hooks into this newest target by "accidentally" getting knocked up to "seal the deal." It's a sad, disgusting fact, but at least 70-75% of women are among the classic examples of the worst aspects depicted by Ladder Theory. It always amazes me how the majority of men being considered shallow, unintelligent, poorly groomed and interested in nothing but casual, emotionless sex is deemed "normal" by women, and that we men have no right to be angry or offended when this kind of thoughtless remark is made to our faces, but when a men comments on how women are generally looking to be involved with upper class/wealthy men, and to marry a man with money...or how they "keep a guy on the back burner" (a guy they know wants to be with them, but that they have no real interest in except as someone who can do/buy for her, or be there in a pinch if she's lonely and has no better option available), women go BALLISTIC on us. I always tell women that if you want to object to being the target of generalities then you need to be willing to abandon USING generalities. Speaking just for myself, I'm tired of living in a society where it's completely ok for women to consider us men all shallow dawgs out for nothing but a booty call, and DAMNED TIRED that they can have the gall to get furious when we tag them back with the applicable generalities that describe the scum of their gender. Everything you said there is to a T about her. Right now with her new lacky there is a huge story involving my best friend and his girl friend. I actually just got a text about it a few minutes ago, but I try to stay out of it. Hard thing is, and I will admit this, I feel somewhat jealous that my best friend and this other guy still have contact with her, and I don't. Sometimes I have my days where I just wanna break down, find her on facebook and just write down that I miss her (corny I know). But usually having a good night out with my buddies will keep me from going over the edge. Hell my friends and family are the only things to lean on. And I'm sure everyone else can say the same.

[JDFP]

Hard thing is, and I will admit this, I feel somewhat jealous that my best friend and this other guy still have contact with her, and I don't. Sometimes I have my days where I just wanna break down, find her on facebook and just write down that I miss her (corny I know). But usually having a good night out with my buddies will keep me from going over the edge. Hell my friends and family are the only things to lean on. And I'm sure everyone else can say the same. Hang in there, my friend. I certainly understand and know where you're coming from as a person. I think a major issue with society is that from infancy we are brought up with the notion that men and women are "supposed" to get married and have children. As if being a single person after a certain age is a black mark against you for some reason. You're not truly a "full member of society" unless you're married with 2.3 children and a dog named Fluffy. It's ingrained in society for some reason and it's really sickening actually. There's absolutely nothing wrong with being single -- in fact, I'd go so far as to say that being single has far superior advantages than being in a committed relationship or being married. For one, your time is your own. You do not have to "negotiate" how you are going to spend your day or who/how you will spend your day. As others have mentioned here, many of us have lost good friends who have gone into a committed relationship/become married never to hear from them again as if they disappeared off the face of the earth. Second, the entire issues of finances. My money I make is my money I make. Period. As long as I'm paying my bills (rent/home payments/car payments/utilities/etc.) I shouldn't have to explain myself if I went to spend a thousand dollars on a new big screen. Wyld is right on the money when it comes to the issue of it's perfectly fine for women to dog how a great number of men (I won't say majority) act and yet it's just not acceptable for men to comment on women (I won't say majority) acting in a certain way. If a man cheats on his girlfriend/wife then he should be called out for it and his actions. Likewise, I feel no remorse in calling a woman who acts like a whore exactly that: a whore. People are their actions, regardless of being male or female. Most men and women are pure scum. That's all there is to it. People like to use and abuse you for their own purposes and then be done with you and move onto something else. Personally, I think it's easier and far less difficult in dealing with my own issues/problems then attempting to deal with my problems and the problems of another person. Personally, I just don't need that crap any longer. I've been there and gone through it a few times in previous relationships and I don't see a purpose for it. If you think about it, as far as sex goes, prostitution (whether male or female) is one of the most honest professions out there. You spend $100 plus (depending on the quality of the 'product') and you know exactly what you're going to get for the purchase. If you go on a date with someone, you could spend the same $100 with no guarantees on a return on the investment. At least prostitution is honest. j.p.