How do you manage your rage?

[SymphonicX]

OK so I've noticed since this year started that I've found myself wound up pretty quickly.
We got a kitty the other week and by and large he's an angel - but he can send me into spastic fits of flying rage because of his persistence - of course I'm not beating my ktteh! I get racked with guilt just for shouting or hissing at him - but with so much stuff recently I've found that I'm like fantasising about really dark stuff due to frustration...like I feel I could lash out at some point and this REALLY isn't me.

I have neither the stature nor the temperament to support these bouts of rage and nor do I want to see it grow into something I can't control. It's like I see RED so much quicker than I used to, and I feel a proper monster boiling away inside me - I've never needed to control rage because, quite frankly, I've never felt a victim to it. I'm usually the pacificist, chilled out guy, who can laugh at most things.

I dunno, it's been a stressing year with finances and home owning and employment worries but ultimately I just want to know what techniques you employ to subside your rage or to vent it in useful ways?

[Eyebiter]

To deal with the cat, water is a great deterrent.


http://www.dogtrainingequipment.com/images/uploads/trainingequip/spray_bottle/all_spray_400wX274h.jpg

[Trin]

My suggestion - don't have kids.

[Mike70]

drugs, man. lots and lots of drugs.

though i do find that engaging in sociopathic & psychotic behavior in a consequence free environment, otherwise known as playing video games, helps too.

[Skippy911sc]

These are the current times we live in. Nothing but negativity on the news, the jobs market is in the crapper, money is tight. I take my rage out on video games. It also puts me in my place at times :) . I don't care for cats so that would be an issue easily resolved, but I do have three huge, hairy, smelly dogs that drive me up the wall. I let them out... stand there and wait for them, they don't come back. I go sit down... then "Bark Bark Bark". I get up go let 1 of them in. Call the others...nothing. Go sit down, "Bark Bark Bark". Go back up stairs let that one in... call the other... nothing. Go back... oh you get the point.

[Ghost Of War]

40mg of Fluoxetine daily for the past 18 months.

I suffer from clinical depression, and rage can be a symptom. I find that taking the dog out for a walk for an hour helps sometimes, I like being alone for a bit, helps me clear my head. Also, music helps me A LOT. I'd throw my iPod on and listen to thrash metal all day long if I could, but work, family, etc. puts a stop to that. (that sounded really selfish, but it's true).

A wife that loves me is the best thing though, she understands what is wrong with me, and although it must be really hard for her sometimes, when I get really badly depressed, she's a fucking angel.

I'm not saying you should start taking prozac, but having someone to talk to helps.

[SymphonicX]

Actually there may be a point with the video games thing - this year I've been totally disappointed with video games and as a result haven't really gotten into any - so I've purposely avoided giving it any real time....would explain why it's only a problem until recently!

[JDFP]

I'm a drunk. When I become stressed out or just try to shut everything out for awhile I will buy a 12 pack of beer (generally Milwaukee's Best) and kick back and watch a few movies and just drink until I pass out.

It usually works well in helping to allieve stress/problems.

Yeah, I'm probably an alcoholic actually... I should get into video games like the rest of you, but I'm too broke to dish out money to buy any game systems or games...

Hmm, maybe if I stopped drinking 3-4 nights a week and saved the money that would have otherwise gone towards beer I'd have more money to buy a game system. Okay, anyway... this stream of consciousness has been brought to you by --

j.p.

[AcesandEights]

How about a secluded getaway to the mountains?

http://www.markayartcelebrities.com/images/MCS_Jack_Nicholson_Heres_Johnny.jpg

Symph, do you know what's causing this uptick in negative aggressive moods? Not just your cat, but what's letting you get so wound up that your cat can set you off or engender such negative emotional responses? If it's just a period of stress that you're passing through due to known issues (the need to work double overtime, school piling up on you, working away from family and loved ones for an extended period of time etc.), that's one thing. But if you're not sure, then you probably need to take stock of what's up in your life and identify what has you so out of sorts.

Attempt to clearly identify the root cause and see what can be done about that, everything else is just symptom management.

[Tricky]

Having OCD & being prone to depression, I get irritable often but I never lash out so it tends to bottle up inside me & over time I get very tired, brain fogged, and open to attack from my OCD, which leaves me with horrible intrusive thoughts at times & a load of anxiety, its self perpetuating! I would never ever hurt anyone, I've never been in a fight as an adult (apart from getting punched by chavs while drunk at xmas) & I dont intend on ever taking my anger out on someone physically. But things like the whole Raoul Moat & derrick bird stories in the news recently terrify me in case they were dealing with the same thoughts I suffer with, and it makes me very scared of my own anger :(
I research relaxation techniques & try things out to see what works for me, playing guitar, a long hot bath, breathing exercises, weight training, walking in the countryside & reading help me out no end, but what works one day sometimes doesnt work the next. Sometimes computer games help, but they can stress me out just as much at times, unless I play a nice relaxing city building game or something. Sometimes playing aggressive & gory games makes me worry about why I'm playing them, so I tend to stay away from those as well & I try to avoid the extremely violent films in case they trigger off the shitty brain farts, I tie myself in knots with these thoughts sometimes :annoyed: The fact I worry about these aggressive thoughts & that they make me very anxious rather than enjoying them is a good indicator that I wont act on them so is agreed by the shrinks, but it doesnt make me any less scared of them when im stuck with them!

[Mike70]

How about a secluded getaway to the mountains?

http://www.markayartcelebrities.com/images/MCS_Jack_Nicholson_Heres_Johnny.jpg

Symph, do you know what's causing this uptick in negative aggressive moods? Not just your cat, but what's letting you get so wound up that your cat can set you off or engender such negative emotional responses? If it's just a period of stress that you're passing through due to known issues (the need to work double overtime, school piling up on you, working away from family and loved ones for an extended period of time etc.), that's one thing. But if you're not sure, then you probably need to take stock of what's up in your life and identify what has you so out of sorts.

Attempt to clearly identify the root cause and see what can be done about that, everything else is just symptom management.

i think it's 2012. the mayans are sending signals through time in an effort to drive symph mad and bring on the coming apocalypse.

[SymphonicX]

How about a secluded getaway to the mountains?

http://www.markayartcelebrities.com/images/MCS_Jack_Nicholson_Heres_Johnny.jpg

Symph, do you know what's causing this uptick in negative aggressive moods? Not just your cat, but what's letting you get so wound up that your cat can set you off or engender such negative emotional responses? If it's just a period of stress that you're passing through due to known issues (the need to work double overtime, school piling up on you, working away from family and loved ones for an extended period of time etc.), that's one thing. But if you're not sure, then you probably need to take stock of what's up in your life and identify what has you so out of sorts.

Attempt to clearly identify the root cause and see what can be done about that, everything else is just symptom management.

I think you've got a point there - it's hard to know if I was under the same stress before but had an outlet for it - or has it grown from nothing recently...
I mean recently I've spent a lot of time away from my fiancee and we've both been quite stressed what with work and shit like that - and what makes it worse is when we don't see each other for ages, we tend to express the negative stuff because we've both not had each other for support so it all comes out at once....
I think it's just loads of really small things that have piled on top of each other - I'm not sure, I was partly putting it down to getting older, like an inner progression in my head that ultimately means I'm a bit grumpier or more impatient....hence why I've given up playing games...maybe I just convinced myself I've outgrown things when in reality I've just let everything get on top of me and don't feel enthusiastic for my stress outlets anymore....

and yeah spot on with the whole symptom management thing - I really should think about how this stuff is ravelled - where the root causes are and if they are in fact just a sort of periodical shift in my life or indeed it's small changes which have snowballed into big stresses - such as the impending fear culture of losing my job or having a lot of maintenance to do on my property, shit like that.....thanks for your post :)

---------- Post added at 05:11 PM ---------- Previous post was at 05:06 PM ----------


i think it's 2012. the mayans are sending signals through time in an effort to drive symph mad and bring on the coming apocalypse.

I knew there was a reason I was building odd shaped pyramids out of mash potato!

---------- Post added at 05:16 PM ---------- Previous post was at 05:11 PM ----------


Having OCD & being prone to depression, I get irritable often but I never lash out so it tends to bottle up inside me & over time I get very tired, brain fogged, and open to attack from my OCD, which leaves me with horrible intrusive thoughts at times & a load of anxiety, its self perpetuating! I would never ever hurt anyone, I've never been in a fight as an adult (apart from getting punched by chavs while drunk at xmas) & I dont intend on ever taking my anger out on someone physically. But things like the whole Raoul Moat & derrick bird stories in the news recently terrify me in case they were dealing with the same thoughts I suffer with, and it makes me very scared of my own anger :(
I research relaxation techniques & try things out to see what works for me, playing guitar, a long hot bath, breathing exercises, weight training, walking in the countryside & reading help me out no end, but what works one day sometimes doesnt work the next. Sometimes computer games help, but they can stress me out just as much at times, unless I play a nice relaxing city building game or something. Sometimes playing aggressive & gory games makes me worry about why I'm playing them, so I tend to stay away from those as well & I try to avoid the extremely violent films in case they trigger off the shitty brain farts, I tie myself in knots with these thoughts sometimes :annoyed: The fact I worry about these aggressive thoughts & that they make me very anxious rather than enjoying them is a good indicator that I wont act on them so is agreed by the shrinks, but it doesnt make me any less scared of them when im stuck with them!


I'd say shrinks would be spot on - the most likely people to be mass murders don't exactly display the level of empathy and care that you seem to apply to your own thought processes - it's being unaware of this stuff which is far more dangerous....

I know what you mean about the dark stuff though - like I listen to metal, watch gory horror films and even read dark books - if I can migrate to the darker side of entertainment, I do it straight away - and sometimes I just cant get my head around 29 year old disney kids who only watch shit like The Lion King....

but then it's not like 1984 isn't dark, so y'know - there's value in the dark stuff - sometimes I wonder to myself why I feel physically revolted at the prospect of watching a kids film though....

[slickwilly13]

I manage my rage by pounding on a pillow or my 130 lbs Thai bag. It beats going to jail.

[DubiousComforts]

Hopefully, a lot better than this freak (http://forum.homepageofthedead.com/showthread.php?t=17076).

[MikePizzoff]

How do I manage my rage? The stupid way. By punching holes in the wall or a door until I [re]fuck up my boxers fracture.

[ProfessorChaos]

these days, i usually go running or lift some weights, or just take a long bath. talking things through with a loved one helps, too.

wish i'd got around to managing my anger problems a few years ago, though. i've got a bit of a short fuse from my father, i suppose, and my military experiences, particularly some of those in iraq, really added to the problem. my first few years back from iraq were pretty rough at times (though i never kicked any dogs, DC, so don't label all of us jarheads as dog-kickers.)

i used to keep it all locked up inside and then let it out in a torrent of hateful words and rants, occasionally throwing shit around the room and just screaming. that sort of stuff didn't happen to often, but i didn't see the warning signs about how much it was consuming me...

sadly, it ended up causing me to lose the love of my life (up till this point, at least) when we had a big argument over nothing and i drove her out of my life. we had some of the same shit going on as you and your ladyfriend, symph: moved apart, long distance took its toll, and we focused on all the things that were wrong with us instead of what was right. so please, take it from me, don't take it out on others, find a constructive outlet and channel that emotion into something positive.

[rongravy]

Anytime I get down, I just get high with my ferret.
She loves the stuff, but I ain't letting her get drunk again. She is totally antisocial...
Animals love to get stoned. Before anyone gets bent over it, she throws a fit if I don't blow the smoke in her face.
Wanna blow some steam off...?

[blind2d]

Very carefully!
But seriously, I'm a skateboarder, so that's what I do... as a more immediate response, I either breathe deeply or try to get my mind off of whatever is bugging me (easier done than said!)

[acealive1]

actually, playing GTA vice city, vice city stories or san andreas does wonders for rage for me. im not a violent person but like anyone, i have moments where i cant contain it

[Danny]

Since i was a teenager the biggest problem i've ever had is anxiety, to the point i would get constant stomach aches and spasm of pain in my neck and joints. But i picked up a little tai chi and zazen buddhist meditation and it cleared completely up. So i'm lucky that my biggest fault is worry. Trouble is its like a whirlpool and can build on itself but rage? Honestly not really. It takes an incredible amount of bad things all occurring at once to even get me to raise my voice, let alone lose my shit.
Life is far too short and you only lie it once and if its spent in the moment but only for anger then its more poorly spent than living in the past or dreaming of a future that might never come.
I dunno, maybe its the zen thing but anger does'nt serve a use for me, i'm trying very hard to remember when ive really lost my shit and im coming up blank. I can remember times ive been disappointed by someone, or despaired at there actions to me or themselves but never really angry it just doesnt serve a purpose y'know?
It may sound stupid but if your getting angry, like youve tripped, as you get up you knock over a pile of dvds or something and then lean forward to catch them and trip again and hurt your foot- something that would keep building pressure just take a moment. stop. and just chill the fuck out. its that simple. think of the big lebowski, what would the dude do in your situation?

That might sound odd but that helped a friend of mine get over his severe volatile anger issues. a few of us sat him down, made him watch the big lebowski and then when he started to lose his shit because he got the wrong order at kfc or something we'd just go "dude, push pause, breath, what would the dude do?". he says he stopped himself from getting fired from his work several times with that one.:lol:

If shit gets bad enough to make you see red, just think of bowling and how 'the dude abides'.;)




i'm gonna hafta watch that now.

[SRP76]

I just stifle it, and keep it bottled up.

That's the most healthy thing, right?

[SymphonicX]

how do i manage my rage? The stupid way. By punching holes in the wall or a door until i [re]fuck up my boxers fracture.

lol !

[Ghost Of War]

I had an "episode" yesterday. I don't want to go into specifics on here, but I came close to beating the crap out of someone I love dearly. I was justified in my anger, but not in my reaction. I feel like shit right now. Time for a trip to the doctor, I think. I feel really low at the moment, when last week I felt ok. Just shows how quickly this happens.

[Wyldwraith]

::raises his hand as someone with experience::

As someone with a) a genetic predisposition to poor anxiety management, judging by my grandmother AND mother who can flip out and get so anxious/worried/upset over something minor-but-stressful so suddenly it can make them really sick for several hours. My anxiety doesn't take the same form as theirs, which I've tentatively concluded is a gender-related difference-of-expression. Me, I can get raised voice suddenly yelling/brief flash-point anger that boils up out of nowhere and then vanishes completely and totally just as quickly when stressed. b) Someone who has suffered from SEVERE Clinical Depression, severe Fibromyalgia, and a multi-layered series of causes of severe 24/7/365 chronic pain (some diagnosed issues explain parts of my pain(s), but not others) in the Lumbar region of my spine and in/around the Sacroiliac joints, one knee and my left shoulder due to some sort of inflammation-based problems....

I can tell you that if you've lost interest completely in something that, up until recently, was a primary form of recreation/source of relaxation, its an indicator of more than simply not being into the recent crop of video games. If that was all it was, it wouldn't explain why you didn't shift to playing old favorites for something to do.

Not a doctor, but I've experienced enough to know you NEED to see your M.D and fully disclose ALL the details of your recent mental/emotional shifts.
It could be as simple as additional stress, or it could be something much more serious like a chemical imbalance in the brain, serious depression, the emergence of some form of anxiety disorder. Your problem could even have a very real, very physical cause SymphonicX. Such as a hormonal imbalance, or even (God forbid) a brain tumor, lesion or cyst in an area now affecting you emotionally.

My point is, this is a LOT MORE SERIOUS than learning to count to ten or meditate (though depending on the cause, many of these might prove helpful with symptom management IN ADDITION TO, NOT IN PLACE OF the examination by your M.D and any tests he/she might need to run, or that the specialist he refers you to may need to do to reach a diagnosis.

Early detection and treatment can, depending on what's wrong, mean the difference between a dodged bullet and being screwed for life.

Please, PLEASE, see your M.D and comprehensively explain ALL aspects of your problem. Then DO WHAT he/she SAYS.

It's your health you're talking about. More serious, the health of your mind. Take it from someone who lives with ever-present agony AND emotional/psychological dysfunction(s)....the faster you go for medical diagnosis & treatment, the better your chances of putting this 100% behind you for good.

Sure, it MIGHT be nothing serious. Might. Is your mental and emotional health something you want to gamble on "Might"?

See your doctor.

[bassman]

It takes a hell of a lot to make me as angry as some of you guys are talking about. I can't even remember the last time I went into a blind rage. Probably when I was a teenager. But I guess that's normal...


And if you have a big problem with rage....smoke a joint every once in a while.;)

[BillyRay]

And if you have a big problem with rage....smoke a joint every once in a while.;)

Hear Hear!

....what were we talking about?

[SymphonicX]

Unfortunately that's actually part of the problem....! But no way I'm going into detail on THAT subject at work!

[Ghost Of War]

::raises his hand as someone with experience::

As someone with a) a genetic predisposition to poor anxiety management, judging by my grandmother AND mother who can flip out and get so anxious/worried/upset over something minor-but-stressful so suddenly it can make them really sick for several hours. My anxiety doesn't take the same form as theirs, which I've tentatively concluded is a gender-related difference-of-expression. Me, I can get raised voice suddenly yelling/brief flash-point anger that boils up out of nowhere and then vanishes completely and totally just as quickly when stressed. b) Someone who has suffered from SEVERE Clinical Depression, severe Fibromyalgia, and a multi-layered series of causes of severe 24/7/365 chronic pain (some diagnosed issues explain parts of my pain(s), but not others) in the Lumbar region of my spine and in/around the Sacroiliac joints, one knee and my left shoulder due to some sort of inflammation-based problems....

I can tell you that if you've lost interest completely in something that, up until recently, was a primary form of recreation/source of relaxation, its an indicator of more than simply not being into the recent crop of video games. If that was all it was, it wouldn't explain why you didn't shift to playing old favorites for something to do.

Not a doctor, but I've experienced enough to know you NEED to see your M.D and fully disclose ALL the details of your recent mental/emotional shifts.
It could be as simple as additional stress, or it could be something much more serious like a chemical imbalance in the brain, serious depression, the emergence of some form of anxiety disorder. Your problem could even have a very real, very physical cause SymphonicX. Such as a hormonal imbalance, or even (God forbid) a brain tumor, lesion or cyst in an area now affecting you emotionally.

My point is, this is a LOT MORE SERIOUS than learning to count to ten or meditate (though depending on the cause, many of these might prove helpful with symptom management IN ADDITION TO, NOT IN PLACE OF the examination by your M.D and any tests he/she might need to run, or that the specialist he refers you to may need to do to reach a diagnosis.

Early detection and treatment can, depending on what's wrong, mean the difference between a dodged bullet and being screwed for life.

Please, PLEASE, see your M.D and comprehensively explain ALL aspects of your problem. Then DO WHAT he/she SAYS.

It's your health you're talking about. More serious, the health of your mind. Take it from someone who lives with ever-present agony AND emotional/psychological dysfunction(s)....the faster you go for medical diagnosis & treatment, the better your chances of putting this 100% behind you for good.

Sure, it MIGHT be nothing serious. Might. Is your mental and emotional health something you want to gamble on "Might"?

See your doctor.

Brilliant post.

[Danny]

::raises his hand as someone with experience::

As someone with a) a genetic predisposition to poor anxiety management, judging by my grandmother AND mother who can flip out and get so anxious/worried/upset over something minor-but-stressful so suddenly it can make them really sick for several hours. My anxiety doesn't take the same form as theirs, which I've tentatively concluded is a gender-related difference-of-expression. Me, I can get raised voice suddenly yelling/brief flash-point anger that boils up out of nowhere and then vanishes completely and totally just as quickly when stressed. b) Someone who has suffered from SEVERE Clinical Depression, severe Fibromyalgia, and a multi-layered series of causes of severe 24/7/365 chronic pain (some diagnosed issues explain parts of my pain(s), but not others) in the Lumbar region of my spine and in/around the Sacroiliac joints, one knee and my left shoulder due to some sort of inflammation-based problems....

I can tell you that if you've lost interest completely in something that, up until recently, was a primary form of recreation/source of relaxation, its an indicator of more than simply not being into the recent crop of video games. If that was all it was, it wouldn't explain why you didn't shift to playing old favorites for something to do.

Not a doctor, but I've experienced enough to know you NEED to see your M.D and fully disclose ALL the details of your recent mental/emotional shifts.
It could be as simple as additional stress, or it could be something much more serious like a chemical imbalance in the brain, serious depression, the emergence of some form of anxiety disorder. Your problem could even have a very real, very physical cause SymphonicX. Such as a hormonal imbalance, or even (God forbid) a brain tumor, lesion or cyst in an area now affecting you emotionally.

My point is, this is a LOT MORE SERIOUS than learning to count to ten or meditate (though depending on the cause, many of these might prove helpful with symptom management IN ADDITION TO, NOT IN PLACE OF the examination by your M.D and any tests he/she might need to run, or that the specialist he refers you to may need to do to reach a diagnosis.

Early detection and treatment can, depending on what's wrong, mean the difference between a dodged bullet and being screwed for life.

Please, PLEASE, see your M.D and comprehensively explain ALL aspects of your problem. Then DO WHAT he/she SAYS.

It's your health you're talking about. More serious, the health of your mind. Take it from someone who lives with ever-present agony AND emotional/psychological dysfunction(s)....the faster you go for medical diagnosis & treatment, the better your chances of putting this 100% behind you for good.

Sure, it MIGHT be nothing serious. Might. Is your mental and emotional health something you want to gamble on "Might"?

See your doctor.

sound advice, i know plenty of people who are embarrassed to talk to doctors even with doctor patient confidentiality. But really thats what they are there for. I think people forget the old add-age of "if you think your crazy you arent" y'know?
If you have a problem with overwhelming anger i would say go to the doctor. i whent when i had pains in my jaw and headaches and it turned out to just be anxiety. Being told whats up can work wonders compared to not knowing and assuming its something else, which can lead to exacerbating a situation.

Losing your temper more than once a week on average is a porblem. But theres always solutions dude. The most likely scenario is either change your routine, or maybe some light medication. Theres plenty of people who wouldnt like the idea of being told they wherent completely normal, whatever that may be, and put it off when a simple doctors visit may change your life for the better.

[Wyldwraith]

@Ghost of War: Thanks. I take problems like SymphonicX's seriously based on learned experience. Had I opened up to my M.D much earlier and not been afraid of being labeled a drug-seeking patient like this bitch pain specialist at one of the local hospitals accused me of TEN SECONDS AFTER MEETING ME, I might not be as disabled as I am today.

Basically, I let that bitch influence my choices, and it cost me a LOT.

@Hellsing: You make an excellent point as well. I started out no different myself in not wanting to dive into personal/uncomfortable, what I felt to be private matters with anyone, least of all my doctor. It's a mental trap based on bad instinct that we all need to overcome though. I believe the tendency not to disclose our problems/negative health developments is very similar to the way a wounded pack animal will often separate from its pack temporarily and go to ground to lick its wounds.

If so, it's certainly an instinct that works against us.

Of course there's always the head-in-the-sand mentality about scary health developments. Someone notices a mole on their arm is now looking funky, they go "Oh, I must've scratched it. Better put a bit of antibiotic ointment on it and slap a band-aid over it." Then they put it out of their mind, because they don't want to think "Damn, I might have skin cancer."

Which is EXACTLY what my stepdad did, and is now being treated for late. LUCKILY his stupidity didn't cost him more than needing to have a silver-dollar-diameter of flesh perhaps a 1/3 of an inch deep removed from his forearm.

Had he dealt with it when he first noticed it, it would have been a simple pre-cancerous mole removal, followed by some tri-monthly follow-up examinations by his dermatologist. Had he been single he might've died, because it took my Mom, me and my grandmother endlessly nagging his ass to get him to go have it checked out. I remember him leaving for the doctor all grumpy and snappish at us, and coming back 2hrs later quieter than I'd seen him since his mother passed away.

So yea, lot of reasons to think the way I do, and very insightful point you make.

[LouCipherr]

Well, first off, I guess I can't say I really "rage" on anything or anyone - you'd have to seriously fuck up my day for that to happen.

That being said, I do go through some major anger phases once in a while. How do I relieve that? Well, a few things:

1) Smoke a joint/bowl/bong/whatever is handy. Bassman and several others have it right. Light up and fuckin' chill out. Works for me 90% of the time.

2) Music is my friend. If I'm pissed off, I do one of two things: blast some REALLY heavy shit on my stereo or ipod, or I will sit down with my guitar in hand and just start playing or writing the heaviest, angriest shit that I can put down. Sometimes some great music comes from it! When they say music can be a cathartic experience, they are not kidding. I've not only relieved some of my anger, but sometimes I come up with some kickass tunes (see the coovan snorting scene from The Inevitable Decomposition of Zombie Man. Was conceived during a bout of anger/frustration)

3) Nature. Sometimes, but rarely, I will just lock myself in a room and put something soothing on the ipod or stereo. An ocean or thunderstorm cd. Anything to just give me some peaceful, chill-out ambience which helps....sometimes.

Ususally, 1 or 2 will do the trick.

Times when neither of the three above work, I just go out and kill someone's kittens. That always helps. :lol: :D

[Tricky]

Well, first off, I guess I can't say I really "rage" on anything or anyone - you'd have to seriously fuck up my day for that to happen.

That being said, I do go through some major anger phases once in a while. How do I relieve that? Well, a few things:



Yeah thats like me, I never get in a blind rage, I just get a bit irritable and occasionally an inanimate object might get a kick, but mostly I'll just chunter & swear to myself a bit (usually happens when Im driving)
I cant do the joint thing though, weed really sets my OCD & anxiety off, so I stay well clear of that!
Slamming a bit of hard rock on the old stereo at ear bleeding volume does help, as do walks in the country, or even sometimes listening to a bit of enya or something like that

[Danny]

I know a friend of mine has a particular music thing for when she gets buggy. angry, worried, stressed, whatever. She says she puts on something like journey, daft punk, something that isn't angry or melancholic. something very hard to be in a negative mood whilst listening to. that or jsut go sit out in her garden and enjoy the day, which lets face it, nobody does really anymore.
ive lived in my current place for almost a year now and maybe...ten times ive hung out in the garden?, im either out and about or inside, never out in my garden.


Course i have a 70+yrs old, alcoholic mad russian lady who sunbathes topless.:barf:

[Ghost Of War]

Music is definitely my main outlet. Either some Slayer, Vader, some really heavy aggressive shit. Or if I need to chill, some Pink Floyd. Usually the heavier the better, though. I'm feeling a lot better tonight, but I've still got this underlying anger simmering away beneath the surface. My wife wants me to have a word with the doc to see if my medication can be changed from prozac, I've already had my dosage doubled in the past 6 months and maybe it's just not working for me.

[Danny]

Music is definitely my main outlet. Either some Slayer, Vader, some really heavy aggressive shit. Or if I need to chill, some Pink Floyd. Usually the heavier the better, though. I'm feeling a lot better tonight, but I've still got this underlying anger simmering away beneath the surface. My wife wants me to have a word with the doc to see if my medication can be changed from prozac, I've already had my dosage doubled in the past 6 months and maybe it's just not working for me.

daft punks always worked for me with damn near anything. the discovery album in particular. hard to pissed off when face to face or digital love's playing. Though electric six works well too for me.
Not into metal anymore. no reason really. just when some seven minute thing comes on, something long like raining blood it just seems... exhausting and i skip it on my shuffle.

[Tricky]

Get a bit of hayseed dixie on! you cant help but smile at them covering rock classics in the hillbilly style! :lol:

-xxh492o2aM
XoWaRKgICEw

[acealive1]

Get a bit of hayseed dixie on! you cant help but smile at them covering rock classics in the hillbilly style! :lol:

-xxh492o2aM
XoWaRKgICEw



SCARRED. FOR. LIFE. :stunned:

[Ghost Of War]

Get a bit of hayseed dixie on! you cant help but smile at them covering rock classics in the hillbilly style! :lol:

-xxh492o2aM
XoWaRKgICEw

LOVE this band, I saw them live in the o2 academy in Liverpool a while back. 'twas a great gig.

[Yojimbo]

::raises his hand as someone with experience::

As someone with a) a genetic predisposition to poor anxiety management, judging by my grandmother AND mother who can flip out and get so anxious/worried/upset over something minor-but-stressful so suddenly it can make them really sick for several hours. My anxiety doesn't take the same form as theirs, which I've tentatively concluded is a gender-related difference-of-expression. Me, I can get raised voice suddenly yelling/brief flash-point anger that boils up out of nowhere and then vanishes completely and totally just as quickly when stressed. b) Someone who has suffered from SEVERE Clinical Depression, severe Fibromyalgia, and a multi-layered series of causes of severe 24/7/365 chronic pain (some diagnosed issues explain parts of my pain(s), but not others) in the Lumbar region of my spine and in/around the Sacroiliac joints, one knee and my left shoulder due to some sort of inflammation-based problems....

I can tell you that if you've lost interest completely in something that, up until recently, was a primary form of recreation/source of relaxation, its an indicator of more than simply not being into the recent crop of video games. If that was all it was, it wouldn't explain why you didn't shift to playing old favorites for something to do.

Not a doctor, but I've experienced enough to know you NEED to see your M.D and fully disclose ALL the details of your recent mental/emotional shifts.
It could be as simple as additional stress, or it could be something much more serious like a chemical imbalance in the brain, serious depression, the emergence of some form of anxiety disorder. Your problem could even have a very real, very physical cause SymphonicX. Such as a hormonal imbalance, or even (God forbid) a brain tumor, lesion or cyst in an area now affecting you emotionally.

My point is, this is a LOT MORE SERIOUS than learning to count to ten or meditate (though depending on the cause, many of these might prove helpful with symptom management IN ADDITION TO, NOT IN PLACE OF the examination by your M.D and any tests he/she might need to run, or that the specialist he refers you to may need to do to reach a diagnosis.

Early detection and treatment can, depending on what's wrong, mean the difference between a dodged bullet and being screwed for life.

Please, PLEASE, see your M.D and comprehensively explain ALL aspects of your problem. Then DO WHAT he/she SAYS.

It's your health you're talking about. More serious, the health of your mind. Take it from someone who lives with ever-present agony AND emotional/psychological dysfunction(s)....the faster you go for medical diagnosis & treatment, the better your chances of putting this 100% behind you for good.

Sure, it MIGHT be nothing serious. Might. Is your mental and emotional health something you want to gamble on "Might"?

See your doctor.


Well stated and undeniably sound advice. I salute wyld for his candor and insight.

We all go south sometimes, but the mark of a sane person is to know when to ask for help with going south.

[Chic Freak]

I recommend counselling- if you're in the UK you can get it on the NHS in batches of three sessions over three weeks. Just ask your GP.

DON'T self-prescribe drugs to suppress your rage as it turns it inwards, just changing it from anger to depression rather than actually managing it.

I'm taking an acting class atm and finding a lot of rage bubbling out when I'm there. I feel oddly high when it's over :)

[MinionZombie]

I recommend counselling- if you're in the UK you can get it on the NHS in batches of three sessions over three weeks. Just ask your GP.

DON'T self-prescribe drugs to suppress your rage as it turns it inwards, just changing it from anger to depression rather than actually managing it.

I'm taking an acting class atm and finding a lot of rage bubbling out when I'm there. I feel oddly high when it's over :)
Interesting thing you said about the acting class thingy.

While not the same, I do remember back at uni I got all in a knot about something and had one of those 'wake up, realise something you said the night before, and want to disappear' moments and spent the entire day depressed as all get out ... anyway, that night I went to see a rock gig on campus and I just raged for the duration and came back feeling brilliant - like you said, Chic, you come back feeling kind of high.

I've also had times when I've not dealt with rage/stress well ... several times in fact.

One time was in the final semester and there was a lot of stuff going on that was stressing me out and making me paranoid over stupid things, and I eventually blew my lid over it all (something daft was the last straw, but it's a long story) and that re-adjusted the situation in the house for the better, but it didn't solve what was stressing me out.

Another time was in the first year at uni and I was all bent out of shape over something - my outlook on many things was different back then - and I remember two housemates coming back drunk and they thought it would be a good idea to get my attention by throwing pebbles at my window, but one threw a stone and it broke the window. I. FLIPPED. MY. SHIT. over that and exploded into a fury I'd not had before and haven't had since.

The rage was so pronounced that the stone thrower was terrified and actually thought he'd get thrown out of campus accomodation (although he was drunk at the time too), and my voice actually cut out completely mid-screaming-sentence. The girls in the res all came down as they were concerned, but also said later on how they were really quite scared - naturally I would have never directed my rage at them, but that was the one time that I royally went nuts and it quite surprised me (and everyone else at the time).

It may sound a bit daft, but I've found games like GTA to be quite theraputic when you're a bit pissed off - you go on there and cause havoc and blast a bunch of peds away and smash about in cars and that, and I come away after an hour feeling more relaxed.

I also remind myself of times when I have flipped my lid whenever I'm getting angry - like on the road when you're surrounded by fucking morons - because it makes me think "calm down, you don't want to do anything stupid, someone could get hurt" or whatever, and that makes me keep it in check.

However I do think that there are just some times in our lives when everything can feel like it's getting on top of you (like my final semester at uni, as I said before, when there was a lot of stuff going on that was stressing me out, and there were issues that I was ignoring that were having an affect on me without me really knowing it) and there's not an awful lot you can do about it, but I think the first thing that can certainly be done is to realise that you're having a problem.

Over your lifetime such effects on your psyche will come from differing sources and affect you in different ways and you'll deal with it in different ways as you get older and have more life experience, not that that'll really help much in dealing with the problem at present, but I suppose we learn to deal with different things at different times in our lives in different ways ... but I guess as it is with life, everybody's learning.

Went off on a bit of a tangent there, but it all just sprung to mind.

[Tricky]

Paintballing is pretty good for de-stressing as well, its not the shooting at people that does it, that would be scary, its just the whole outdoors running around letting off steam thing, I always feel worn out & de-stressed after my monthly walk-on day!
I've never got in a total blind rage, but I have come close a few times, notably when a woman ran into the back of my car last december, I got out of my car shouting & swearing and actually scared her (turns out she ran into someone else months before who actually got out & punched her which is why she was scared), as soon as I'd cooled off I felt utterly embarassed, ashamed & shaken that I'd kicked off like that, and I rang her to apologise for my behaviour which she accepted.
Apart from that the only real tantrums i've had were with my dad when I was in my teens, I remember punching my bedroom wall a few times, or breaking things in my room after family arguments, but I think a lot of teens do that and worse.

[Chic Freak]

While not the same, I do remember back at uni I got all in a knot about something and had one of those 'wake up, realise something you said the night before, and want to disappear' moments and spent the entire day depressed as all get out ... anyway, that night I went to see a rock gig on campus and I just raged for the duration and came back feeling brilliant - like you said, Chic, you come back feeling kind of high.

I know everyone thinks Freud's completely out of date (he was writing a long time ago, in fairness) but one of the smartest things he ever said was "depression is anger turned inward." Vent your rage successfully and you won't feel so depressed!

[MinionZombie]

I know everyone thinks Freud's completely out of date (he was writing a long time ago, in fairness) but one of the smartest things he ever said was "depression is anger turned inward." Vent your rage successfully and you won't feel so depressed!
It's probably the best way to deal with it, at least immediately. If it's a recurring problem then obviously something more is necessary, but when it's something that can affect you from time to time - like it can to all of us - then getting that anger and stress out works wonders, like my above example. I cannot even describe the shift in attitude and how good I felt afterwards, with a shifted perspective on the issue so that I didn't care about it anymore. I just felt sooooooooo good after that gig (it was a kickass gig too).

So, in short, find a way to express the pent up stress and aggression - it's the best way.