Zombie Toolss:accessories for the apocalypse

[Thorn]

http://zombietools.net/

http://www.geekologie.com/2008/10/17/zombie-tools-1.jpg

[Philly_SWAT]

http://zombietools.net/

http://www.geekologie.com/2008/10/17/zombie-tools-1.jpg

I have to wonder Thorn, is this just a site that you found on the web, or is it a site that you created on the web? :D

[darth los]

:lol::lol:


It does look and sound like something that he'd come up with. It's not a knock on him or anything, just true. I think the stuff he comes up with is awesome.



:cool:

[Philly_SWAT]

:lol::lol:


It does look and sound like something that he'd come up with. It's not a knock on him or anything, just true. I think the stuff he comes up with is awesome.



:cool:

Indeed he does come up with awesome stuff. I did not intend my comment as a knock at all. A zombie outbreak is for sure highly unlikely. Some other more realistic the ****-hits-the-fan scenario is a lot more likely, and if that happens, Thorn will have a much better chance of survival than the average Joe.

[Cody]

It does look like he created it just because the site looks familiar to the sigs hes been making everyone. busted ;)

[darth los]

It does look like he created it just because the site looks familiar to the sigs hes been making everyone. busted ;)

Those sigs were a dead giveaway huh? lol

We ain't mad at cha dude.


:cool:

[EvilNed]

I like these guys. They modelled their machete like a falcata, which, as I've claimed all along, is the best zombie chopping weapon!

[Thorn]

I am INNOCENT!

Thanks for the good words though, seriously appreciated on all counts. If the zed hits the fan we should all band together, I give us 100% chance of kicking stencher tail.

;)

[SRP76]

Always with the hacking implements. They won't get the job done.

What we need is some version of hedgeclippers, with long handles...simply cut heads off with scissor action. Remember those beheading shears in Exorcist III? Those. Get some.

[AcesandEights]

Always with the hacking implements. They won't get the job done.


I so agree with the above statement, hacking implements will be prone to breaking, but are very effective short term (aside from a likelyhood of getting stuck in the objects they hack and slowing things down a bit). I was with you till you got to your shears suggestion. I respectfully disagree with the giant hedge clipper idea.

Sincerely,

--Lead pipe

[SRP76]

They're perfect. No swinging, no fatigue, just snip the stems.

Just think, this could be you:

http://www.joblo.com/images_arrownews/halloween07-exorcist3.jpg

SNIP! Job done.:)

[AcesandEights]

They're perfect. No swinging, no fatigue, just snip the stems.

Just think, this could be you:

http://www.joblo.com/images_arrownews/halloween07-exorcist3.jpg

SNIP! Job done.:)

That would make an awesome commercial for a zombie 'Headtrimmer'.

Are you tired of endlessly whacking away at your neighbors zombified heads?

...

Ballistic-mesh Zombie craniotomy bags sold separately!

[clanglee]

Always with the hacking implements. They won't get the job done.

What we need is some version of hedgeclippers, with long handles...simply cut heads off with scissor action. Remember those beheading shears in Exorcist III? Those. Get some.

I hear ya, but those head trimmers require a herculean feat of strength to open. No good for repeated use. Would be fun tho!!

[Bub666]

http://zombietools.net/

http://www.geekologie.com/2008/10/17/zombie-tools-1.jpg

Cool looking site.

[EvilNed]

Always with the hacking implements. They won't get the job done.

What we need is some version of hedgeclippers, with long handles...simply cut heads off with scissor action. Remember those beheading shears in Exorcist III? Those. Get some.

Hey, you might be on to something. Razor sharp shears!

[Philly_SWAT]

Always with the hacking implements. They won't get the job done.

What we need is some version of hedgeclippers, with long handles...simply cut heads off with scissor action. Remember those beheading shears in Exorcist III? Those. Get some.

My problem with hacking implements (or beheading shears...they are expensive at Home Depot :) ) is that they require a lot of physical effort. If you had one or a couple of zeds in front of you, then it would be OK. You could dispatch of them quickly, then be on your way. You cuold sharpen/repair at your leisure. The problem is, if you found yourself surrounded, or just in close quarters with a lot of zeds, you would tire quickly and succomb to the surge of zeds. Quick loading guns with lots of ammo would be the best bet in that situation. If it were difficult/impossible to get more ammo, then you would be screwed if you ever found yourself in close proximity to a horde.

[blind2d]

Hmm... I still say samurai swords are the best decapitators... wakizashi, you know? Especially if they're ancient or sacred... and... possessed by the spirits of great warriors... or made by Ginzu.

[DawnGirl27]

I love to see anything Thorn comes up with - he so could have written a book like Max Brooks did. :thumbsup:
A lot of people here have great ideas/concepts for what to do if a zombie apocalypse occurred, and it's fun to step away from reality and just go with them. This forum is the best there is, due to the creative people who post on it.
*Steps off her soapbox* :cool:

[EvilNed]

Hmm... I still say samurai swords are the best decapitators... wakizashi, you know? Especially if they're ancient or sacred... and... possessed by the spirits of great warriors... or made by Ginzu.

Of course you say that, you've got an anime avatar and you probably think european swords were heavier and duller than samurai swords. Am I right?

Ok, once and for all:

European steel was superior to Japanese steel, thus European swords were tougher and sturdier than Japanese swords. An european hand-and-a-half sword weighed roughly the equal to a Japanese katana, and was equally sharp (razor blade). The only real difference between the swords (apart from the steel they were forged from) is that the european swords were straight and designed for stabbing, and the japanese swords were curved and designed for slashing. But both swords could do either.

[Thorn]

I love to see anything Thorn comes up with - he so could have written a book like Max Brooks did. :thumbsup:
A lot of people here have great ideas/concepts for what to do if a zombie apocalypse occurred, and it's fun to step away from reality and just go with them. This forum is the best there is, due to the creative people who post on it.
*Steps off her soapbox* :cool:

Thank you very much, and I couldn't agree more. Homepage is the best page on the net for all things Romero and Zombie. I was proud to help edit the fiction section for a short while back in the old days, it is great to contribute on any level you know? A community like this is only as good as the people who visit it.

If no one posts it makes for a dull visit ;)

[clanglee]

Of course you say that, you've got an anime avatar and you probably think european swords were heavier and duller than samurai swords. Am I right?

Ok, once and for all:

European steel was superior to Japanese steel, thus European swords were tougher and sturdier than Japanese swords. An european hand-and-a-half sword weighed roughly the equal to a Japanese katana, and was equally sharp (razor blade). The only real difference between the swords (apart from the steel they were forged from) is that the european swords were straight and designed for stabbing, and the japanese swords were curved and designed for slashing. But both swords could do either.

Dude. . .I'm pretty sure he was kinda kidding. Maybe you didn't pick that up from the Ginzu reference. :rolleyes:

[EvilNed]

Dude. . .I'm pretty sure he was kinda kidding. Maybe you didn't pick that up from the Ginzu reference. :rolleyes:

Sorry... Touchy subject... I have an oversensetive wapanese-radar...

[blind2d]

Just a fanboy here, no need to get antsy... geez, sometimes you people are a little hostile...

[darth los]

Just a fanboy here, no need to get antsy... geez, sometimes you people are a little hostile...

Don't mind NED. He'll grow on you after a while. Not something I would have said but i'm sure he didn't mean anything by it. We're all cool here. Mostly. lol



:cool:

[clanglee]

mostly.


http://www.best-horror-movies.com/images/Aliens-newt.jpg

Mostly. . .

[EvilNed]

Just a fanboy here, no need to get antsy... geez, sometimes you people are a little hostile...

Yeah, sorry. Don't worry, I won't put you in a gulag or anything.

Yet...

[Thorn]

Yeah, sorry. Don't worry, I won't put you in a gulag or anything.

Yet...

He turned me in to a NEWT!

http://www.ideagrove.com/blog/uploaded_images/monty_python_witch-701441.jpg

[Yojimbo]

He turned me in to a NEWT!

http://www.ideagrove.com/blog/uploaded_images/monty_python_witch-701441.jpg
Don't sweat it Thorn, you'll get better.


On the subject of machetes, however, I think they are pretty good if you are going to be cutting vegetation, but they were never designed for combat. I still think for a melee weapon you would be best off with the Tactical Tomahawk used by the Special Forces in Vietnam.

http://www.knivesplus.com/cold-steel-tomahawk-cs-90vt.html

Also on the cold steel site is a really cool shovel that is modeled after the Spetsnaz shovel that the Soviet commandos would throw at their victims, or swing to decapitate folks.

http://www.knivesplus.com/CS-92SF-Cold-Steel.HTML

At least with the shovel you can dig a hole and have a nice weapon. But unless you are trained to use a sword, a machete is likely to snag on a bone and snap.

[blind2d]

I am wondering why no one has yet mentioned the Xiaolin Spade so toted as the ultimate anti-zed blade by Max Brooks. Is it fictional?

[EvilNed]

Probably because swords are cooler, and crowbars more useful. So if it ain't as cool, and it ain't as useful, then it's not going to show up in a thread. SOrt off.. :P

[Yojimbo]

Probably because swords are cooler, and crowbars more useful. So if it ain't as cool, and it ain't as useful, then it's not going to show up in a thread. SOrt off.. :P

How likely it is that anyone would find that Shaolin Spade if the SHTF? Like a lot of what Brooks wrote in his admittedly entertaining "survival guide" his advice on weapons contains a lot of silliness. I still think that anyone who thinks taking out a staircase with an axe while standing on it needs to seriously reevaluate.

EDIT: A quick google search turned up only one source, a martial arts supplier, for the shaolin spade, and this version was a hollow, unsharpened practice model which would be completely insufficient for beheading anything in real life. So, unless you can make your own shaolin spade, or are lucky enough to stumble across one out in the field, this weapon- however practical it might be - is likely not to be available to you when the dead start to rise.

[blind2d]

*smacks self in head* should've thought of that, I suppose... aw well, at least I got me my crowbar. Her name's Lucille.

[Yojimbo]

*smacks self in head* should've thought of that, I suppose... aw well, at least I got me my crowbar. Her name's Lucille.


Blind, you'll be better off with Lucille. Add a decent longarm and a sidearm while you are at it if you can. Zombies notwithstanding, in any apocalyptic scenario you are likely to be in more danger from other survivors than from the disaster itself, and a 12 gauge pump shotgun is going to at least keep the looters off your back a lot more efficiently than Brook's Shaolin Spade. And you will always have Lucille for the close up "wet-work" or if you need to open a door or something. :)

[blind2d]

Good point. Hey, you know why I call her Lucille? Go on, take a guess.

[Yojimbo]

Good point. Hey, you know why I call her Lucille? Go on, take a guess.
Maybe because you can't find a shaolin spade to call "Lucille"?:lol:

[blind2d]

:lol: but seriously, it's cause of the character from... nevermind, nobody here would get it. Anyway, what's the difference between a wood and aluminum baseball bat again? I've got one of each, so I want to know which would be more useful if (when) the dead rise.

[Legion2213]

I think a blunt trauma kind of weapon would be best for zombie slaying.

That said, I need one of those "two handed apocalax" puppies. :cool:

I like the "f*ck the revolution" t-shirt as well. :)

[mista_mo]

How about a gun that shoots lead pipes?