I just Farted and its Smells like...Describe your Farts

[Gabe_dead]

Broken Mud Dam, I was taking a shit preceded by some farts and as I was cleaning my ass my finger broke through the Toilet paper and low and behold, I had kaka paste all over my finger, it was sick , I could decided How I was going to finish whipping my ass or get up and wash my hand then continue to whipe. True Story.... lmfao....

[ProfessorChaos]

are you sure you're 30? goddamn, between starting this thread and the disgusting posts you've made in it, i'd guess you're about 13.

[Gabe_dead]

Yea Professor, I am 30 and I pay a mortgage and run a business crazy ha, but this is the only place I can be myself.... True Story.... 11/30/79

[ProfessorChaos]

well, i wasn't trying to be as harsh as that probably came off, but the other day i had this hot chick i'm interested in over at my place and my laptop was open to these boards and this thread was at the top of the "newest posts" page. didn't realize it till we sat down on the couch and i glanced at my screen and saw what was at the top of the page..luckily, i found some excuse to look something up and navigated away from the page before she noticed. while i freely admit to any and everybody i'm a zombie dork and am proud to belong to this fine community of fellow fanboys and uber-geeks, that moment was the first time in the 4 years i've been posting here where i was actually embarrassed that a girl saw my browser open to these boards. in fact, the last 2 serious girlfriends i've had have both actually gotten in to the whole zombie thing and think it's "cute" how nerdy i am for the genre at times, but with a new chick who doesn't know me and a thread about "describe your farts" at the top of the page, it was quite an uncomfortable moment.

[Gabe_dead]

I live a doubble life, meaning none of the honeys I mess with know. That I love. Zombies but the fact is I do, and its not a conversation you can strike up with just anyone, but I always erase my browser history and close my browser before I have a potential lay come over.. That's page 2 on the player hand book, always cover your tracks. All bs aside I love you guys for being down with the zombies...

[jded]

This thread has me cracking up the most in a long time, but then talking about farts always includes a bunch of giggles. You ever been at the grocery store walking down the aisle by yourself and you let one loose? You pause a little and keep going, and then that speedy gonzales lady turns the corner and she's coming your way. You make a quick left and duck around the corner into the next aisle, and you know she's smelling it right now. I've even wanted to shout, "don't come down this way!" Lately mine have been smelling like not much of anything, just a tremendous amount of air and a super wicked earthly sound.

[MikePizzoff]

This thread is hilarious! The day I stop laughing at farts is the day I die. I actually have a joke-band with my buddy called The Fartists. We've got an 18-track CD out and an X-mas EP recorded, soon to be released. Anybody interested, get in touch with me and I'll put you on my shitsmas list for it.

[Tricky]

Ha ha I have a fart machine app on my phone, it has an amazing array of different fart sounds from the squeakers to the massive ship horn type! Farts are always funny, there should be no age limit on laughing at them

[MinionZombie]

My housemates bought me a fart machine for one of my birthdays whilst I was at uni. It didn't half make me laugh, I tell you. It even cracked up my folks - everybody loves a fart noise! Last couple of days however, I've not been farting with confidence. I think it was a microwave burger that did me in, which hasn't happened for a good 6 or 7 years ... I'll avoid them for a while methinks.

[krakenslayer]

The other day a friend of mine did a fart that smelled like piss. Still not sure how that works.

[rongravy]

Broccoli. Been eating healthy...