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Thread: Bar bans man with frequent flatulence

  1. #1
    Dying Tied2thetracks's Avatar
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    Bar bans man with frequent flatulence

    I know youd rather see me gone,Than to see me the way that I am. But I am in the life anyway.

  2. #2
    capncnut
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    Durty Bastah.

  3. #3
    Inverting The Cross MikePizzoff's Avatar
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    That's the funniest story I've read all day.

  4. #4
    capncnut
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    Raab C. Nesbit anyone?

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    Rising DeadJonas190's Avatar
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    That is hillarious!

    Is it a real story though, it reads like something out of a tabloid.
    Last edited by DeadJonas190; 27-Mar-2007 at 05:38 AM.
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    LOVE IT!

    Nothing like a good fart story ... now I enjoy a fart as much as the next bloke, positively rejoice in it, but I know when and when not to let go a guffty...that bloke was just being a dick ... and look at his picture, lol, geeeeeeez!

    Somehow though, I think breathing in a pubfull of lingering smoke is worse for you, technically, than a cloud of fart-fug hanging around some wonkey-eyed Scotsman...mind you, if it really reeks, you don't want the guy hanging around, cos some farts are foul.

    I've got nothing against the sound of farting, it's the smell that's a problem, fortunately I can fart without stench most of the time, so it's all comic toilet humour ... but I'd better not step foot in that pub after having had a bowl of raisins, ho-no!

    Nothing like some toilet humour to start the day...

  7. #7
    pissing in your Kool-Aid DjfunkmasterG's Avatar
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    If your whole ambition in life is to go to the pub and blast ass just to see how many people it clears out, then you have a serious mental issue. By the looks of the guy in the picture, he doesn't look normal so they at the bar should have expected him to not act normal.
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    certified super rad Danny's Avatar
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  9. #9
    Walking Dead coma's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DjfunkmasterG View Post
    If your whole ambition in life is to go to the pub and blast ass just to see how many people it clears out, then you have a serious mental issue. By the looks of the guy in the picture, he doesn't look normal so they at the bar should have expected him to not act normal.
    If you kicked out all the wierdos, subtards and social retards from any bar you will have no patrons. I Bartended for a while and thats a fact. however, if you bother people you get 86'd

    That farty man is one of those guys who blasts out then stinkys then denies it everytime. In this case I believe the owner. If you have had to tell someone to stop the beefaroni numerous times they are nasty.
    I had a friend in junior high that would take flatulence pills so he could fart all day. He'd say "farting is natural." to which I retorted "Not if you take pills. Do you not like girls or something, jackass"
    Up, Up and Away! ARRRRRGHGGGH

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  10. #10
    Banned HLS's Avatar
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    poor guy!

    That got me thinking of my ex husband. He used to pass gass all the time and it was real rank. I remember he did it once as he was exiting an elevator in a hospital right before a little old lady walked in and you can hear her cussing in the elevator lol

  11. #11
    Dead DVW5150's Avatar
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    " Letting one go ..."

    Hops & Barley cause gas ... onions too . Forget it if he has had chili .
    "Goodbye , I am gone."

  12. #12
    capncnut
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    Heinz baked beans, the worst. Especially curried.

  13. #13
    Banned HLS's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DVW5150 View Post
    Hops & Barley cause gas ... onions too . Forget it if he has had chili .
    What really gives me gas, and I can not believe I am admitting this, is dried apricots. I ate a whole bag once before work and I was farting all day for hours. It was so embarrassing. I had enough gas to power a small city for a day. lol

  14. #14
    Team Rick MinionZombie's Avatar
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    I had a friend in junior high that would take flatulence pills so he could fart all day. He'd say "farting is natural." to which I retorted "Not if you take pills. Do you not like girls or something, jackass"
    FARTING PILLS???!!!

    Smell & Noise, or just one of them at a time?

    Farting is best left to skilled professionals like myself, natural means ... farting pills is like the steroids of the farting game.

    I'm all noise mostly, but can funk out the place with the best of them now and then ... my main skill is belching, I can rift with the best of them.

  15. #15
    Just been bitten Dtothe3's Avatar
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    Belching is my specialty too Although if I start farting people know to avoid the bathroom. Means a big **** is coming

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