You wake up and find you're the last person on earth...

[JDFP]

Hypothetical, because I think it's a fascinating thought (and I'm getting drunk too and want others enjoying my madness)...

You wake up to find you are the last living person on earth. Everyone else has just disappeared for some unknown reason. We'll make a few assumptions that electricity still works and that you won't die from nuclear power plants going on meltdown from running out of cooling water for the rods.

What do you do? Do you eventually break down into madness/schizophrenia ("Wilson! Come back!") or do you commit suicide? Do you lock yourself into a library? How do you handle this situation?

WWCHD: "What Would Charlton Heston Do?" :D

j.p.

[bassman]

Time Enough At Last
http://inlinethumb48.webshots.com/43247/2387343150100752951S425x425Q85.jpg


Seriously though, I imagine everyone would lose their marbles in this situation. I don't support suicide, but it might have to be forgiven under certain conditions...

[JDFP]

Time Enough At Last
http://inlinethumb48.webshots.com/43247/2387343150100752951S425x425Q85.jpg


Seriously though, I imagine everyone would lose their marbles in this situation. I don't support suicide, but in this situation it might have to be forgiven...

"No! It isn't fair! I had all the time I wanted and all the time I needed!" While I like the point the episode presents, I have to wonder how long ol' Burgess would have really made it being that he'd probably be dead within a week from radiation poisoning (and then there's that little nitpicky whole issue of food and water).

I think the prospect of surviving and being the last person on earth in a world of just yourself with everything as it was before is actually far more frightening. Cut off from human interaction (even those of us who don't like people) -- I'd say we all go nuts within a few weeks if not quicker.

j.p.

[bassman]

What about animals? With animals it might not be so bad. If animals are gone too, I imagine that next step would be the "Wilson" route you mentioned. Then a while after that you would probably sink into insanity and either live with it in crazy bliss, or go overboard with it and take your life.

No matter how mentally strong you are, I just can't imagine anyone being able to hold onto their sanity while being completely alone for an extended amount of time.

Perhaps 'Time Enough At Last' was a poor choice for this topic. The first episode, 'Where is Everybody?' would be a better fit...

http://thelongestlistofthelongeststuffatthelongestdomainn ameatlonglast.com/images4/twilightzone.jpg

[acealive1]

is the second one from the twilight zone too?

[bassman]

Yeah, it was the first episode aired. A guy loses his grip being alone in an empty town only to find out that it's actually a military experiment.

Small piece of trivia - the town he's alone in is actually the Universal back lot. Probably most famously known as Hill Valley from Back To The Future...

[MikePizzoff]

Small piece of trivia - the town he's alone in is actually the Universal back lot. Probably most famously known as Hill Valley from Back To The Future...

Being a huge BTTF fan, I could tell from the first moment I looked at the screen shot. Then I vaguely recalled this episode... but went on to envision Marty skitching past that building, with a bunch of women doing aerobics in 80's attire.

[bassman]

Being a huge BTTF fan, I could tell from the first moment I looked at the screen shot. Then I vaguely recalled this episode... but went on to envision Marty skitching past that building, with a bunch of women doing aerobics in 80's attire.

Yup. If i'm not mistaken... it's the workout place in the eighties, the diner in the fifties, and "Cafe 80's" in the future.

My wife likes to watch that "Ghost Whisperer" show and I noticed it was Hill Valley as well. The lots been used in tons of TV shows and movies. it's surprising how often I spot it being used given how it's now famously recognized as Hill Valley. It was also used in Eddie Murphy's classic film, Norbit. :lol:

[slickwilly13]

Hypothetical, because I think it's a fascinating thought (and I'm getting drunk too and want others enjoying my madness)...

You wake up to find you are the last living person on earth. Everyone else has just disappeared for some unknown reason. We'll make a few assumptions that electricity still works and that you won't die from nuclear power plants going on meltdown from running out of cooling water for the rods.

What do you do? Do you eventually break down into madness/schizophrenia ("Wilson! Come back!") or do you commit suicide? Do you lock yourself into a library? How do you handle this situation?

WWCHD: "What Would Charlton Heston Do?" :D

j.p.

My reaction would be, " Oh no, my precious Nataliya is dead!!! I didn't even get a chance to score!!! This fucking sucks!!!"

[Trin]

I'd log onto HPOTD and I'd get the last word in EVERY argument... I mean thread. Was Land before Day? No, it wasn't... and anyone who wants to say different is welcome to... but there's no one else. Was Survival a turd? Oh yes. No GAR fanboys left... except me. And I say what's good. Dawn '04 zombie baby was the worst thing ever. Yes it was. What a good post Trin.

I would start polls and win them EVERY TIME.

Over time I'd get lonely of course. And I'd create extra logon ids so I could banter with myself. I might have bassmant and clang_trin and jdft and aces_and_trin and such. And I'd make witty comments as each of these people and then counter them. I would set up extra computers with mannequins to be those people. It would be very realistic. Realistic is not insane. It's the opposite of insane. It's very sane.

Then the inevitable arguing would ensue. As it always does here. Bans would come out. I'd glare at the mannequins. We'd talk about the ones who were against us.

But we'd all have to simmer down when the next episodes of Walking Dead or such come out... which they would in my mind... and we'd discuss it like civilized idiots.

Yes, it would be great.

[Publius]

I'd log onto HPOTD and I'd get the last word in EVERY argument... I mean thread. Was Land before Day? No, it wasn't... and anyone who wants to say different is welcome to... but there's no one else. Was Survival a turd? Oh yes. No GAR fanboys left... except me. And I say what's good. Dawn '04 zombie baby was the worst thing ever. Yes it was. What a good post Trin.

I would start polls and win them EVERY TIME.

Over time I'd get lonely of course. And I'd create extra logon ids so I could banter with myself. I might have bassmant and clang_trin and jdft and aces_and_trin and such. And I'd make witty comments as each of these people and then counter them. I would set up extra computers with mannequins to be those people. It would be very realistic. Realistic is not insane. It's the opposite of insane. It's very sane.

Then the inevitable arguing would ensue. As it always does here. Bans would come out. I'd glare at the mannequins. We'd talk about the ones who were against us.

But we'd all have to simmer down when the next episodes of Walking Dead or such come out... which they would in my mind... and we'd discuss it like civilized idiots.

Yes, it would be great.

Winner!

(More) seriously, how would I know I was the last person on Earth? It's a pretty big place. Unless God Himself or one of his angels came down and told me I was the last person (and was darn convincing about it), I would probably believe that I couldn't be the only one, there must be someone else out there. Exploring the planet for other survivors might keep me sane.

[krakenslayer]

Probably get drunk, then fall and cut my hand, at which point I would become painfully aware that I know nothing about medicine. I would then attempt to stitch and bandage my hand while still half-blasted, but make a terrible mess of it. The hand would then get infected. Within two weeks I would have septacemia and within three I would be lying dead in a pool of my own bodily fluids, chewed at by rodents and stray cats.

[blind2d]

I would be happy. Would I change my routine? Of course! No more internet forums (I mean, what's the point by yourself? *Reads Trin's post* Haha, cool... not for me, though)... Definitely more "theft", if you can call it that... I'd stockpile food, hitting up the International Foods Market first (GrandMart, it's called. Great Ramyun and Naan)... I'd watch all those DVDs I've been putting off, thanks to distractions like this place... I'd take a day to finally learn how to fucking kickflip (and yeah, last time I tried it alone was about an hour of straight trying it and not getting it). I'd take a trip to the Capitol, to feel like Logan's Run... I might try to teach myself how to ride a motorcycle... I'd be fine alone, though. Sure I'd miss you lot and my family and everything, but hey, I've got a good imagination, y'know? Perishables before non-perishables... I'd try to get to California, or some place... find some ramps/pools to skate... Actually, I know of a couple good ramps in Maryland, so maybe I'd just hit those up... I'd definitely take the time to learn more 'valuable' skills as well, though... Sewing, cooking, hunting... I'd probably have to teach myself guns... First Aid... It would be exciting!

[AcesandEights]

I think it would be an inevitable down spiral, but I think the premise makes for a great writing exercise...it'd be nice to see what, if any, renditions could ultimately salvage either dignity or sanity for the protagonist in the long term.


I'd log onto HPOTD...

That read totally made my morning. :lol:

[Trin]

Glad I could make some people smile!!

Publius makes a great point. How would you know you were the last person on earth? Or is that part of your scenario JD, that we would know somehow?

Assuming you weren't absolutely for sure then I'd agree that the will to live would derive from searching for other humans. Setting up radios, searching for clues, leaving indications of life... driving my Escalade around with a banjo.

I think the will to live would override the isolation in any case. I can imagine a lot of time spent traveling and searching and playing with all the toys the rest of humanity left behind.

But then, I'm constantly surrounded by people and ready for a break.

To JDFP's opening, we have "some unknown reason." Fear of the unknown might cause you to limit how far you stray. It might also drive your search for answers.

The movie "The Quiet Earth" portrays this exact scenario. A man wakes up the sole person on earth. And we watch him dip in and out of insanity as he looks for signs of life.

Good thread to break up the dry run between zombie offerings!

[Mike70]

Time Enough At Last
http://inlinethumb48.webshots.com/43247/2387343150100752951S425x425Q85.jpg


Seriously though, I imagine everyone would lose their marbles in this situation. I don't support suicide, but it might have to be forgiven under certain conditions...

and here i was just about to make a joke about breaking my glasses.

on a serious note: it would be cool for a bit but even a loner like myself needs other folks from time to time.

[acealive1]

Yeah, it was the first episode aired. A guy loses his grip being alone in an empty town only to find out that it's actually a military experiment.

Small piece of trivia - the town he's alone in is actually the Universal back lot. Probably most famously known as Hill Valley from Back To The Future...


i'd love to see that episode some time. i pretty much grew up on the backlot living so close to it

[bassman]

i'd love to see that episode some time. i pretty much grew up on the backlot living so close to it

RaOGox1Un8c

You'll have to fast forward through Serling's intro as it's the original pilot version, but the entire episode is available through three youtube parts.

[acealive1]

:eek::eek:


thanks,bass!

[SymphonicX]

Three words for you:

POLICE EVIDENCE LOCKERS

I think I'd find a lifetime of fun in those places...

[bassman]

Three words for you:

POLICE EVIDENCE LOCKERS

I think I'd find a lifetime of fun in those places...

:lol:

A lifetime of fun or a short existence after you overdose on the stuff....

[Rancid Carcass]

C'mon let's be honest, the first thing most guys would do is find themselves an inflatable lady-friend... :shifty:

[slickwilly13]

C'mon let's be honest, the first thing most guys would do is find themselves an inflatable lady-friend... :shifty:

How about a multi-thousand dollar, life-like sex doll?

[Eyebiter]

Knock by Fredric Brown

"The last man on earth sat alone in a room. There was a knock on the door...."

(from the December 1948 issue of THRILLING WONDER STORIES).

[bassman]

How about a multi-thousand dollar, life-like sex doll?


Sex dolls are just creepy. If you're the last person on Earth, I doubt you would care much for any sort of sexual activity anyway. If you did, whats wrong with good ol masturbation? At least you'll have an unlimited supply of porn. :p

[blind2d]

See, this right here is why I need to make myself a "Listen to Bassman" t-shirt. Nail on the head.

[bassman]

See, this right here is why I need to make myself a "Listen to Bassman" t-shirt.

They're on sale now for the low, low price of 29.99. They also come with a WWBMD beanie. :p

[krakenslayer]

C'mon let's be honest, the first thing most guys would do is find themselves an inflatable lady-friend... :shifty:

With all the freshly dead bodies lying around, I don't think you'll need to go down the inflatable route. Not for a few weeks, at least. :p

[blind2d]

Ew, Kraken! You're gross! :P

[Danny]

STEP 1: find a trebuche. and a barbeque.
STEP 2: any large supermarket.
STEP 3: find the most expensive mansion you can find.
STEP 4: have one hell of an afternoon.

[MoonSylver]

See, this right here is why I need to make myself a "Listen to Bassman" t-shirt. Nail on the head.


They're on sale now for the low, low price of 29.99. They also come with a WWBMD beanie. :p

As famously seen here:

http://i1098.photobucket.com/albums/g374/moonsylver/WWBMD.jpg
;) :lol:

[White_Zombie]

I'd go to Area 51 and look for signs of extraterrestrials.
I'd go to Fort Knox and amass all the gold bars.
I'd drive a tank and tear threw neighborhoods for fun, crushing cars and blasting the big guns at houses.
I'd paint the white house pink and pimp it out to my specifications.
And after i get sick of all of that I'd hit the pharmacies and look for drugs of my desire and continue to get high as hell.
I could probably think or more but I'll get back to you, by the way make believe is sure fun as fuck dude. ;)

[SymphonicX]

Sex dolls are just creepy. If you're the last person on Earth, I doubt you would care much for any sort of sexual activity anyway. If you did, whats wrong with good ol masturbation? At least you'll have an unlimited supply of porn. :p

This makes no sense! I remember watching the Omega Man and thinking a similar thing - but with no actual REAL females around, and the knowledge that you're essentially bashing one off about a dead girl, do you think you could manage it? Knowing that ultimately, it'll never get better than the magazine you're looking at - and that person is long dead and all your chances of acting out this fantasy are beyond that of the normal impossibility of shagging a celeb...!?

I think I'd probably go crazy at that point.

And as for raiding pharmacies etc - well don't forget you'd probably go crazy on your own taking loads of chems without someone else to share the experience with...

Insanity would come sooo quickly...

so, police evidence lockers, blow some shit up, then off myself before insanity sets in...!

[ProfessorChaos]

i'd have a blast. catch up on some movies, games, books, etc. go on a cross-country road-trip, seeing all the sights i've never seen in the states, drive as fast as i'd like, run stop signs, blow things up, set things on fire, be perma-stoned off prescription pain-killers, etc.

i really don't think it'd be all that bad once you got used to it, and hopefully my little dog would be there to provide me with what little companionship i need.

oh, and moon, it's great to see you around here man.:)

[bassman]

As famously seen here:

http://i1098.photobucket.com/albums/g374/moonsylver/WWBMD.jpg
;) :lol:

:lol: That's the one. Been a best seller since 68...


I'd go to Area 51 and look for signs of extraterrestrials.
I'd go to Fort Knox and amass all the gold bars.
I'd drive a tank and tear threw neighborhoods for fun, crushing cars and blasting the big guns at houses.
I'd paint the white house pink and pimp it out to my specifications.
And after i get sick of all of that I'd hit the pharmacies and look for drugs of my desire and continue to get high as hell.
I could probably think or more but I'll get back to you, by the way make believe is sure fun as fuck dude. ;)

Great ideas! Well....except for Knox. They don't hold the gold anymore, do they?


This makes no sense! I remember watching the Omega Man and thinking a similar thing - but with no actual REAL females around, and the knowledge that you're essentially bashing one off about a dead girl, do you think you could manage it? Knowing that ultimately, it'll never get better than the magazine you're looking at - and that person is long dead and all your chances of acting out this fantasy are beyond that of the normal impossibility of shagging a celeb...!?


Let's be honest.....all of us have unknowingly had a wank to a dead pornstar. It's just a given. :p

It may not make sense to you, but to me it does. I would much rather have a quick release and go about my business than be thrusting a hunk of rubber made to look look like a whore. That's just pathetic dude. Even without anyone else around to find out about it...



Here's a funny one to ponder after all our answers - Somehow only HPotD regulars are the ones to survive. Now that would be interesting. :elol:

[Trin]

Sex dolls are just creepy. If you're the last person on Earth, I doubt you would care much for any sort of sexual activity anyway. If you did, whats wrong with good ol masturbation? At least you'll have an unlimited supply of porn. :pI don't see why I'd change what I do when I'm alone just becaues there are no people around. :p

[JDFP]

Oh good grief, I put up a sociological question as to how being the last person on earth would affect us and my thread degrades down into... yep, you guessed it, masturbation.

We all need to get out more often if that's the best thought we can have with the whole world being yours for the picking. :p

j.p.

[rongravy]

...whats wrong with good ol masturbation? At least you'll have an unlimited supply of porn. :p

And no one to come busting in on you when you're busting that nut.

[JDFP]

So, thus far, the results to this question have come down a few things:

-- Suicide
-- Lots of Traveling
-- Copious Amounts of Masturbation
-- Pharmacology Indulgence
-- Seeking Out Other People

As for me...

I'd probably be in a daze for a few days thinking: "The hell?" and wondering if I hadn't passed away in my sleep and awoken in some form of Purgatory to test my reaction to such an event. I'd probably become all metaphysical about the entire thing thinking I was dead and it was a test to prove the quality of my soul so I could move onward to a higher plain of existence.

I've never been one for traveling much -- just never really cared for travel. Basically everything I need is within 20 miles of my apartment. So, I'd probably spend the first few weeks getting drunk between intermittent sessions of passing out and still asking myself: "The hell?". After awhile I'd pick up a Franklin Covey planner and map out a regular daily routine (getting groceries, writing my thoughts and emotions to keep track of my language and writing abilities in a world where it isn't practiced regularly, etc.). The way I look at it is that if I can have a regular daily routine (as I do now) it will keep me, or at least prolong, the onslaught of schizophrenic tendencies ("Oh, the voices tell me to...") as well as keeping me somewhat in tune with myself and that Yes, Virginia, I still really exist.

I think for me, I can't speak for everyone else who has either offed themselves or is getting off on themselves, the biggest issue for me would be to ensure that I'm keeping a regular daily routine so I can stay somewhat sane for when the supernatural entities showed up to inform me I had passed their test.

j.p.

[Mr. Clean]

Day 1: Wake up...No one around to be seen....Walk around for awhile....Still no one around to be seen....Find something to eat....walk around some more....find more food....return home...secure house...sleep....

Day 2: Wake Up...find something to eat....find Guns....M24 w/ sling (http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/d/d0/PEO_M24_SWS.jpg/800px-PEO_M24_SWS.jpg), Remington 870 Super Shorty X2 w/ combat quick release chest slings (http://www.serbu.com/legacy/sus3s.jpg) stash LOADS of ammo (7.62, Buckshot, Turkey Load, Slugs) at home....Eat....Sleep....

Day 3 -10: .....Fix up defenses of House (Reinforced Doors...Fill in lower windows....ect)

Day 11-30: ....Load up on canned goods...fuel cans...other supplies...

Day 31: ...Find pain killers, beer, alcohol, tobacco and relax

If I woke up on the 32nd day...I'd probably go find me some sort of animal to kill so I could have a nice meal for the next week or so...Then I don't have a clue...Fix up my house and hoard supplies until I felt comfortable enough in case I had to lock myself in the house for whatever reason...Then I'd be burning everything in sight.

[ProfessorChaos]

I've never been one for traveling much -- just never really cared for travel. Basically everything I need is within 20 miles of my apartment. So, I'd probably spend the first few weeks getting drunk...

based on your posts in the past, i doubt there'd be enough beer in a 20-mile radius of your apartment to last you all that long.:)

and what's the deal, get tired of people making fun of your hat?

[JDFP]

based on your posts in the past, i doubt there'd be enough beer in a 20-mile radius of your apartment to last you all that long.:)

and what's the deal, get tired of people making fun of your hat?

Listen here, Bickle, if I want to change my avatar, I'll change my avatar. Now, I haven't done it in about 1,000 posts, so I figured, why the hell not? It's time for a change. I'm just turning in one hat for another with my hero Waylon Jennings (just as Bass has with Serling or other folks who change avatars more than post, though I'm fond of Chic's 'Snow' White).

Now if you want to cry about my changing of my avatar as a death of a tradition here at HPotD ("But we always knew JD would have this avatar!") I can understand your profound sadness at the loss of my avatar. But, I assure you, Prof, I have faith that you'll manage. Shit, I'll probably grow tired of being Waylon after awhile and change it back to my fedora avatar that everyone has grown so accustomed to as a fixture here. Just because everyone here is so bitterly jealous of my awesomeness doesn't mean I have to indulge them in their fancies. I think I'll dig being Waylon here for awhile.

As far as the beer ratio to drinking quota -- I'm only on my 14th or so Beast right now (Milwaukee's Best for the unwashed masses) and I'm feeling just peachy. I think there's enough grocery stores around here with the Beast to last me at least a good 3 weeks in an apocalyptic scenario before I'd have to venture outside of my comfort zone. God forbid there's anything that stand between me and my beer though apocalypse or not.

j.p.

[White_Zombie]

Great ideas! Well....except for Knox. They don't hold the gold anymore, do they?


No one really knows how much gold or if any gold is still at Fort.Knox, but they sure do have strict security measures at the depository. That tells me something worth while is in there to be guarded.

[blind2d]

I was thinking of changing my avatar, but... come on, it's Chuck from PSG as Noodle from Gorillaz (phase one). How could you improve on that?!
Oh yeah, beer. I'd totally drink some of that in the event of the Greatest Day Ever (aka, everyone-on-the-planet-dies-except-me day).
I suck...

[Danny]

i am shocked on a mostly american board that i am the only person thinking of having a totally rad barbecue before all that meat goes bad.

[ProfessorChaos]

Oh yeah, beer. I'd totally drink some of that in the event of the Greatest Day Ever (aka, everyone-on-the-planet-dies-except-me day).

congrats, pal, you just made my signature.


i am shocked on a mostly american board that i am the only person thinking of having a totally rad barbecue before all that meat goes bad.

are we assuming that all animals are dead as well, no electricity to keep existing meat stores, etc, or are you talking some cannibal hannibal shit?:shifty:

[Danny]

congrats, pal, you just made my signature.



are we assuming that all animals are dead as well, no electricity to keep existing meat stores, etc, or are you talking some cannibal hannibal shit?:shifty:

who cares? either way the local supermarkets full and its only gonna be good for another day or so, go to town y'know? :lol:

[rongravy]

Let's not forget the growing of your own weed. I guess you could hit some evidence rooms in a few good police stations, but eventually you will run out. I would. Thus the garden tending. And you could talk to the plants like they were people. Even put a hat on it, maybe a fake beard. Then cut it down and schmoke it.
After some odd years, you might get pretty darn good at growing.
End up with a green thumb, and Popeye sized forearms from all that whacking off...
Sweeeeet.

[Danny]

Let's not forget the growing of your own weed. I guess you could hit some evidence rooms in a few good police stations, but eventually you will run out. I would. Thus the garden tending. And you could talk to the plants like they were people. Even put a hat on it, maybe a fake beard. Then cut it down and schmoke it.
After some odd years, you might get pretty darn good at growing.
End up with a green thumb, and Popeye sized forearms from all that whacking off...
Sweeeeet.

not a smoker but would you run out? in a world after man wouldnt there be enough illegal grow operations and secret plantations to allow the marijuana plant to germinate and spread naturally in the ecosystem?

[Trin]

:p
i am shocked on a mostly american board that i am the only person thinking of having a totally rad barbecue before all that meat goes bad.
Problem is... here in America we have that totally rad barbecue EVERY SINGLE DAY already, beyotch!! :p:D;)

[rongravy]

not a smoker but would you run out? in a world after man wouldnt there be enough illegal grow operations and secret plantations to allow the marijuana plant to germinate and spread naturally in the ecosystem?

Yeah, but you need someone to tend to it, otherwise it'd all be shitty weed. Shitty and seedy as fuck.

[DjfunkmasterG]

I would probably spend my days high as a kite on Valium and Percocet because I would be raiding pharmacy after pharmacy, sleeping most of it away, amassing a Blu-Ray collection that would rival most cine-o-philes... Have me a collection of blow up dollies, you know, a new airhead every day. I would drive to DC and take a shit on the desk of every single republican lawmaker who ever graced the capitol.

Fun time...

And if I reach the point of total loneliness I would probably shoot myself in the melon.