Elm Street remake - the new Freddy?

**darth los** · 09-Apr-2010

Originally Posted by MinionZombie

Lou, Darth ... quit trying so hard.

I'm not saying RZ's H1 and H2 don't have flaws, indeed I listed many about H2 - yet, as I also said when blogging about it, it strangely compelled me and I ended up respecting it ... I'm just saying that I actually quite like them both.

Yawn04 can suck the shit out of a donkey's butt-chute for all I care ... motherfucker had that stupid bitch chasing after "Chips" in it for starters.

But MZ, then everyone will know I'm just an internet gangsta.

And the chips thing is definitely the dumbest shit I've ever seen on celluloid. The only purpose for that was to advance the story and have them in an impossible position, moving at a frenetic pace in which a bunch of things could and did go wrong.

I'll say it again. It can't sniff the original's jockstrap but it's not as bad a fim as some make it out to be.

Lou is just pointing out, and imo rightly so, the incosistencies in the reviews some have given dawn 04' vs. Rz's H. considering that they both were for all intents and purposes constructed in the same way.

**DjfunkmasterG** · 09-Apr-2010

Originally Posted by darth los

Lou is just pointing out, and imo rightly so, the incosistencies in the reviews some have given dawn 04' vs. Rz's H. considering that they both were for all intents and purposes constructed in the same way.

yeah. how do you like them apples?

**MinionZombie** · 10-Apr-2010

Originally Posted by LouCipherr

MZ - I'm not "trying too hard"

I'm looking down the internet pipe right now and I can see the sweat on your brow ... bit of a limited view, mind, being a pipe and all.

Originally Posted by DjfunkmasterG

Don't make LOU and I come up with 110 reasons why H1 (2007) Sucks MZ.

You know we will do it.

I double dares ya.

...

It's just my opinion folks, and I've articulated it on my blog as best I can. H1 and H2 (especially H2) aren't paragons of perfection by any means ... and Yawn04 would be a sucky movie regardless of title, before that lazy swipe is made again by the pro-Yawn crowd. It plays to the lowest common denominator and throws protagonists at the screen like Labour does tax payer's money at any and all problems ... like flinging dysentary at the side of a barn.

**Tricky** · 11-Apr-2010

Ive never liked the freddy movies, even when I was a teenage horror nut I found them crap, and last night I caught Wes Cravens new nightmare on TV and watched it due to lack of anything else on, and it was equally bad

**ProfessorChaos** · 11-Apr-2010

Originally Posted by Tricky

Ive never liked the freddy movies, even when I was a teenage horror nut I found them crap, and last night I caught Wes Cravens new nightmare on TV and watched it due to lack of anything else on, and it was equally bad

i'm with ya there, man. i have never even been able to sit through an entire freddy film. i've seen bits of a few of them, but they've just always come off as mindless (not quite as mindless as the saw films, mind you) and silly. freddy and his shit one-liners only make 'em worse.

**Tricky** · 11-Apr-2010

Originally Posted by ProfessorChaos

i'm with ya there, man. i have never even been able to sit through an entire freddy film. i've seen bits of a few of them, but they've just always come off as mindless (not quite as mindless as the saw films, mind you) and silly. freddy and his shit one-liners only make 'em worse.

They're not helped by how poorly the special effects have aged, but regardless of that the acting is appalling throughout the series, and freddy himself becomes more of a parody of himself the further the series progresses, even in the first one he was like a crap parody of other slasher movies that came before it!

**MinionZombie** · 12-Apr-2010

For me, the scariest thing about the Freddy franchise is how they turned a child murdering paedophile into a cuddly rogue with toys of him sold directly to children.

Nightmare 1 and 3 are the ones worth bothering about, 2 is okay, and 7 is so goddamned slow until the final act when it finally becomes interesting - and indeed New Nightmare was the creepiest Freddy had been in donkey's years.

I recently watched Nightmare 4 through 7 you see, and goddamn, they're pish. 4 and 5 are closely linked and just suck, and 6 is absolutely terrible - attacked by a road map, anyone? It's beyond retarded that flick, and then as I just said, New Nightmare - while a decent idea - was far too slow paced. It was mostly tedious until Freddy finally got his act together in that bad ass trench coat.

So considering how shit many of the sequels were, the remake will easily blow those out of the water ... but will it best the original? Somehow I doubt it - it's the rule of these remakes, they never best the original.

**shootemindehead** · 12-Apr-2010

At least Rob Zombie updated the actual original film with his 'Halloween' remake. Neither of which I think are good movies, IMO.

However, all Snyder did, was take a great location idea and ripoff the Romero title. The rest of the film has fuck all to do with the original. It's a cynical cash-in of a well known and respected title on order to get more money.

The location didn't HAVE to be a shopping mall and the title didn't HAVE to be 'Dawn of the Dead', becasue it had nothing to do with 'Dawn of the Dead'.

**mista_mo** · 12-Apr-2010

The sequels to pretty much every other slasher flick are just as bad as any of the nightmare on elm street sequels. Good God, the Friday the 13th series is possibly home to the worst sequels in movie history.

As far as I am concerned however, there is only one NOES movie, and that is the original.

Also, Dawn 2004 wasn't that bad of a film at all. But you seem to be pretty militant in your hatred for it, and I can respect that, even if I disagree with most of your assessments of said film.

**AcesandEights** · 12-Apr-2010

Saw my first commercial on tv for this movie last night. I'm guessing I won't be seeing it in the theaters, but that's not a big surprise as I'm not a general horror movie aficionado.

**MinionZombie** · 12-Apr-2010

Pfft, the Friday sequels are waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay better than the Nightmare sequels.

#2 gives us Jason with the sack, and it's got that great early 1980s slasher vibe to it.
#3 wasn't as good by any means, but Jason rocks, he gets his hockey mask, it was done in 3D for camp value, picks up right after the second movie and the final act is boss.
#4 was the best of the sequels, continues right after the third movie, Savini's back on gore duty, the kids are entertaining and get hacked up in gleefully gruesome ways, and it's just generally badass.
#5 sucks, but has a very few moments ... two of which are bewb related.
#6 was a balls-out-swinging fun time - Alice Cooper, went for a more tongue-in-cheek vibe, stood out on its own, Zombie Jason is born.
#7 shamefully neutered by the MPAA, but the best Jason there ever was is given to us.
#8 I pretty much hated first time I saw it, but then upon a 2nd viewing recently I actually dig it quite a bit ... shamefully neutered again, but the final third is seriously awesome, and it's still Kane Hodder owning everybody!
#9 sucked balls.
#10 had some moments, and while I quite liked it originally, my opinion has sunk over the years.

FvJ was torturous ... bad, bad, bad movie.
F13th2009 ... ... an okay movie, but the shadow of TCM2003 loomed ridiculously large over it to its detriment, some of it was really enjoyable, and other parts were just lame. If they follow it up (I'm sure they will) then hopefully they'll learn from their mistakes ... the new guy playing Jason is cool though.

**darth los** · 12-Apr-2010

Originally Posted by MinionZombie

#2 gives us Jason... sack,

I couldn't read that long ass post. I blacked out when I heard Jason's sack.

Somebody's going to post that in their sig somewhere but the hell with it.

**shootemindehead** · 12-Apr-2010

Originally Posted by mista_mo

The sequels to pretty much every other slasher flick are just as bad as any of the nightmare on elm street sequels. Good God, the Friday the 13th series is possibly home to the worst sequels in movie history.

As far as I am concerned however, there is only one NOES movie, and that is the original.

Also, Dawn 2004 wasn't that bad of a film at all. But you seem to be pretty militant in your hatred for it, and I can respect that, even if I disagree with most of your assessments of said film.

I agree Mo, I think the original 'Nightmare on Elm Street' is a good film, it's classic status has been diluted with the truly appaling sequels.

As for 'Dawn of the Dead' (2004), I don't hate that film, I just see it as a cynical use of a popular (and better) movie's title and situation. But, in reality it's not really a re-make. It just rips-off certain items, because basically the writers were too lazy to come up with something original. There's no reason why the mall couldn't have been an Army Barracks or a prison or something and the title something COMPLETELY different. It still would have been essentially the same film.

I actually think the film is OK. But, has some really dumb parts, uninteresting characters and rubbish zombies. In fact the best part of the film is the end credit sequence, except for that rubbish song.