The Repercussions of the "Purina Diet"

[LouCipherr]

I have a Border Collie and I was buying a large bag of Purina dog food at the store. I'm standing there in the check out line and the woman behind me asked if I had a dog. (Duh!) On impulse, I told her no, I was starting the "Purina Diet" again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital the last time - but I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

Practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me.

I told her "No, I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me"

:D

[DVW5150]

LMAO ... Did the lady cashier have a pocket-protector?'Tis very funny indeed.

[Terran]

This story is told so many times.....whered you first hear it from...

[LouCipherr]

From a post on another forum. It was so funny I had to post it. :D

[DjfunkmasterG]

I posted this sometime ago... I think on the old forum or maybe this one in General discussion. It is a great joke, but has to be done in the first person. Saying up front you found it on a forum takes the fun out of it. :D

[LouCipherr]

What he said. *points to Dj* :D

[Debbieangel]

>stands up from spraying soda all over monitor<
I love this joke!!LOL
I hadn't heard this one in a long time..thanks MZ I needed a laugh today!
Oh it made it funnier cause I am on a diet!:p
People on diets always look for that miracle way of losing the pounds faster and less painful to our eating habits! LOL
Ya dogfood I will go right out and buy some right now..ooh wait a minute would kibbles work? LOL
That would be a good joke to play on someone!

[DjfunkmasterG]

MZ?

You mean Lou Cipherr right?:D

[LouCipherr]

You mean Lou Cipherr right?:D

LouCipherr - no space between the two. :D

[Debbieangel]

MZ?

You mean Lou Cipherr right?:D
woah sorry LOU!!! I saw I am Zombie and MZ's name stuck in my head. soo GOOD JOKE LOU!!!
There DJ forgiven? lol

[LouCipherr]

:lol:

no sweat. As long as you found it funny, it's all good. :D

[Debbieangel]

:lol:

no sweat. As long as you found it funny, it's all good. :D

:p Hey I just got new glasses too, now what is my excuse..and dont you dare say old age!!!!:p lol

[LouCipherr]

:p Hey I just got new glasses too, now what is my excuse..and dont you dare say old age!!!!:p lol

Ummm... uuuhhhhh... welll....

*runs and hides due to lack of an answer*

:lol:

[Debbieangel]

http://www.elks590.org:80/main/cooltest.htm

Lou ... LOL I dont blame you !!
Check out the joke ..see if you are cool person or not? I just got it in an email from my hubby then you will see why I am the way I am! LOL:D

[Cody]

I was wondering why that sounded so familiar

[LouCipherr]

Check out the joke ..see if you are cool person or not? I just got it in an email from my hubby then you will see why I am the way I am! LOL:D

Looks like I'm still a dork. :lol: :lol:

I can live with that. :D

[fartpants]

hey don't knock it , dorks will inherit the earth one day ( just look at Bill Gates )

[LouCipherr]

woohoo! That means I have a lot to look forward to! :lol: