Once upon a time there lived a beautiful Queen with extraordinarily
large breasts.
Nick the Dragon Slayer obsessed over the Queen for this reason. He knew
that the penalty for his desire would be death should he try to touch
them, but he had to try. One day Nick revealed his secret desire to his
colleague, Horatio the Physician, the King's chief doctor. Horatio
thought about this and said that he could arrange for Nick to more than
satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1,000 gold coins to arrange
it.
Without pause Nick readily agreed to the scheme.
The next day, Horatio made a batch of itching powder and poured a little
bit into the Queen's bra while she bathed. Soon after she dressed, the
itching commenced and grew intense. Upon being summoned to the Royal
Chambers to address this incident, Horatio informed the King and Queen
that only a special saliva, if applied for four hours, would cure this
type of itch, and that tests had shown that only the saliva of Nick
would work as the antidote to cure the itch.
The King, eager to help his Queen, quickly summoned Nick to their
chambers. Horatio then slipped Nick the antidote for the itching powder,
which he put into his mouth, and for the next four hours, Nick worked
passionately on the Queen's large and magnificent breasts. The Queen's
itching was eventually relieved, and Nick left satisfied and hailed as a
hero. Upon returning to his chamber, Nick found Horatio demanding his
payment of 1,000 gold coins. With his obsession now satisfied, Nick
couldn't have cared less and, knowing that Horatio could never report
this matter to the King, and with a laugh told him to get lost.
The next day, Horatio slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder
into the King's underwear. The King immediately summoned Nick.
The moral of the story? Pay your bills.
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