I have shamed myself. I watched... "Sharktopus"

[LouCipherr]

I'm still trying to figure out why I subjected myself to this, but I had nothing else to do Saturday evening (that says it all about my life, doesn't it? :lol:) and there was pretty much fuck-all on cable. When I channel surf, I always stop on the SyFy channel just to see what they're showing because who can refuse a cheesy made-for-tv monster flick now and again? :D Well, I kept seeing commericals for the "world premiere" of "Sharktopus" all week - and seeing I had nothing to do, I figured I'd put it on and keep it on in the background while I surfed the 'net on my laptop.

Well, all I can say is, WHAT... THE... FUCK!? HOW DO PEOPLE GET THE BUDGET TO MAKE FILMS LIKE THIS?! I mean, I know it was meant to be bad, that was the whole point, but c'mon man, who willingly gives their money to some dude who pitches his film by saying, "wow, man, like, I have this idea for a movie about a shark, but like, it's not just a shark. It's part octopus too. A 'sharktopus'!" :stunned:

First off, Eric Roberts was in the flick. While I know most of you are going to say "but he was awesome in <insert movie here>" I have to admit, the first Eric Roberts film I saw was The Ambulance, and it has tarnished my view of him ever since.. :lol:

The flick is about this "Sharktopus" creation, made by Roberts, for the government (of course) to use as a weapon (no way!). While testing him out in "open waters" something happens to the electronic thing they attached to Sharktopus to control him (say it isn't so!) and of course, as expected, he's off on his own with a taste for revenge!

The Sharktopus itself is just hilarious. I mean, think about it. Half shark, half octopus. That alone is enough to send anyone into a gigfitgle fit - and that's before you see the damn thing with your own eyes! The best way i can describe it is, picture Jaws from the gills up, and the tentacles from the giant octopus - from Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus - from gills to.....uhhh... the "tail"?

I will admit, Sharktopus killed a LOT of people, but the combination of the really, really bad acting, the laughable CGI (Sharktopus changes in size several times throughout the film), and the horrific dialouge/script..... it was just.. well, perfect! :lol: Taken for what it is: a complete velveeta cheese-fest of a scifi flick that was meant to be so bad you laughed right along with it, then it was great. Taken on a serious level of filmmaking, it was a fail of epic proportions. :D

So kids, run right out to your local Blockbuster and... awww, too soon? :lol: let me try again...

So kids, run right out to your local video rental store (what's that?!) and rent SHARKTOPUS and lose 90 minutes of your life in scifi hell! It's fun! All the kids are doing it! It's like a car wreck - you don't want to look at it, but you just cannot help yourself!

Now, where'd I put my white jacket with the sleeves that buckle behind my back... :shifty:

PS - can either a shark or an octopus walk on land? No? Good, I didn't think so. Just FYI, Sharktopus did. :lol:

[Publius]

PS - can either a shark or an octopus walk on land? No? Good, I didn't think so. Just FYI, Sharktopus did. :lol:

I think that's an accidental leftover from an earlier version of the screenplay. It was originally supposed to be Sharkaphant (http://podpocalypse.wordpress.com/2010/08/11/elephant-shark-jack-handy/).

:-D

[LouCipherr]

I think that's an accidental leftover from an earlier version of the screenplay. It was originally supposed to be Sharkaphant (http://podpocalypse.wordpress.com/2010/08/11/elephant-shark-jack-handy/).

:-D

:lol:

Just when you think an idea can't get any crazier..... :D

[DjfunkmasterG]

Did Sharktopus knock a fighter jet out of the sky... with a THWAP of his tentacle? NO, but Giant Octopus did... Sharktopus is a pussy next to Giant Octopus

[darth los]

:lol:

Just when you think an idea can't get any crazier..... :D

They probably changed it because it sounds too much like SHARKTOFART.

:cool:

[bassman]

I have GOT to see this. Sounds like another fun Batman & Robin, Manos, or Day08 to add to the "fun" list!

[LouCipherr]

I have GOT to see this. Sounds like another fun Batman & Robin, Manos, or Day08 to add to the "fun" list!

Oh, for sure! If you take it for what it is and what it's meant to be, it's fantastic. :lol: If you're looking for a serious monster film, look elsewhere. :D


Did Sharktopus knock a fighter jet out of the sky... with a THWAP of his tentacle? NO, but Giant Octopus did... Sharktopus is a pussy next to Giant Octopus

Sharktopus would eat that giant octopus for lunch, dude. :lol: Remember, he's half shark too!

Actually, now that I think about it, that's what these guys need to do! Have all three battle it out in "Megashark vs. Giant Octopus vs. SHARKTOPUS!" :lol: :lol:

[DjfunkmasterG]

Oh, for sure! If you take it for what it is and what it's meant to be, it's fantastic. :lol: If you're looking for a serious monster film, look elsewhere. :D



Sharktopus would eat that giant octopus for lunch, dude. :lol: Remember, he's half shark too!

Actually, now that I think about it, that's what these guys need to do! Have all three battle it out in "Megashark vs. Giant Octopus vs. SHARKTOPUS!" :lol: :lol:

Hurry up and copyright before someone from Asylum comes in here and steals the idea.

[LouCipherr]

Hurry up and copyright before someone from Asylum comes in here and steals the idea.

Are you kidding me? Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus vs. Sharktopus would be a lot better than the original films! Let 'em have it! :lol: Besides, i'd never get the movie made, but apparently they can somehow convince people to dish out a lot of cash for these hilariously off-the-wall camp flicks, so let 'em have at it. :D

ooh! ooooh! Even better! Combine all three monsters into one for the next flick - MEGA-Sharktopus! or Mega-OctoShark! or maybe SharkoMegaPus! yeah, that's it! :lol:

[BillyRay]

ooh! ooooh! Even better! Combine all three monsters into one for the next flick - MEGA-Sharktopus! or Mega-OctoShark! or maybe SharkoMegaPus! yeah, that's it! :lol:

or Snagglepuss!

exit, stage right...

[AcesandEights]

I sense an opportunity for one of our budding filmmakers to make a Sharktopussy sharktopus/James Bond mashup.

[LouCipherr]

or Snagglepuss!

exit, stage right...

Snagglepuss FTW!! :D


I sense an opportunity for one of our budding filmmakers need to make a Sharktopussy sharktopus/James Bond mashup.

*looks in the general direction of Dj*

C'mon man, you know you wanna do it! :lol:

[BillyRay]

*looks in the general direction of Dj*

C'mon man, you know you wanna do it! :lol:

Yeah, one of 'em can be driving a Camaro, the other a Beemer, and be stuck in traffic during a zombie apocalypse!

**Just trying to see how many threads I can merge in one posting.

(BaconHobbitDeadRising2)

[DjfunkmasterG]

Snagglepuss FTW!! :D



*looks in the general direction of Dj*

C'mon man, you know you wanna do it! :lol:

Don't look at me.. I don't do mash-ups.


Yeah, one of 'em can be driving a Camaro, the other a Beemer, and be stuck in traffic during a zombie apocalypse!

**Just trying to see how many threads I can merge in one posting.

(BaconHobbitDeadRising2)

You forgot ELMO dammit!

[LouCipherr]

...and SKYNET! :lol:

[BillyRay]

http://i996.photobucket.com/albums/af81/Pac-Rat/TheElmonator_edited.jpg

FINE! HAPPY NOW?

[LouCipherr]

I am.

:D

[MoonSylver]

First off, Eric Roberts was in the flick. While I know most of you are going to say "but he was awesome in <insert movie here>" I have to admit, the first Eric Roberts film I saw was The Ambulance, and it has tarnished my view of him ever since.. :lol:

I never cease to be amazed at the actors who have (or had) a career, or who are great actors, who do any ol' shit work that comes along, just to make the boat payment or whatever. Michael Cane used to be the king of that, but in his latter years he seems to have gone back to doing quality work again.


The Sharktopus itself is just hilarious. I mean, think about it. Half shark, half octopus. That alone is enough to send anyone into a gigfitgle fit - and that's before you see the damn thing with your own eyes! The best way i can describe it is, picture Jaws from the gills up, and the tentacles from the giant octopus - from Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus - from gills to.....uhhh... the "tail"?

I think they get 5 year olds, put 'em in a room & let 'em play, & then swipe their ideas. 'Cause this is just the kind of thing a kid would come up with. When I see the premere of "The Colossal Poop Man", my theory will be validated. :lol:

[blind2d]

The Colossal Poop Man... hmm... that's not copyrighted, is it? I could use that...
It'd be like the fudge guy from Candyland, only bigger... and made of poo... Hey! Conker's Bad Fur Day! The Great Mighty Poo! There you are!

[LouCipherr]

The people over at Asylum are drooling over these ideas I'm sure.. :D

[DjfunkmasterG]

http://i996.photobucket.com/albums/af81/Pac-Rat/TheElmonator_edited.jpg

FINE! HAPPY NOW?

Yep that about satisfies me. :D

[MikePizzoff]

I was over a buddies house in Baltimore this past weekend, looking through his obscenely awesome horror collection..... only to spot Mega Shark VS Giant Octopus amongst his DVDs.

[bassman]

I was over a buddies house in Baltimore this past weekend, looking through his obscenely awesome horror collection..... only to spot Mega Shark VS Giant Octopus amongst his DVDs.

Hey....it's not a true dvd collection unless you have:

A) One or two of which you have no idea how they got there
B) A couple of stinkers that you for some reason hang on to
C) Unopened cases from years past that will most likely NEVER be opened.

[LouCipherr]

I was over a buddies house in Baltimore this past weekend, looking through his obscenely awesome horror collection..... only to spot Mega Shark VS Giant Octopus amongst his DVDs.

...but no Sharktopus? What's wrong with your friends, man? :lol: :D

[MikePizzoff]

Hey....it's not a true dvd collection unless you have:

A) One or two of which you have no idea how they got there
B) A couple of stinkers that you for some reason hang on to
C) Unopened cases from years past that will most likely NEVER be opened.

A) - Check. I've got some independent movie called Love Cracked in my collection... no clue where it came from.
B) - Check. Death Tunnel. Rock & Roll High School Forever. Ernest Goes To Camp. Surfer Dude.
C) - Check. Surfer Dude.

[bassman]

Whoa, whoa, whoa. You're calling Ernest Goes to Camp a stinker?!? Shame on you. Ernest P. Worrell is a legend.

[LouCipherr]

A legend in his own mind, perhaps. :shifty: :D

[bassman]

A legend in his own mind, perhaps. :shifty: :D

Jim Varney WAS a legend. You're wrong. WRONG I TELL YOU!!!

Nah....I grew up on the Ernest movies, so they hold a special place in my heart. Besides....he was slinky dog!

[LouCipherr]

Actually, when I was young I liked him... As I got older, that's when I started to question my own sanity, but I admit, as a kid I dug Ernest/JV. :D

[Legion2213]

Hey....it's not a true dvd collection unless you have:

A) One or two of which you have no idea how they got there
B) A couple of stinkers that you for some reason hang on to
C) Unopened cases from years past that will most likely NEVER be opened.

A: No. Really. I do believe I can account for all my stuff.

B: Covered with the likes of "Ghosts of Mars" and other assorted crap that I like.

C: "Diary" and "Land" Blu-Rays remain unoponed and unwatched (although I have watched the DVD's that I bought before getting the Blu's) There is some stuff that I haven't got around to watching, but I will eventually

[LouCipherr]

Oh dear lord....

So, I was on another site and I happened across a post that was talking about Debbie Gibson turning 40... well, then I read this:

Despite recording the duet ‘Say Goodbye’ with JORDAN KNIGHT in 2006 – a song that peaked at number 24 in the Billboard Adult Contemporary chart – Gibson’s most prominent recent work amounts to co-starring with LORENZO LAMAS in the low-budget adventure film ‘Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus’. After the film’s trailer became an Internet sensation in 2009 – getting over one-million hits – the movie was officially released in May of the same year.

Following on from the success of ‘Megashark’, Gibson is set to appear in a forthcoming original movie entitled, ‘Mega Python vs Gatoroid’, which is due to be released in 2011. The film – which also stars American singer TIFFANY – will echo the action/sci-fi themes of ‘Megashark’.


NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! :lol: :lol:

What do they mean by the "success" of Megashark vs. Giant Octobpus? Fuck that, Sharktopus was a MUCH better movie. :p :lol:

[BillyRay]

Lou,

you might appreciate this, then:

ZQ-TmUg3w9o

[LouCipherr]

Lou,

you might appreciate this, then:

GIGGITY!! CAT FIGHT!! :lol:

[LouCipherr]

Just for a bit of nostalgia while we're talking Tiffany/Debbie Gibson.....


http://i38.photobucket.com/albums/e104/LouCipherr/Useless%20Shit/gibsontiffany.jpg

[AcesandEights]

We need a weekly, "I've shamed myself" thread from you, Lou. Each week, a new theme. Surely you can shame yourself a bit more on our account.

And no, I'm not kidding. :)

[LouCipherr]

What are you talking about, Aces? I shame myself on a DAILY BASIS! :lol: I just don't tell you guys about it! :p :D

[Mike70]

i stopped accusing people of shameful media acts right after my ex-wife found my stash of "manimal" episodes.

[MoonSylver]

i stopped accusing people of shameful media acts right after my ex-wife found my stash of "manimal" episodes.

:lol:

Everytime I hear "Manimal" I always think of this:

suZ230r03-g?version=3"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/suZ230r03-g?version=3" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="640" height="390"></object>

Not my favorite WASP song (yes I have one...) that might be this:

pxHl3gr-WMM?version=3"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/pxHl3gr-WMM?version=3" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="640" height="390"></object>

:thumbsup:

[LouCipherr]

Moon! You're into WASP?! Who would've thunk it.

Animal (I Fuck Like a Beast) was always a favorite of mine when I was younger. :D

[MoonSylver]

Moon! You're into WASP?! Who would've thunk it.

Animal (I Fuck Like a Beast) was always a favorite of mine when I was younger. :D

Oh I was a total metal head in High School. As I got older my tastes broadened out considerably. I don't listen to it as much as I used to, but I still like all the stuff now that I did back then. And Judas Priest RULES! That is all. :D

WhRCVm-1r2k?version=3"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/WhRCVm-1r2k?version=3" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="640" height="390"></object>

:lol:

[LouCipherr]

Heavy Metal Parking Lot was filmed at the Capitol Centre in Largo, Maryland on May 5th 1986 which is about 30 minutes from my house!!! I used to go there for ALL the big concerts in the 80's.

That is, until they leveled the place and made it into a shopping mall. :mad: An EXTREMELY sad day captured here:

6sRP3dAVKDo


Now I'm bummed just thinking about it. :(

[bassman]

What do they mean by the "success" of Megashark vs. Giant Octobpus? Fuck that, Sharktopus was a MUCH better movie. :p :lol:

Behold....Megashark vs. Crocosaurus!!! (http://www.joblo.com/arrow/index.php?id=25404)

Starring Steve Urkel, no less...

[LouCipherr]

Behold....Megashark vs. Crocosaurus!!! (http://www.joblo.com/arrow/index.php?id=25404)

Starring Steve Urkel, no less...

Oh dear god, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now once that comes out, I'll have to start another "I have shamed myself..." post. DAMMIT! I love this comment under the trailer:

"Goddamnit! Why can't Asylum burn to the ground already?! " :lol: :lol: :lol:

Where's 'Mega Python vs Gatoroid’ w/Debbie Gibson & Tiffany?! It's unacceptable that Megashark vs. Crocosaurus is being released first. :shifty: :lol:

[slickwilly13]

There is another movie coming out next month, I think. Swamp Shark

[LouCipherr]

There is another movie coming out next month, I think. Swamp Shark

What the fuck is it with Sharks lately? Didn't we get enough of that with Jaws, Jaws 2, Jaws 3D and Jaws The Revenge? :lol:

Fuck sharks, I wanna see MegaSquid vs. Giant Lobster! :lol: :D