You wake up and find you're the last person on earth...

[MoonSylver]

See, this right here is why I need to make myself a "Listen to Bassman" t-shirt. Nail on the head. They're on sale now for the low, low price of 29.99. They also come with a WWBMD beanie. As famously seen here:

[White_Zombie]

I'd go to Area 51 and look for signs of extraterrestrials. I'd go to Fort Knox and amass all the gold bars. I'd drive a tank and tear threw neighborhoods for fun, crushing cars and blasting the big guns at houses. I'd paint the white house pink and pimp it out to my specifications. And after i get sick of all of that I'd hit the pharmacies and look for drugs of my desire and continue to get high as hell. I could probably think or more but I'll get back to you, by the way make believe is sure fun as fuck dude.

[SymphonicX]

Sex dolls are just creepy. If you're the last person on Earth, I doubt you would care much for any sort of sexual activity anyway. If you did, whats wrong with good ol masturbation? At least you'll have an unlimited supply of porn. This makes no sense! I remember watching the Omega Man and thinking a similar thing - but with no actual REAL females around, and the knowledge that you're essentially bashing one off about a dead girl, do you think you could manage it? Knowing that ultimately, it'll never get better than the magazine you're looking at - and that person is long dead and all your chances of acting out this fantasy are beyond that of the normal impossibility of shagging a celeb...!? I think I'd probably go crazy at that point. And as for raiding pharmacies etc - well don't forget you'd probably go crazy on your own taking loads of chems without someone else to share the experience with... Insanity would come sooo quickly... so, police evidence lockers, blow some shit up, then off myself before insanity sets in...!

[ProfessorChaos]

i'd have a blast. catch up on some movies, games, books, etc. go on a cross-country road-trip, seeing all the sights i've never seen in the states, drive as fast as i'd like, run stop signs, blow things up, set things on fire, be perma-stoned off prescription pain-killers, etc. i really don't think it'd be all that bad once you got used to it, and hopefully my little dog would be there to provide me with what little companionship i need. oh, and moon, it's great to see you around here man.

[bassman]

As famously seen here: That's the one. Been a best seller since 68... I'd go to Area 51 and look for signs of extraterrestrials. I'd go to Fort Knox and amass all the gold bars. I'd drive a tank and tear threw neighborhoods for fun, crushing cars and blasting the big guns at houses. I'd paint the white house pink and pimp it out to my specifications. And after i get sick of all of that I'd hit the pharmacies and look for drugs of my desire and continue to get high as hell. I could probably think or more but I'll get back to you, by the way make believe is sure fun as fuck dude. Great ideas! Well....except for Knox. They don't hold the gold anymore, do they? This makes no sense! I remember watching the Omega Man and thinking a similar thing - but with no actual REAL females around, and the knowledge that you're essentially bashing one off about a dead girl, do you think you could manage it? Knowing that ultimately, it'll never get better than the magazine you're looking at - and that person is long dead and all your chances of acting out this fantasy are beyond that of the normal impossibility of shagging a celeb...!? Let's be honest.....all of us have unknowingly had a wank to a dead pornstar. It's just a given. It may not make sense to you, but to me it does. I would much rather have a quick release and go about my business than be thrusting a hunk of rubber made to look look like a whore. That's just pathetic dude. Even without anyone else around to find out about it... Here's a funny one to ponder after all our answers - Somehow only HPotD regulars are the ones to survive. Now that would be interesting.

[Trin]

Sex dolls are just creepy. If you're the last person on Earth, I doubt you would care much for any sort of sexual activity anyway. If you did, whats wrong with good ol masturbation? At least you'll have an unlimited supply of porn. I don't see why I'd change what I do when I'm alone just becaues there are no people around.

[JDFP]

Oh good grief, I put up a sociological question as to how being the last person on earth would affect us and my thread degrades down into... yep, you guessed it, masturbation. We all need to get out more often if that's the best thought we can have with the whole world being yours for the picking. j.p.

[rongravy]

...whats wrong with good ol masturbation? At least you'll have an unlimited supply of porn. And no one to come busting in on you when you're busting that nut.

[JDFP]

So, thus far, the results to this question have come down a few things: -- Suicide -- Lots of Traveling -- Copious Amounts of Masturbation -- Pharmacology Indulgence -- Seeking Out Other People As for me... I'd probably be in a daze for a few days thinking: "The hell?" and wondering if I hadn't passed away in my sleep and awoken in some form of Purgatory to test my reaction to such an event. I'd probably become all metaphysical about the entire thing thinking I was dead and it was a test to prove the quality of my soul so I could move onward to a higher plain of existence. I've never been one for traveling much -- just never really cared for travel. Basically everything I need is within 20 miles of my apartment. So, I'd probably spend the first few weeks getting drunk between intermittent sessions of passing out and still asking myself: "The hell?". After awhile I'd pick up a Franklin Covey planner and map out a regular daily routine (getting groceries, writing my thoughts and emotions to keep track of my language and writing abilities in a world where it isn't practiced regularly, etc.). The way I look at it is that if I can have a regular daily routine (as I do now) it will keep me, or at least prolong, the onslaught of schizophrenic tendencies ("Oh, the voices tell me to...") as well as keeping me somewhat in tune with myself and that Yes, Virginia, I still really exist. I think for me, I can't speak for everyone else who has either offed themselves or is getting off on themselves, the biggest issue for me would be to ensure that I'm keeping a regular daily routine so I can stay somewhat sane for when the supernatural entities showed up to inform me I had passed their test. j.p.

[Mr. Clean]

Day 1: Wake up...No one around to be seen....Walk around for awhile....Still no one around to be seen....Find something to eat....walk around some more....find more food....return home...secure house...sleep.... Day 2: Wake Up...find something to eat....find Guns....M24 w/ sling (http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...EO_M24_SWS.jpg), Remington 870 Super Shorty X2 w/ combat quick release chest slings (http://www.serbu.com/legacy/sus3s.jpg) stash LOADS of ammo (7.62, Buckshot, Turkey Load, Slugs) at home....Eat....Sleep.... Day 3 -10: .....Fix up defenses of House (Reinforced Doors...Fill in lower windows....ect) Day 11-30: ....Load up on canned goods...fuel cans...other supplies... Day 31: ...Find pain killers, beer, alcohol, tobacco and relax If I woke up on the 32nd day...I'd probably go find me some sort of animal to kill so I could have a nice meal for the next week or so...Then I don't have a clue...Fix up my house and hoard supplies until I felt comfortable enough in case I had to lock myself in the house for whatever reason...Then I'd be burning everything in sight.

[ProfessorChaos]

I've never been one for traveling much -- just never really cared for travel. Basically everything I need is within 20 miles of my apartment. So, I'd probably spend the first few weeks getting drunk... based on your posts in the past, i doubt there'd be enough beer in a 20-mile radius of your apartment to last you all that long. and what's the deal, get tired of people making fun of your hat?

[JDFP]

based on your posts in the past, i doubt there'd be enough beer in a 20-mile radius of your apartment to last you all that long. and what's the deal, get tired of people making fun of your hat? Listen here, Bickle, if I want to change my avatar, I'll change my avatar. Now, I haven't done it in about 1,000 posts, so I figured, why the hell not? It's time for a change. I'm just turning in one hat for another with my hero Waylon Jennings (just as Bass has with Serling or other folks who change avatars more than post, though I'm fond of Chic's 'Snow' White). Now if you want to cry about my changing of my avatar as a death of a tradition here at HPotD ("But we always knew JD would have this avatar!") I can understand your profound sadness at the loss of my avatar. But, I assure you, Prof, I have faith that you'll manage. Shit, I'll probably grow tired of being Waylon after awhile and change it back to my fedora avatar that everyone has grown so accustomed to as a fixture here. Just because everyone here is so bitterly jealous of my awesomeness doesn't mean I have to indulge them in their fancies. I think I'll dig being Waylon here for awhile. As far as the beer ratio to drinking quota -- I'm only on my 14th or so Beast right now (Milwaukee's Best for the unwashed masses) and I'm feeling just peachy. I think there's enough grocery stores around here with the Beast to last me at least a good 3 weeks in an apocalyptic scenario before I'd have to venture outside of my comfort zone. God forbid there's anything that stand between me and my beer though apocalypse or not. j.p.

[White_Zombie]

Great ideas! Well....except for Knox. They don't hold the gold anymore, do they? No one really knows how much gold or if any gold is still at Fort.Knox, but they sure do have strict security measures at the depository. That tells me something worth while is in there to be guarded.

[blind2d]

I was thinking of changing my avatar, but... come on, it's Chuck from PSG as Noodle from Gorillaz (phase one). How could you improve on that?! Oh yeah, beer. I'd totally drink some of that in the event of the Greatest Day Ever (aka, everyone-on-the-planet-dies-except-me day). I suck...

[Danny]

i am shocked on a mostly american board that i am the only person thinking of having a totally rad barbecue before all that meat goes bad.