50 reasons why Return of the Living Dead sucks

[MinionZombie]

Hellsing, like I'd say to a Christian burning their TV license, if you don't like it, don't watch it ... or in this case, don't read it. Also - ROTLD ... and satire ... ??? Satire ... in ROTLD??? ... ROTLD ... and satire? *gets stuck in a confusion loop* The point in a bitch list is to stomach sitting through a sh*t movie, but have fun doing so...kinda like a written version of a conversation you might have with a few mates as you watch it (like I did with COTLD originally when I bought it at uni, we all drank and took the piss out of it for weeks thereafter). Then post it for the fun of those who'd appreciate it. Seriously - bit of fun, goddamn...

[clanglee]

I'm not gonna bust your balls Bass. I do, personally, love the movie. But I respect the fact that you don't. You do bring up some good points, but since the movie was meant to be silly, the points don't particularly resonate with me. I did like your point about the acid rain tho. . . never noticed that.

[ZombieGrrL]

Your list gave me a good laugh bassman311. Very good points! I think ROTLD is a great film - obviously it's not without it's faults, which I think really adds to the charm. The overacting, music, nudity & "punk kids" are so typical of the 80's comedy/horror genre - WITH zombies.

[MikePizzoff]

Totally agree. As far as zombie comedies go, I'd watch this over Shaun anyday. Yes sir, same here. I bet we get crucified for this!

[bassman]

Yes sir, same here. I bet we get crucified for this! Nah, I wouldn't crucify you guys for it. Obviously I'm one of the few around here that doesn't like ROTLD(I know of a few others, but for some reason they don't seem to be coming forward). The only reason why I don't agree with your opinions on these two films is because Shaun was meant as a comedy while I know people argue otherwise, I don't believe ROTLD was meant to be.

[kortick]

Well Bass ol pal, as far as it goes you are free to hate any movie you like for any reason. so its all cool. But i remember seeing Return when it came out back in 1985. And it was most definitley promoted as a horror/comedy. The people in the theater were laughing their asses off. and lines like: "do you hear that? thats dead people screaming?" and "are you crazy? are you on PCP"? and the best: "It worked in the movie" the movie was a total laugh and yeah the ending was lame but it was all in fun

[bassman]

Well....the trailer doesn't seem to be promoting it as a comedy. Just the typical 80's cheese.... I think it was only labeled as a comedy because it got a sort of cult following like Reefer Madness or Manos: The Hands of Fate. All films that were made to be serious but turned out funny by accident.

[Mike70]

a couple of things about that vid bass: it does seem to be playing up the comedy aspects. though lots of folks have different ideas on what is funny. and i've never heard a trailer (which are usually approved for all audiences) use the phrase "god damn" or the word asshole. both no go's on TV and in theater trailers (at least in 1985). so i wonder what the original source was for this?

[kortick]

That is definatley not the original trailer. The original trailer had the girl dancing in the grave yard. I remember that very clearly. I dont know what that was but it wasnt the movie theater trailer. Maybe the one they put on vhs tapes. And I am 100% certain it was billed as a horror/comedy. It may have been 1985, but i still remember the difference between the way they marketed Day of the Dead and this film, which came out close to each other. Totally different. Why what do you remember about it when it came out? Do you remember Tv commercials showing it as horror? The ones I remember had the song "Tonight we make love (until we die)" in them. Maybe they marketed it different where you lived. I never thought if that.

[bassman]

I don't know how they marketed it. I'm just going off what I've seen in the trailer. But you guys are saying that's not the trailer, so I don't know. I thought that was the trailer i've always seen..

[MinionZombie]

*prepares crucifix ... gathers some rusty nine inchers ... digs a poo moat running down the mountain for the inevitable ROTLD rubber poop monster birthed from the effluence of ROTLD-over-Shaun-preferers* (I'm watching Dogma ) ... Oh wait, what? You won't crucify them for that? Damn ... now what the hell am I gonna do with this crucifix ... and, and these nine inchers ... ... ... and this poo moat? ... Goddamnit.

[MikePizzoff]

The trailer Bassman posted is a fan-made one. Here is the real trailer, which I feel makes it quite obvious that the movie is a comedy-horror.

[bd2999]

Eh, to each there own. I really liked the movie and still think of it as one of the best non Romero zombie movies out there. Plus it did not bother me at all that they were able to run and unkillable, I thought it was a nice spin on the whole thing. I think it has more wiggle room than movies like children or the Day remake and what have you though, because the movie is as much a comedy as a horror film. I disagree with several of the points though about it raping Night of the Living Dead. I think movies like Children of the Living Dead and such do that pretty well by trying to make something to close to the original that ends up being utter trash. This movie made the connection and then basicly said the only thing he got right in that movie was that the dead could come back. I think the whole point of the movie, at least from commentary, was to get away from that sort of zombie in a sort of fun way that acknowledges Romero but at the same time goes off into something new. Everyone gets an opinion though, but at the same time at least this movie was fairly original at the time, compare that to the sequels that came after it. Now some of those are trash.

[DubiousComforts]

I don't know how they marketed it. I'm just going off what I've seen in the trailer. But you guys are saying that's not the trailer, so I don't know. The film was absolutely marketed as a horror/black comedy. The original poster had a cartoony punk corpse spray painting the title on a tombstone with the tagline "they're back from the dead and ready to party!"

[Andy]

1. It was requested. Don't read the numbered lists if you're getting tired of them. The real irony is that no-one made you watch this movie