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Thread: MZ's Movie Review Thread

  1. #91
    Team Rick MinionZombie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by shootemindehead View Post
    Jesus....that bad eh?


    Not quite the reason I was awake thinking about the movie...

    -- -------- Post added 25-Jul-2012 at 01:47 PM ---------- Previous post was 24-Jul-2012 at 10:29 AM ----------

    The Lost Weekend, Real Steel, Cowboys & Aliens, and The Change Up:
    http://deadshed.blogspot.co.uk/2012/...ooze-bots.html

    Alcoholism 1940s style, Rocky with robots, passing the Ronseal test, and body-swapping mixed with projectile bowel movements...

  2. #92
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    Quote Originally Posted by MinionZombie View Post
    Alcoholism 1940s style, Rocky with robots, passing the Ronseal test, and body-swapping mixed with projectile bowel movements...

    What a way to summarize those movies!

  3. #93
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    Quote Originally Posted by LouCipherr View Post
    What a way to summarize those movies!
    Well, I try to entertain while I inform.

  4. #94
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    Green Lantern, Welcome to the Rileys, and The Help:
    http://deadshed.blogspot.co.uk/2012/...-lanterns.html

    The first is certainly no Batman Begins and features an evil space cloud, the second features Kristen Stewart playing a grumpy stripper opposite James Gandolfini, and the third was busy bothering the Oscars earlier this year...

  5. #95
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    The Expendables 2:
    http://deadshed.blogspot.co.uk/2012/...lm-review.html

    Suffice to say, I had a shitload of fun.

  6. #96
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    Apollo 18, Absolute Power, Killer Elite, The Pool Boys, and Bowfinger:
    http://deadshed.blogspot.co.uk/2012/...gs-aliens.html

    I was pleasantly surprised by Apollo 18 - wasn't expecting much, but the atmosphere and setting really sold the flick. Not amazing, but solid stuff.

  7. #97
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    Screamers: The Hunting - a.k.a. The 2nd Worst Movie I've Seen All Year:
    http://deadshed.blogspot.co.uk/2012/...-all-year.html

    Seriously - it's shit of the highest magnitude. Read on to find out why.

  8. #98
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    Quote Originally Posted by MinionZombie View Post
    Screamers: The Hunting - a.k.a. The 2nd Worst Movie I've Seen All Year:
    http://deadshed.blogspot.co.uk/2012/...-all-year.html

    Seriously - it's shit of the highest magnitude. Read on to find out why.
    After such a dud flick, it was nice to follow it up with three goodies.

    American Pie Reunion, The Raid, and Brazil:
    http://deadshed.blogspot.co.uk/2012/...nostalgia.html

    Nostalgia mixed with tits, 101 minutes of amazing arse-kicking, and a beautiful Orwellian nightmare from the barmy mind of Terry Gilliam...

  9. #99
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    Quote Originally Posted by MinionZombie View Post
    Screamers: The Hunting - a.k.a. The 2nd Worst Movie I've Seen All Year:
    http://deadshed.blogspot.co.uk/2012/...-all-year.html

    Seriously - it's shit of the highest magnitude. Read on to find out why.
    This is the most awesome summary of a movie, ever!

    "Suffice to say, Screamers: The Hunting is 5% decent, and 95% sheer, total, utter, incomprehensible, bland-as-wallpaper-paste, piss-poorly written, forgettably-directed, cheap-looking, generic-to-the-nth-degree shite."

    Last edited by LouCipherr; 27-Sep-2012 at 02:02 PM. Reason: .

  10. #100
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    Quote Originally Posted by LouCipherr View Post
    This is the most awesome summary of a movie, ever!

    "Suffice to say, Screamers: The Hunting is 5% decent, and 95% sheer, total, utter, incomprehensible, bland-as-wallpaper-paste, piss-poorly written, forgettably-directed, cheap-looking, generic-to-the-nth-degree shite."

    A summary that blows the entire movie's script right out of the water. The script was just abominable. It really was. I was surprised by how shite it was. Still, the first movie holds up to this day, and I think we can thank far more talented folks like Dan O'Bannon and Peter Weller for that.

  11. #101
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    Quote Originally Posted by MinionZombie View Post
    A summary that blows the entire movie's script right out of the water. The script was just abominable. It really was. I was surprised by how shite it was. Still, the first movie holds up to this day, and I think we can thank far more talented folks like Dan O'Bannon and Peter Weller for that.
    MZ, this deserved a new "I have shamed myself..." thread from the sounds of it!
    Last edited by LouCipherr; 27-Sep-2012 at 05:50 PM. Reason: .

  12. #102
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    Quote Originally Posted by LouCipherr View Post
    MZ, this deserved a new "I have shamed myself..." thread from the sounds of it!
    hehe, that's a LouCipherr trademark.

    I keep all my numerous movie musings here under one roof ... now, Bitch Lists on the other hand ... in fact I would have done a bitch list for "Screamers: The Hunting" if I'd known in advance how awful it was going to be. I mean really, you think it can't get anymore idiotic, but then it proves you wrong - time after time. It's offensive really, as someone trying to break into the filmmaking world, that total and utter runny horse shit such as that can get produced and those responsible are paid to subject planet earth to it.

    I wrote a sequel to Screamers when I was like 12 on a computer that wasn't even Windows 3.1, and at a mere 3 to 5 pages of children's-level writing, I bet it was better than the pish served up in that movie.

    Seriously. Screamers: The Hunting. Fuck that movie.


  13. #103
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    Quote Originally Posted by MinionZombie View Post
    hehe, that's a LouCipherr trademark.
    Well, unlike the MPAA, the RIAA, and all those other copyright/trademark lunatics, I would never sue if you decided to put up a "shame" thread.

    In fact, I'd like to let everyone know right now that "shame" threads have officially been thrown into the public domain. Have at it.

    I keep all my numerous movie musings here under one roof ... now, Bitch Lists on the other hand ... in fact I would have done a bitch list for "Screamers: The Hunting" if I'd known in advance how awful it was going to be. I mean really, you think it can't get anymore idiotic, but then it proves you wrong - time after time. It's offensive really, as someone trying to break into the filmmaking world, that total and utter runny horse shit such as that can get produced and those responsible are paid to subject planet earth to it.
    I would ask for a bitch list, but then again, I'm a nice enough person to not ask you to do a second viewing of such a wretched piece of shit.

    Seriously. Screamers: The Hunting. Fuck that movie.
    Fuck it in it's stupid ass!

    That's how I felt about Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies!

    Which, if you think Screamers 2 was bad, go check out that wonderful shit-fest from our favorite movie company of all time, Asylum.

    *pukes on his own shoes*

    Sorry about that, I'll go get a towel.
    Last edited by LouCipherr; 27-Sep-2012 at 07:53 PM. Reason: .

  14. #104
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    Ugh, The Asylum?! I will never support the junk that they toss out there like a discarded jizzy tissue.

  15. #105
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    Quote Originally Posted by MinionZombie View Post
    Ugh, The Asylum?! I will never support the junk that they toss out there like a discarded jizzy tissue.
    Look again at that dot. That's here. That's home. That's us. On it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever was, lived out their lives. The aggregate of our joy and suffering, thousands of confident religions, ideologies, and economic doctrines, every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of civilization, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every mother and father, hopeful child, inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every corrupt politician, every "superstar," every "supreme leader," every saint and sinner in the history of our species lived there--on a mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam. [click for more]
    -Carl Sagan

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