Haiku of the Dead

[clanglee]

Under the advice of another member here, I have decided to start a Haiku Thread. Leave your Haikus here. Anything will do, as long as it has to do with zombies, GAR, or how wonderful I am.:D
For those that are unaware, a haiku is a short japanese poem. Three lines long. The first line has 5 syllables, the second has 7, and the last has 5 again. Thems the rulez. Have fun.

I'll start things off shall I?

Ah, George Romero!
Your films are so wonderful.
Zombies are so cool!

[Yojimbo]

I was taught haiku by a buddhist monk when I was very young. If he were here today he would kick my ass for this but here goes:

Richard Rubenstein
You are such a effing jerk!
Why don't you blow me?

[RustyHicks]

Dawn of the dead
is the best,
head and shoulders
above all the rest.

Corny but best I can do :)

[clanglee]

Richard Rubenstein
You are such a effing jerk!
Why don't you blow me?

Not a Dawn'04 fan I guess?


Dawn of the dead
is the best,
head and shoulders
above all the rest.

Corny but best I can do :)

A+ for effort man!!

[Yojimbo]

Yeah, didn't mind Dawn 04 as a zombie film in general (with the exception of the violations of Romero's rules with the running zombie, and the zombie virus) but offended that they called it Dawn of the Dead. It was NOT worthy, and Rubenstein can kiss my behind.

The first line of my Haiku, in this regard, could have just as easily read
"Zachary Snyder"

[RustyHicks]

Dawn remake blows,
it's all a scam, but
George will always be the man

[Cody]

I know the perfect person for this thread! I just cant think of his name, he writes like this:

I sat outside on a bench today
it was quite nice actually
a dog came up a piddled on the tree
next to me

anyone know who im talking about??

[clanglee]

e.e.cummings? dunno.

here's another one:

The recently dead
are munching on human flesh.
Shoot them in the head.

[Cody]

Kortick! thats who I was thinking of..

[MissJacksonCA]

I was taught haiku by a buddhist monk when I was very young. If he were here today he would kick my ass for this but here goes:

Richard Rubenstein
You are such a effing jerk!
Why don't you blow me?

oh my god ... so funny... noice

[MikePizzoff]

Dawn of the dead
is the best,
head and shoulders
above all the rest.


:lol::lol::lol:

The dead craving flesh;
Ripping your entrails from your
Body as you scream

[clanglee]

Shambling corpses come
walking slowly up to me.
I run like a bitch.

[Philly_SWAT]

Monroeville Mall's big
The four stayed hidden awhile
The zeds rule again

[jdog]

smell of rotting flesh
a million damed souls walk on
it is a dead place


all on my own now.
used to be fifteen of us.
taken by dead hands.

just a stab at it. never tried this since grade school.

[clanglee]

smell of rotting flesh
a million damed souls walk on
it is a dead place


all on my own now.
used to be fifteen of us.
taken by dead hands.

just a stab at it. never tried this since grade school.

Awesome man!!:D

[Yojimbo]

smell of rotting flesh
a million damed souls walk on
it is a dead place


all on my own now.
used to be fifteen of us.
taken by dead hands.

just a stab at it. never tried this since grade school.

I liked the others, but this one is my favorite so far.

[Dr. Pus]

Ok, y'all don't know me well yet, but you will, oh yes you will. I have a podcast called "Library of the Living Dead" and one of the segments is called "Putrified Poetry". We did a large segment on zombie haikus and it was very popular. Soooo, may I read the above haikus on my podcast?

Of if y'all get a hankering for writing Zombie Poetry of even Zombie Limericks I'd love to read those too.


Thanks,

Dr. Pus

[AcesandEights]

Thread necromancy.
It can strike without warning,
Endangering all.

[jdog]

all surrounded now.
have only six bullets left.
must save one for me.

the moans haunt my dreams
like a nightmare that won't end.
when will i wake up

his dead eyes look on.
on the hunt for some fresh meat.
must stay out of site.

a few more to add to the list hope you enjoy.

[clanglee]

J-Dog. You should write a zombie saga in haiku. Sorta like a really weird Beowolf. That would be awsome.

Pus, mine suck, but you have my permission to use em.

[jdog]

J-Dog. You should write a zombie saga in haiku. Sorta like a really weird Beowolf. That would be awsome.

Pus, mine suck, but you have my permission to use em.

thats a sweet idea. i think i might try that. it will give me a new project to work on and woulds be an original way to tell a story. im gla you liked the ones i wrote thanks for the support.

panic in the streets.
we must find a place to go.
escape from the dead.

silence fills the air.
the dead have taken over.
mankind is no more.

this is a set of haiku's that run together in a story.

first reports come in.
they say the dead are walking.
so hard to belive.

stay in doors they say.
find a weapon and stay quite.
it will all blow over.

i'm so scared. what to do?
zombies in my own backyard.
have to make a move.

all alone with this.
have to look after myself.
I must stay alert.

ready to go now.
one gun and sixty bullets.
need to find some food.

left once it got dark.
got past the ones in the yard.
now where do I go?

I can hear the dead.
thier around every corner.
must stay out of sight.

I can feel a tug
icy fingers grab my arm.
I fight to escape.

hammer to the head.
direct hit, the goul go's down.
must get out of here.

thats all i have for now. just a little somwthing i was messing around with last night. hope you enjoy.

[clanglee]

Very nice.


100th post here!! Yay me!! :D:D:D

[jdog]

Very nice.


100th post here!! Yay me!! :D:D:D

glad you like them. congrats on you 100 post to man nice to see peaple talking about the dead.:D

[Yojimbo]

thats a sweet idea. i think i might try that. it will give me a new project to work on and woulds be an original way to tell a story. im gla you liked the ones i wrote thanks for the support.

panic in the streets.
we must find a place to go.
escape from the dead.

silence fills the air.
the dead have taken over.
mankind is no more.

this is a set of haiku's that run together in a story.

first reports come in.
they say the dead are walking.
so hard to belive.

stay in doors they say.
find a weapon and stay quite.
it will all blow over.

i'm so scared. what to do?
zombies in my own backyard.
have to make a move.

all alone with this.
have to look after myself.
I must stay alert.

ready to go now.
one gun and sixty bullets.
need to find some food.

left once it got dark.
got past the ones in the yard.
now where do I go?

I can hear the dead.
thier around every corner.
must stay out of sight.

I can feel a tug
icy fingers grab my arm.
I fight to escape.

hammer to the head.
direct hit, the goul go's down.
must get out of here.

thats all i have for now. just a little somwthing i was messing around with last night. hope you enjoy.

Dude!

J-Dog, you rule! Nice, scary-ass haiku there, among the best I have read (and I am an Asian!)

All hail J-Dog!

[jdog]

Dude!

J-Dog, you rule! Nice, scary-ass haiku there, among the best I have read (and I am an Asian!)

All hail J-Dog!

thanks man. im glad you lie them. i have a bunch more to go with the story that i will post later tonight when i get home from work. i also have a few storys im working on hope to post them soon. thanks again for the suport yojimbo.:elol:

[ZombieGrrL]

Here's my contribution..... :)

"Try to be silent
They must have heard my footsteps
Now, I'm an undead"

"Running out of food
Another night in hiding
Will we survive this?"

"I'm grabbed from behind
Quickly I pull the trigger
Another close call"

"She cries from the pain
He knows what he has to do
She falls to the floor"

[Yojimbo]

Here's my contribution..... :)

"Try to be silent
They must have heard my footsteps
Now, I'm an undead"

"Running out of food
Another night in hiding
Will we survive this?"

"I'm grabbed from behind
Quickly I pull the trigger
Another close call"

"She cries from the pain
He knows what he has to do
She falls to the floor"



Nice one ZombieGrrl. Scary!

I had forgotten how cool this thread was!:)

[clanglee]

Yeah, I think this was the first thread I ever started. Nice to see it come back from the dead. :D

[ZombieGrrL]

Thanks Yojimbo... :)

Great thread clanglee - I like to resurrect old threads! Stops my necromancing skills from becoming rusty! :D

[jdog]

i have some new ones that i will post soon. i would do it now but im at work.

[Yojimbo]

Sure do miss those freaky Jdog haikus, so looking forward to the next series of posts.

[clanglee]

J-Dog is the king
of the haiku don't you know.
Get with it my man!!

[clanglee]

This thread is quite dead.
But with a wave of my hand.
Thread Necromancy.

:D

[Bub666]

I was taught haiku by a buddhist monk when I was very young. If he were here today he would kick my ass for this but here goes:

Richard Rubenstein
You are such a effing jerk!
Why don't you blow me?


:lol::lol::lol:

[zombie_weasil]

some of this is like reading death metal lyrics. Haha.

[Mike70]

a car discovered,
alpha testicles heaving,
woman satisfied.


not exactly zombie but i couldn't stop myself.

[Yojimbo]

Gnarly!

I had forgotten how cool this thread was. Thanks Clang! Glad to see this one back from the dead.

Jdog, where the hell are you? This thread needs more of your magic!

[clanglee]

Yeah. . .I havn't seen JDog in quite a while. . .:(

[Yojimbo]

Yeah. . .I havn't seen JDog in quite a while. . .:(

The wordsmith J-Dog,
Lost somewhere in cyberspace.
Where did you go, Dude?

We miss you, brother
Both Clanglee and Yojimbo
await your return.

[Trin]

Romero zombies
Dead bodies become smarter?
Oh how things have changed...

[ZombieGrrL]

Romero zombies
Dead bodies become smarter?
Oh how things have changed...LOL I love it

Slow or fast Zomibies...
Which ones do you like better?
The jury is out...

Bang. What was that noise?
The zombies walk the hallway.
No where to run! Dead.

[Yojimbo]

LOL I love it

Slow or fast Zomibies...
Which ones do you like better?
The jury is out...

Bang. What was that noise?
The zombies walk the hallway.
No where to run! Dead.


Right on!:hyper:

[clanglee]

Romero zombies
Dead bodies become smarter?
Oh how things have changed...

:lol::lol::lol:

I'm happy I resurrected this thread. :D

[Yojimbo]

Just a "bump" to the top again, because this thread rules!

[ZombieGrrL]

Zombies. Are they real?
Have to prepare - just in case.
It might happen soon!

Come on guys, more Haiku LOL

[jdog]

the jdog is back!
he has been away to long.
back to talk some dead.

hey guys good to be back. i have been away and working on a few projects (writing, short-film) but hope to be on the boards more often. im glad my haiku's are still being enjoyed. should have more for you by tonight.

[clanglee]

Welcome back JDog!!!!! Awesome!! Let the badass Haikus commence.

[jdog]

i just wrote a few quick ones for the thread. hope you enjoy.

stinging bite of teeth.
the fleash tearing from my arm.
my fate is sealed.

stillness fills the air.
six months now and still just me.
why should i go on?

fleeing the city.
fuel tank is showing empty.
time to start praying.

hope you enjoy cause im a little rusty

[ZombieGrrL]

Excellent haiku jdog & welcome back! :)

[AcesandEights]

Ever hungry hordes
Slack jawed, gray faces of doom
Never stop...ever.

[ZombieGrrL]

Excellent AcesandEights! :skull:

[JasonEdw]

Blue Krishna zombie
over-acting nurse zombie
Brains are good eatin'

[Yojimbo]

i just wrote a few quick ones for the thread. hope you enjoy.

stinging bite of teeth.
the fleash tearing from my arm.
my fate is sealed.

stillness fills the air.
six months now and still just me.
why should i go on?

fleeing the city.
fuel tank is showing empty.
time to start praying.

hope you enjoy cause im a little rusty

Good to see you back, Homeboy J-Dog, you were missed. Nice haikus, there!

[blind2d]

Not necromantic, I hope?

Stillness in the air
Silence save for labored breath
Is salvation near?

[Yojimbo]

Glad to see this thread return from the dead.

[clanglee]

Yo, did you see the other Haiku thread? apparently someone has a zombie Haiku book out. Wonder if it's J-dog in diguise

[Yojimbo]

Yo, did you see the other Haiku thread? apparently someone has a zombie Haiku book out. Wonder if it's J-dog in diguise


I did see that. Pretty funny stuff.

Dude, I checked out their website. Some critic is quoted on the front page of the website saying that the zombie haiku was a unique idea and was one of the only corners of the zombie genre that has not yet been done. If it is anyone other than J-Dog, then I can't help but feel like someone came here and saw your thread and then ripped off your idea, Clang.

[ZombieGrrL]

Well clanglee's original thread has a timestamp in 2007 so unless they can prove it was before then, pfft!

Keep going with the haiku! :) love them!

[clanglee]

Just saw a new book
it's haiku about zombies
where have I seen that?

[AcesandEights]

D'oh! We need to hop on these ideas faster and make our bucks, people!

Implacable foe
fiendishly preying on us.
Capitalism.

But never tell Ned I said it :)

[clanglee]

I found this old thread,
all about zombie haiku.
Thought I would bump it.

[Trin]

Oh please lord spare me
Haiku of the dead sucks ass
Someone please ban clang

[clanglee]

Trin is just jealous
His mother likes me better
She said so last night

[Trin]

Trin's mom is deceased
someone loves dead things too much
TMI clanglee

[clanglee]

Now it all makes sense
I really was wondering
why she just lay there.


:o

[MikePizzoff]

I believe I just thought of the ULTIMATE zombie haiku!!!:

David Emgee with
Gaylen Ross and Ken Foree.
Scott Reiniger, too.

YES!!!

[Trin]

@clang

zombie mom felt bad
for your inadequacy
such small human flesh

[blind2d]

the moist towellette
clinging to sensitive place
removed by zombie

crap, I know, but that first line has been in my head for so long....

[clanglee]

damn you're good. . . .this can only end badly my friend. . .

Terribly sorry
Your mother was mistaken
That was your brother


the moist towellette
clinging to sensitive place
removed by zombie

crap, I know, but that first line has been in my head for so long....

ewwwww man

[Trin]

@ clanglee - hat's off to you too sir. I've never had a haiku zombie mom smackoff before...

Perhaps for the sake of the sensibilities of the other fine members of this board we should call it a draw? Maybe one final smack each??

...

my mistake my friend
that was my brother you felt
sandwiched between you

:lol::lol::lol::lol:

[Yojimbo]

As an Asian, I declare the haiku battle between clang and trin a draw!

Funny skirmishes
Humorous bullets fired
with no clear winner

[clanglee]

Yeah Trin I got nothin'. . . . That last one is so overpowering, it is almost unrespondable. I bow to your abilities sir. . . .:D

Your brother was where?
In between us? You don't say.
Man his ass is tight.



oh. . eww. . I think I threw up in my mouth a little there

[Eyebiter]

Zombies walk among
both the living and the dead
where is your God now?

[mista_mo]

The Brownies are good
That fat old bastard had said
Time to have a crump

[blind2d]

My fluids draining
Pulse and breathing slower now
What is that there light?

[Yojimbo]

Zombies walk among
both the living and the dead
where is your God now?
Me likey!

[Spider Rico]

Just got bit today
There won't be a tomorrow
I sit here and wait

[MikePizzoff]

Just got bit today
There won't be a tomorrow
I sit here and wait

That's pretty good...

...but not as good as THIS!



David Emgee with
Gaylen Ross and Ken Foree.
Scott Reiniger, too.


Sorry, guys, I'm drunk and damn proud.

[Trin]

As Cartman would say,
Lay off the cough syrup man.
(Ok, it was good)

[clanglee]

Staying silent now
My breath caught behind my lips.
Dear God, they found me.

[blind2d]

I hear something close
It beckons to me softly
The scent of new prey

[Spider Rico]

Former loved ones walk
I don't have the heart to shoot
Only that to run

[mista_mo]

Crimson stains her gown
gets back up for one last time
I'll always love you

Reaching blindly now
The cold dark getting closer
Why did I do it?

[AcesandEights]

Thread necromancy.
It can strike without warning,
Endangering all.

Damn! I'm fucking smart!
Zombies got nothin' on me.
That is, till they bite.

[clanglee]

Damn! I'm fucking smart!
Zombies got nothin' on me.
That is, till they bite.

You sure are Aces.
A sure fire Nostrodamus.
Predicting and such.

[Trin]

Crying... pleading... screams...
Reach my ears through the door
Tries to block them out

Clawing... begging... moans...
Nothing I could do for them
I try to believe

[blind2d]

Ignorance is bliss
So they say, but what's this thing
Chewing off my arm?

[clanglee]

Crying... pleading... screams...
Reach my ears through the door
Tries to block them out

Clawing... begging... moans...
Nothing I could do for them
I try to believe

Good stuff Trin.:D


Ignorance is bliss
So they say, but what's this thing
Chewing off my arm?

:lol::lol::lol:
Love it

[Mike70]

Crimson stains her gown
gets back up for one last time
I'll always love you


great one, chris. i think this is one of the most best haikus in this thread. nice job.

[mista_mo]

Bump this mother fuck
Time for a new haiku man
Big Bubbly titties


Look at all this hair
My shoulders and back covered
woman don't like me

[ZombieGrrL]

Keep em coming guys, love this thread!!!!

[blind2d]

Eyeball rolling down
Ten steps far, now twenty-three
The other one's green

[clanglee]

Awwww. . .I love it when this thread gets bumped. . . . makes a father proud it does. . .:)

Handfull of its hair
The gun is just out of reach
Risk letting it go?

[Trin]

An age old thread rises
A remembrance of things once born
within clanglee's loins

[clanglee]

strange you should say that.
Because from my fiery loins,
stranger things have sprung:D

[Trin]

I can believe that.
Such as a spoon in the ass?
That would be stranger.

[ProfessorChaos]

world war z movie...
what the fuck is going on?
...need a new dead film:|

[jdog]

the JDOG is back.
with haikus to chill your blood.
about fucking time

hows it going everyone im back to add a few new ones to the list. sorry i have been gone so long but i am a busy dude. i see that a book has been made about zombie haikus but i wasnt me that did it. i hope they didnt ripp off this thread for the idea.

left alone to die.
infection mixes with blood.
hunger starts to grow.

moans fill the city.
an army of the dead roam.
all in search of meat.

i hope you enjoyed the new ones i will write more soon.

[Yojimbo]

the JDOG is back.
with haikus to chill your blood.
about fucking time

hows it going everyone im back to add a few new ones to the list. sorry i have been gone so long but i am a busy dude. i see that a book has been made about zombie haikus but i wasnt me that did it. i hope they didnt ripp off this thread for the idea.

left alone to die.
infection mixes with blood.
hunger starts to grow.

moans fill the city.
an army of the dead roam.
all in search of meat.

i hope you enjoyed the new ones i will write more soon.


My brother J! Nice to hear from you again!

Dude, I find it hard to believe that they did not rip from this thread. Bastards!

[MikePizzoff]

What would Les Stroud do
If there were a world of zeds?
He would survive, man.

[Yojimbo]

Return once again,
to Clanglee's thread, our Jdog
a son prodigal



WELCOME BACK BROTHER

---------- Post added at 10:18 PM ---------- Previous post was at 10:15 PM ----------


I can believe that.
Such as a spoon in the ass?
That would be stranger.


:lol:
Fucking litterally LOL:lol:

---------- Post added at 10:22 PM ---------- Previous post was at 10:18 PM ----------


Ok, y'all don't know me well yet, but you will, oh yes you will. I have a podcast called "Library of the Living Dead" and one of the segments is called "Putrified Poetry". We did a large segment on zombie haikus and it was very popular. Soooo, may I read the above haikus on my podcast?

Of if y'all get a hankering for writing Zombie Poetry of even Zombie Limericks I'd love to read those too.


Thanks,

Dr. Pus

Wondering, did Dr. Pus ever read this on his podcast - or was he the dude that published that thing?

[deadpunk]

There is no flesh here
the living have all fallen
how can the dead rise?

[Wyldwraith]

Inevitable
Death respecting no station
Equalizes all
-----------------------------

Fascination with
Ghoulish Apocalypses
As zombies prevail
-----------------------------

Survival Horror
My macabre love of chaos
Spawned by the undead
-----------------------------

Runner Heresy
A pox upon the genre
Curse you Zach Snyder

[Yojimbo]

Inevitable
Death respecting no station
Equalizes all
-- ---------------------------

Fascination with
Ghoulish Apocalypses
As zombies prevail
-----------------------------

Survival Horror
My macabre love of chaos
Spawned by the undead
-----------------------------

Runner Heresy
A pox upon the genre
Curse you Zach Snyder
Ultimate coolness.:)

[clanglee]

Some people ask me
"Why do keep bumping this?"
'Cause I can bitches!!:p

[mista_mo]

Accumulating
all of the catholics
Serendipity

[clanglee]

I'm a catholic
Am I to be collected?
now I am confused.:confused:

[Wyldwraith]

More Haikus,

Ghoul Apocalypse
Mocks Organized Religion
No Last Minute Save
------------------------
The Human Species
Blindingly Oblivious
As Certain Doom Nears
------------------------
Hope for Mankind
Means Resisting Panicked Chaos
To Stand United
------------------------
How Do Zombies Win
Not By Greater Ability
But By Mankind's Flaws
------------------------
Stagnant And Mindless
Blindly Following The Herd
Mankind's Epitaph
------------------------

Just some off-the-cuff Haikus. Thought this thread deserved a bump.

[Trin]

No more room in Hell?
God proving he's still the boss?
Who's really to say?

[Wyldwraith]

When The Undead Rise
One Had Best Be Well Prepared
Or Else You're Just Meat
-----------------------------
Zombie Apocalypse
Judgment Of The Almighty?
God's Twisted Humor
-----------------------------
Who Survives Their Rise?
The Quick, The Smart, The Lucky
Which Applies To You?
-----------------------------
Humanity's End
Doesn't Come With A Warning
It Creeps Up On Us
-----------------------------
What Would Your Choice Be
When Grim Death Comes A'Callin?
Fight or Surrender?
-----------------------------
See That First Zombie
Creeping Slowly Towards You
How To Cope With That?
-----------------------------
The Undead Rising
Provides Opportunities
To Find Your Real Self
-----------------------------
Alone And Outmanned
Some Give In To Their Despair
Some Fight To The End
-----------------------------
They're Coming For You
Coming To Get All Of You
Look Out Behind You!
-----------------------------

Just a few more off the cuff. Hope someone enjoys least one or two of them.
Always liked this thread. Sorry I'm not good at the more humorous Haikus.

[clanglee]

No no, very good stuff man!!

I always like it when this thread gets a bump as well.:D