Remake Wish List

[SRP76]

Almost everyone hates remakes. I myself hate them.

But, since they are here to stay, we'd all better just bite the pillow and enjoy the dry-boning Hollywood is going to give us.

I tried to find a way to make remakes more palatable. I think I may have found a decent solution.

The "problem" seems to be that everyone wants to make movies that were popular before (in other words, usually good movies), and redo them. Well, you can only fuck things up if you redo something that's already good.

So, how about taking bad movies, and changing them? Since they suck, you can't very well do any harm. You can only improve them. Maybe this would be okay.

In keeping with that theme, what shitty movies do you guys think could be "made better"?

[bassman]

Manos: The Hand of Fate. Except I wouldn't really want it to be a straight-forward horror film. They would have to intentionally throw some humor in to keep the balance of the unintentional humor from the original. And EPIC countryside driving scenes!:lol:

[Mike70]

In keeping with that theme, what shitty movies do you guys think could be "made better"?

1. Dune. the lynch version is a titanic piece of garbage. a remake with the flying monkeys from the wizard of oz playing the fremen would be better than lynch's offering.

2. Battlefield Earth. the less said about this film the better.

3. The Phantom Menace. ditch jar-jar and hire a kid doesn't act like he's a wind up doll.

[SRP76]

Never even heard of that flick (Manos).:(

One that jumped at me from Day One is Waterworld (Kevin Costner and Dennis Hopper flick, it should be pretty well-known).

I thought this movie had a decent premise, and it seemed like it would be good. But then, the very instant I heard "he's got GILLS!", it went straight down the shitter.

I wouldn't mind if they redid that movie, and just had the lead character be a Conan-like badass, rather than a fish-man mutant.

[bassman]

Never even heard of that flick (Manos).:(


Here's a fan made trailer that pretty much gets the point across...

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You can find both the original film and the MST3K version on youtube. I suggest the MST3K for an even better laugh. To a lot of people....this is one of the worst films of all time.

[AcesandEights]

Flash Gordon. Simply because the last big screen adaptation was not gay enough.

http://www.collider.com/uploads/imageGallery/Flash_Gordon/flash_gordon_movie_image__3_.jpg

[SRP76]

That dude looks extraordinarily happy. I guess that's supposed to be a menacing snarl, but it looks more like he just won the lottery or something.

This may sound stupid, but I think a remake of The Muppet Movie could be good. Current celebrities and some updates to some of the muppets (for instance, you wouldn't have a 60s band in 2010).

[BillyRay]

This may sound stupid, but I think a remake of The Muppet Movie could be good. Current celebrities and some updates to some of the muppets .

Not stupid. BLASPHEMOUS, but not stupid.:lol:

But I see where you're coming from in a way. Every time I watch that movie, I look at the celebrity cameos and think "He's dead, he's dead, she's dead, he's not at all well..."

So you may have a point.

[SRP76]

Every time I watch that movie, I look at the celebrity cameos and think "He's dead, he's dead, she's dead, he's not at all well..."


I did the same thing when I re-watched it a few months back. And honestly, I doubt anyone under the age of 30 would even recognize any of them. In fact, every one of the is from before MY time, even! If it weren't for Brewster's Millions, I wouldn't be able to pick Richard Pryor out of a lineup. And I only know of the rest by reputation.

Thing is, (nearly) every celebrity involved with those things was some sort of comedic talent. I honestly can't think of that many comics today; most current entertainment seems to center around drama or showing tits and ass.

Maybe Dave Chappelle, Jerry Seinfeld...possibly Tim Allen?

[bassman]

This may sound stupid, but I think a remake of The Muppet Movie could be good. Current celebrities and some updates to some of the muppets (for instance, you wouldn't have a 60s band in 2010).

In the works as we speak. Jason Siegel of Forgetting Sarah Marshall and I Love You Man fame is working on it. At the moment it's title is The Greatest Muppet Movie Ever Made.:)

[SRP76]

In the works as we speak. Jason Siegel of Forgetting Sarah Marshall and I Love You Man fame is working on it. At the moment it's title is The Greatest Muppet Movie Ever Made.:)

Oh, shit. My shoulders just slumped a bit at that news. Probably because I rate the movies you just listed slightly below a puddle of puke.

[bassman]

Oh, shit. My shoulders just slumped a bit at that news. Probably because I rate the movies you just listed slightly below a puddle of puke.

I personally enjoy them, but I think it's fairly safe to say that this Muppet film will be nowhere near the style of those two. I wouldn't pigeon hole the guy into one category just yet.

[SRP76]

It takes at least one movie that I can tolerate before I place any kind of faith in someone.

Now, if I had read "Ron Howard" or even "Kevin Smith" in your post, I'd be getting excited. But maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised.

Silver lining: it's NOT being made by Rob Zombie.

[Eyebiter]

Remakes?

The novel 'The Space Vampires' was released as Lifeforce back in the late 80's. Would like to see a remake that stays closer to the source material.

'The Stuff' would make a great horror film warning the public of genetically modified food.

Either a remake or a sequel to the horror film 'Silent Rage'.

[rongravy]

2. Battlefield Earth. the less said about this film the better.


An amazing book. I read it a million times as a kid. Would've been better to at least make it a trilogy due to its length. When I found out Travolta was defiling it as Terl himself, I still had to see it. One of the biggest pieces of shit I've ever seen, right up there with Blair Witch and Unbreakable...
If someone could do it, the movies would be spectacular.

[LouCipherr]

This may sound stupid, but I think a remake of The Muppet Movie could be good. Current celebrities and some updates to some of the muppets (for instance, you wouldn't have a 60s band in 2010).


Not stupid. BLASPHEMOUS, but not stupid.:lol:



UNACCEPTABLE! NO ONE can replace Dr. Teeth and The Electric Mayhem!

http://www.amoeba.com/dynamic-images/blog/Sarah/dr-teeth-and-the-electric-mayhem

Although I wouldn't mind hearing a nice metal version of "Moving Right Along" Can you imagine Dave Mustaine or someone singing that tune?! :lol:

"Animal! No! No! Not eat drums! Beat drums! Beat drums!" :D


Silver lining: it's NOT being made by Rob Zombie.

*virtual high-five*

[DjfunkmasterG]

I vote HOWARD the DUCK! :D

[Legion2213]

I sometimes wonder what the Edgar Rice Burroughs classic could look like with great effects, a great budget and as little tampering as possible...but they'd probably balls them up. The originals still have charm anyway.

[BillyRay]

Although I normally loathe Americanised remakes of foreign films, I think the time is right for an American version of the 1987 British Dark comedy Eat the Rich.

Class War. Cannibalism. Soundtrack by Motorhead.

(How many Young Ones can you spot?)

An American version wouldn't have worked until recently. But now, we have/had wrestlers and action movie stars as governors. (Home Secretary easily translates to Homeland Security). There's the darker sense of humor developing over here that one gets when their country isn't running the whole world anymore.

As long as you keep the Motorhead soundtrack. That's key.

Here's the trailer:

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"It's amazing how a few seconds with a gun can change your life."