Bar bans man with frequent flatulence

[Tied2thetracks]

http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=54888

[capncnut]

Durty Bastah. :D

[MikePizzoff]

:lol: That's the funniest story I've read all day.

[capncnut]

Raab C. Nesbit anyone? :D

[DeadJonas190]

That is hillarious!

Is it a real story though, it reads like something out of a tabloid.

[MinionZombie]

:lol:

LOVE IT!

Nothing like a good fart story ... now I enjoy a fart as much as the next bloke, positively rejoice in it, but I know when and when not to let go a guffty...that bloke was just being a dick ... and look at his picture, lol, geeeeeeez!

Somehow though, I think breathing in a pubfull of lingering smoke is worse for you, technically, than a cloud of fart-fug hanging around some wonkey-eyed Scotsman...mind you, if it really reeks, you don't want the guy hanging around, cos some farts are foul.

I've got nothing against the sound of farting, it's the smell that's a problem, fortunately I can fart without stench most of the time, so it's all comic toilet humour ... but I'd better not step foot in that pub after having had a bowl of raisins, ho-no! :lol:

Nothing like some toilet humour to start the day...

[DjfunkmasterG]

If your whole ambition in life is to go to the pub and blast ass just to see how many people it clears out, then you have a serious mental issue. By the looks of the guy in the picture, he doesn't look normal so they at the bar should have expected him to not act normal. :rolleyes:

[Danny]

*contributes nothing, merely sits at his desk and gigles like a retard*:lol:

[coma]

If your whole ambition in life is to go to the pub and blast ass just to see how many people it clears out, then you have a serious mental issue. By the looks of the guy in the picture, he doesn't look normal so they at the bar should have expected him to not act normal. :rolleyes:
If you kicked out all the wierdos, subtards and social retards from any bar you will have no patrons. I Bartended for a while and thats a fact. however, if you bother people you get 86'd

That farty man is one of those guys who blasts out then stinkys then denies it everytime. In this case I believe the owner. If you have had to tell someone to stop the beefaroni numerous times they are nasty.
I had a friend in junior high that would take flatulence pills so he could fart all day. He'd say "farting is natural." to which I retorted "Not if you take pills. Do you not like girls or something, jackass"

[HLS]

poor guy!

That got me thinking of my ex husband. He used to pass gass all the time and it was real rank. I remember he did it once as he was exiting an elevator in a hospital right before a little old lady walked in and you can hear her cussing in the elevator lol

[DVW5150]

Hops & Barley cause gas ... onions too . Forget it if he has had chili .:lol:

[capncnut]

Heinz baked beans, the worst. Especially curried. :D

[HLS]

Hops & Barley cause gas ... onions too . Forget it if he has had chili .:lol:

What really gives me gas, and I can not believe I am admitting this, is dried apricots. I ate a whole bag once before work and I was farting all day for hours. It was so embarrassing. I had enough gas to power a small city for a day. lol:eek:

[MinionZombie]

I had a friend in junior high that would take flatulence pills so he could fart all day. He'd say "farting is natural." to which I retorted "Not if you take pills. Do you not like girls or something, jackass"

FARTING PILLS???!!! :eek:

Smell & Noise, or just one of them at a time? :p

Farting is best left to skilled professionals like myself, natural means ... farting pills is like the steroids of the farting game. :D

I'm all noise mostly, but can funk out the place with the best of them now and then ... my main skill is belching, I can rift with the best of them.

[Dtothe3]

Belching is my specialty too :) Although if I start farting people know to avoid the bathroom. Means a big **** is coming :elol:

[Bongholio]

Why fart 'n waste it when you can burp and taste it?

[DjfunkmasterG]

Hops & Barley cause gas ... onions too . Forget it if he has had chili .:lol:

Chilli is the worst.

BTW didn't know you lived in Silver Spring DVW 5150... I am in Germantown. :D

[coma]

FARTING PILLS???!!! :eek:

Smell & Noise, or just one of them at a time? :p

Farting is best left to skilled professionals like myself, natural means ... farting pills is like the steroids of the farting game. :D

I'm all noise mostly, but can funk out the place with the best of them now and then ... my main skill is belching, I can rift with the best of them.
People take fart pills after stomach etc surgery to clear out the gas. He had a bunch and the beefs were "authentic" in every way. Naaaaasty!:lol:

[MinionZombie]

People take fart pills after stomach etc surgery to clear out the gas. He had a bunch and the beefs were "authentic" in every way. Naaaaasty!:lol:
*shudder* ewww dude ... still though, chemical persuasion, I call "cheater" on him! :D

Bong - but a fart isn't wasted either, cos you can smell it, and even taste it if the smell is potent enough (why you'd want to, I duno), plus I'd say farts and funnier than belches...although a constant stream of belches is rather funny and cracks me up something chronic between rifts.

[coma]

*shudder* ewww dude ... still though, chemical persuasion, I call "cheater" on him! :D

Bong - but a fart isn't wasted either, cos you can smell it, and even taste it if the smell is potent enough (why you'd want to, I duno), plus I'd say farts and funnier than belches...although a constant stream of belches is rather funny and cracks me up something chronic between rifts.
One day Me and my friend were in lunch break at school and we were acting stupid as kids do. A lunch monitor came over to tell us to stop. He did the fake finger gun thing. When he pulled the thumb trigger he let out an earthquake fart. He had to go to the principal and was getting suspended. His mo went to the school to defend her son
"You cant suspend him, Its NATURAL!"
She argued so long the principal gave up and let him back in school

[capncnut]

Bong - but a fart isn't wasted either, cos you can smell it, and even taste it if the smell is potent enough...
Well there's a lot of truth to that MZ. A friend of mine told me that his late mother, who had no sense of smell, could always tell when he farted by tasting it. I never thought to ask him if knew what the flavour was though. :barf:

[MinionZombie]

Now that's a parent, defending their son's comically timed farting. :cool:

[Bongholio]

since I went to eyebiter's linked night of the comet site,...
where they expose that the next day that it was not an event in layers of the atmosphere from the comet but the dust of all the worlds people who
got zapped by the comet (why the sky was pink) and SHOCK they were breathing them@ lol
Since that hasn't happened you can always go to Mexico city to inhale some
human feces (or taste it like granny did) as a substitute.

[coma]

Now that's a parent, defending their son's comically timed farting. :cool:
She was cool as hell. Her and her husdand. They used to let us burn doobies in his room and pretend to not notice. Like a detante or dont ask dont tell. If we try to hide it, they leave us alone. NY cops used to be like that with bud until Guiliani. Thanks Rudy you twat. If he gets to be prez we are in big trouble