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View Full Version : My latest debate with my wife.



Tied2thetracks
27-Jun-2006, 10:45 AM
A woman I work with was reponsible for a dunk driving accident where she killed two people by driving the wrong way on a highway 2:30am sunday morning. A very nice 32 year old lady who I've know for a few years and I never knew her to be a drunk (apparently this was DUI #4).

The argument was that I said I feel sorry for the woman, she is lookin g at at least 25 years in jail. I know it was her fault and people are dead because of her but I feel bad that a co-worker I consider a friend is going to prison.

Yes I feel worse for the two men that she killed families but do any of you think its wrong to feel bad for the criminal?

I was just curious what the general feeling is on sympoth for the criminal.

Kaos
27-Jun-2006, 12:22 PM
A woman I work with was reponsible for a dunk driving accident where she killed two people by driving the wrong way on a highway 2:30am sunday morning. A very nice 32 year old lady who I've know for a few years and I never knew her to be a drunk (apparently this was DUI #4).

The argument was that I said I feel sorry for the woman, she is lookin g at at least 25 years in jail. I know it was her fault and people are dead because of her but I feel bad that a co-worker I consider a friend is going to prison.

Yes I feel worse for the two men that she killed families but do any of you think its wrong to feel bad for the criminal?

I was just curious what the general feeling is on sympoth for the criminal.

You can feel as bad as you like, but if you think she deserves any kind of leniency then I would re-evaluate your motives if I were you. :rockbrow:

DjfunkmasterG
27-Jun-2006, 01:14 PM
The lady made a poor decision. A decision that she will have to live with for the rest of her life. You have every right to feel bad for her, and the victims. You know the woman personally so you have a closer connection to her. So I wouldn't be ashamed of feeling bad. Its human compassion and it is an emotion not many people share anymore.

LouCipherr
27-Jun-2006, 01:17 PM
Ditto. What Kaos said.

You know before you go out drinking what your limits are and if you'll be stuck driving yourself home or have a designated driver. KNOW YOUR LIMITS, and if you don't know your limits, then just plain don't bother.

I have zero sympathy for a person who gets drunk and gets behind the wheel of a car. It's irresponsible, stupid, and asking for trouble.

That being said, just about everyone who does drink has done this at one point in time or another - that doesn't mean it's right, I'm just sayin' it's something everyone has probably done at least once in their life. Since I don't drink (hey, I have other poisons, believe me, I'm not 'innocent' - I just don't drink alcohol - Dj will tell you) I've never done this before, but I'm sure the people who do, have. It's just the nature of the beast. "they" say "don't drink and drive" yet we're allowed to have bars on every street corner? WTF kinda logic is that?

As far as I'm concerned, if she caused an accident and killed 2 people and it was her FOURTH dui? She deserves to get thrown in jail and left there to rot, forever. If she's done it 4 times and got caught, how many other times has she done it and not got caught? She'll just keep repeating her stupid behaviour, possibly killing more people in the future... Personally, I think for killing 2 innocent people because of her stupidity she deserves the friggin' chair, but that's for another discussion.

Sorry, i'm not very sympathetic when it comes to drinking & driving. i can understand you feeling bad for her, but she deserves a severe punishment for her lack of judgement and actions.

LC

coma
27-Jun-2006, 03:00 PM
Of course , I think, it's OK to feel bad for her. Your friend made a terrible error and now is totally screwed. Her life is over. (you did know her. You can't control feelings)

But I wouldn't call it a mistake. 4 Duis. Its not like she had a buzz and it may be debatable that the accident was from alcohol and she doesn't drive drunk usually. You have to be super uper duper hammered to drive on the wrong side of the road. Like 12 beers hammered.

I think you didn't know here even close to how much you thought. I wonder if she got locked up at all before. In NY you would definately do at a minimum 15 days in county. And they take your car on you 1st one. I think with 3rd you get liscence revoked.

p2501
27-Jun-2006, 03:44 PM
You can feel as bad as you like, but if you think she deserves any kind of leniency then I would re-evaluate your motives if I were you. :rockbrow:


you totally nailed it.

bravo!:)

the fact is this was the fourth time she got CAUGHT. not the fouth time she's ever driven drunk. this really should be a captial case in all honesty.

MapMan
27-Jun-2006, 05:23 PM
Don't debate with the wife. Are freakin crazy ? Dude be a spineless man. You know you can't win. You are only making hard on yourself. Talk to your buddys and lie like a dog about how you are going to tell her what you think. Then lie to her and tell her she is right. It's the only way!!! YOU WILL LOSE. WE ALL KNOW THIS!!! Say what you will about how you are the man of the house ect etc etc blah blah blah. We know the truth. On a side note I am sorry about your friend. She did break the law and it killed people and she should be punished.

bassman
27-Jun-2006, 05:27 PM
It's the same with any close friend or relative in any situation....

It sucks, I know....but that doesn't change the fact that it was a stupid decision. I think it's safe to say that everyone has been in a similar situation with a friend.

Just wish her luck and be there for her, man. And give her some window love when you go to visit.:p

kortick
28-Jun-2006, 01:20 AM
feeling bad for her is perfectly fine

it is a terrible situation for all involved

she will get her punishment
but it will do no good for the
people that were hurt

nobody can tell you how you should feel

if you felt no sympathy for her at all
it would be just as acceptable
you are entitled to your feelings

AcesandEights
28-Jun-2006, 01:50 AM
Feeling sympathy for someone with whom you share a proximal level of cordiality is natural.

Just leave the toilet seat down more, and the wife will not be so picky :evil: