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Thread: Rate the last movie you've seen

  1. #1351
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    Quote Originally Posted by Neil View Post
    Oh!

    I love the first one!
    Aye, the first one was damn good fun. The sequel misses all the charm of the original and does some painful retreads of scenes and gags we've already seen. Horrible Bosses 2 was pretty ropey compared to the first movie (which, again, was jolly good fun!), but Hot Tub Time Machine 2 is just ... ... rubbish.

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    That's a real shame.
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    ‘In the Deep’ (or 47 Meters Down)

    Another film that doesn’t know what to call itself and yet another shark movie, although this one is much better than last years ‘The Shallows’, which in fairness started off well but descended into nonsense towards the end.

    ‘In the Deep’ is a simple story, simply told, about a pair of sisters on holiday in Mexico that get stranded…ahem..47 meters down, after the shark cage they’re in detaches itself from the SS Rustbucket, captained by a jobbing actor AKA Mathew Modine.

    After a bit of, frankly unnecessary, backstory involving Kate (Mandy Moore), her and Lisa (Claire Holt) head off to their fate and the action starts. This is where the film becomes a reasonable thriller and, in the main, is handled very well. It’s tense, exciting and the CGI Great Whites (what else?) are rendered fairly convincingly in many of the scenes that require them.

    It lets itself down a touch near the end, but for most of its 90 minutes, it passes by pleasingly enough and does what it has to do.


    7/10


    ‘Life’

    It’s life Jim, but not as we know it.

    Actually, it kind of is “as we know it” as there is nothing in ‘Life’ that we haven’t seen before. But, it’s presented here quite well and makes for an entertaining story in its own right.

    On the International Space Station, a crew that ticks all the Hollywood diversity boxes, is challenged by a new lifeform that they picked up from an unmanned Mars probe. This new life, named by schoolkids as “Calvin”, grows with incredible speed and proves to be - as Ash from ‘Alien’ said - a tough little son of a bitch as he picks off the ISS crew one by one.

    As said, you’ve seen everything in ‘Life’ before, both in the aforementioned ‘Alien’ and all of its subsequent rip offs. But, it passes by well, is acted decently and has a satisfying conclusion.

    Among the crew are Ryan Renolds and Jake Gyllenhaal, with support filled out from international non-stars. The effects are well handled and “Calvin” is put to good use and is a believable entity.

    8/10



    ‘Hush’

    A deaf mute woman, Maddie Young, is tormented by a crazed assailant in her isolated, rural, home. Her handicap is overcome by her ingenuity as she has to use her wits to battle against her knife and crossbow wielding adversary, who seems more intent on causing her destress than just murdering her.

    ‘Hush’, is a simple slasher film with an interesting gimmick for the lead actress. But, it’s one of the absolute best examples of the long tired genre, which proves there’s life in the old dog yet. It’s handled smartly, with a heroine that you actually can root for. Made by gifted amateurs, it shows up a lot of genre operatives as lazy hacks. It’s tense throughout, unnerving and delightfully gory when it needs to be.

    Highly recommended.

    9/10



    ‘The Autopsy of Jane Doe’

    A film that starts off well, but then tumbles along, unsure, to the finish line. “Jane Doe” is a remarkably preserved female body who’s found at the site of an apparent house massacre by a local sheriff (Michael McElhatton). He brings her to the county coroner (Brian Cox) who, with the aid of his son (Emile Hirsch) has to determine the cause of death.

    As they proceed with their grislily task, it becomes more and more apparent that “Jane Doe” possesses some terrible secrets, which the two men slowly uncover.

    ‘The Autopsy of Jane Doe’ is a nice idea and for the bulk of its running time plays out very well indeed. Its final act, though, is a bit of a disappointment and one gets the feeling that the writer just didn’t know where to go. It’s rather like a Lovecraft short, but with a bombastic ending that the great man would have balked at. Unfortunately, for movies, a standard (and logical ) Lovecraft ending probably just wouldn’t cut it with most audiences, so 'The Autopsy of Jane Doe' tries to go out with an ill-conceived bang, rather than the obvious whimper that would have served it better.

    Still though, there’s an awful lot here to like. It’s spooky, has a few well done scares and gross in sensible parts. Hirsch and (the always watchable) Cox are fine in their lead roles, with a ballsy (if sedate) performance from Ophelia Lovibond, who spends almost the entire film naked on a metal autopsy table.


    6.5/10



    ‘Lake Mungo’

    Zero budget Australian mockumentary about a family dealing with the grief of their dead daughter. The more the film unfolds, the more it reveals its supernatural shenanigans and it’s all carried out in a very subtle way. That’s not a criticism, it’s an appraisal. In the current cinematic world of “quiet, quiet, LOUD” type horror films, it’s a genuine delight to see something that can be delicately unsettling in an understated, but palpable way. There’s no “cattle prod” tactics here.

    ‘Lake Mungo’ follows the Palmer family as the come to terms with the drowning of the daughter, Alice. They, and other participants, are interviewed in a documentary style by an unnamed filmmaker as he asks them various questions about the event and the subsequent ghostly occurrences that plague them afterwards.

    It’s creepy, spooky and leaves the viewer with a tingle down their spine in a way that has been all but forgotten by most contemporary filmmakers. It makes great use of imagery and background audio and it also benefits from the cast of complete unknowns, who all take the script completely serious, thereby influencing the audience to do so as well. One of ‘Lake Mungo’ triumphs is that it genuinely feels real, in a way that something like ‘Paranormal Activity’ doesn’t. You never really forget that you’re watching a film with ‘Paranormal Activity’, but once or twice during ‘Lake Mungo’ I had to remind myself that I wasn’t watching the Discovery Channel. That may put some people off, but while most mockumentaries are comedic affairs and most supernatural documentaries lack any kind of pay off, ‘Lake Mungo’ delivers the package that it sets out to deliver.

    9/10



    ‘The Corpse of Anna Fritz’

    Interesting Spanish film with a disturbing (if farfetched) premise. Beautiful actress Anna Fritz has died and is being “held on ice” down the local hospital morgue, awaiting her final journey. Three Castilian neerdowells, one of whom works at the hospital where Anna currently lays, decide to take a look at the corpse, before heading out to a party on a diet of liquor and lines. It doesn’t go at all well for anybody concerned.

    ‘The Corpse of Anna Fritz’ is a dish best served cold, in that the viewer will get more out of the film with the less they know about it. Some of its elements may be extremely uncomfortable for certain viewers, but nevertheless it’s compelling viewing.

    8/10
    Last edited by MinionZombie; 18-Sep-2017 at 07:14 PM. Reason: Removed accidentally duplicated text.
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  4. #1354
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    Legend - 7.5/10

    Written & Directed by Brian Helgeland (IIRC he won an Oscar for adapting L.A. Confidential), the tale of The Krays starring Tom Hardy as both brothers. Tom Hardy owns the movie up and down the block with two distinct performances. In the early portions of the movie it's surprisingly funny and entertaining at times, but gets progressively darker as it moves on, and Hardy is able to make The Krays charming one minute and then subtly sinister (and even downright scary) the next.

    Passengers - 7.5/10

    Much better and more enjoyable than I was expecting, with more sci-fi elements than I was expecting for such a mainstream movie. Written by the guy who did the (original) script for Prometheus, it's funny to see how the Twitter-verse "ooh, that looks well creepy" whinge-a-thon comments are all addressed in the actual movie, if you'd bother to actually watch it instead of judging it purely on the trailer in the context of your own look-at-me agenda of virtue ... ... *gasp* ... ... anyway, pretty good fun and worth checking out. One thing is really weird though - Andy Garcia, who has fifth billing (okay, out of five) in the movie, has no lines and less than 30 seconds of screen time (a hell of a lot less than the post-hybernation computer AI character who isn't credited, apparently) ... WTF is all that about?

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    'V'

    TV classic from the early 80's that actually stands the test of time in a lot of places. It's also bloody awful in others. What I watched was the first two miniseries, 'V' and 'V - The Final Battle'. The actual series was utter dreck, which saw two of its regulars leave half way through in disgust.

    I'm don't think I'm spoiling anything here, but 'V' deals with reptilian aliens landing on Earth who want to exploit us for our liquid resources and our food - which is us. Humanity gets split into rebels and quislings and the show pretty much plays out like that til its, unintentionally hilarious ending.

    It remains nothing but watchable though and is still very entertaining for what it is. However, it really is showing its age. Effects that were fantastic to kid me are now terribly quaint and some of the acting is downright painful. In addition there are some characters that one could only wish pain on - Hello Robin!

    Elsewhere, The Beastmaster tries his best Han Solo impression, Faye Grant does a solid leader under pressure turn, Michael Ironside is still as cool as ever and Jane Bader is still great as a lizard that would be right at home on the set of 'Dynasty' or 'Dallas', she's all rouge, big hair and attitude.

    It's a little too ham-fisted in its war/nazi allegory - especially in its way too heavy handed holocaust angle - but, it's all relatively forgivable if you just ignore that.

    The more solid of the two miniseries is definitely the first part, simply titled 'V', which plays out showing us the arrival of the alien ships and the subsequent reveals that all is not what it seems. It comfortably leads into 'V: The Final Battle', which sees the ongoing struggle of the resistance against the lizardlike overlords, the birth of an alien/human hybrid and the eventual victory of the humans over the "visitors" - finally enabled by one of TV's most eye bulging moments of Deus ex Machina that was ever dared.

    'V' wouldn't stand a chance with a modern audience if it was shown as is today, but if you want a nostalgia trip, it's just the ticket. It's easy to understand why it was so popular in 1983/4 and as a basic story has a lot to recommend it. It's unfortunate that the attempt at the remake from 2009 was just so awful, as a modern update could really be very good.

    6/10


    'The Bad Batch'

    Hideously overlong, with a terribly thin story that is stretched well beyond its elasticity, 'The Bad Batch' really tests the viewers patience. It sounds like something that any 'Mad Max' or 'Fallout 3' fan might enjoy and indeed there is a lot in it that would appeal to those who like that kind of stuff. But, there just isn't any tale going on here. At least not one that makes hanging around til the end worth the wait. It's really an 80 minute film extended out to 2 hours and it feels like it.

    'The Bad Batch' are a group of prisoners, presumably in the near future, that are dumped into an area in Texas that is a fenced off prison - 'Escape from New York' style - and forced to fend for themselves against the environment and other prisoners.

    The prisoner we follow is Arlen, a young woman who's been sentenced to to time inside this fenced off area. She soon comes to understand just how awful life is here, as she's captured by cannibals. Eventually escaping, somewhat worse for wear, she gets revenge on one of them and takes her small child. This child gets lost along the way and Arlen and the young girls father must uneasily team up to find her.

    As said, there just isn't enough there to play out over 2 hours. But Ana Lily Amirpour's second feature has some entertaining parts to it. It's wonderfully violent, grossly abusive to its heroine that few films would attempt and creates a convincing and desolate world full of danger and despair.

    But, aside from the story criticism, it's saddled with an awful soundtrack, impenetrable dialogue and unsatisfying set pieces.

    'The Bad Batch' kinda feels like one of those offbeat 70's sci-fi movies. The kind which you never see any more, like 'A Boy and his Dog'. However, I really don't know what Amirpour is trying to say with her film or if she was trying to say anything at all, other than life is crap and if pushed we end up eating each other (at least metaphorically).

    But, it needed more umph, a little more WTF and a more judicious use of the editing scissors. As it stands, it's sort of interesting, but interminable.

    4.5/10
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  6. #1356
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    The Ultimate Warrior - 1975:

    Pretty cool post-apocalyptic movie with a solid cast of veteran actors (Yul Brynner, Max von Sydow, William Smith)

  7. #1357
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    Quote Originally Posted by JDP View Post
    The Ultimate Warrior - 1975:

    Pretty cool post-apocalyptic movie with a solid cast of veteran actors (Yul Brynner, Max von Sydow, William Smith)
    Haven't I seen this film compared to Day Of The Dead for some reason?
    Look again at that dot. That's here. That's home. That's us. On it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever was, lived out their lives. The aggregate of our joy and suffering, thousands of confident religions, ideologies, and economic doctrines, every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of civilization, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every mother and father, hopeful child, inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every corrupt politician, every "superstar," every "supreme leader," every saint and sinner in the history of our species lived there--on a mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam. [click for more]
    -Carl Sagan

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    Quote Originally Posted by Neil View Post
    Haven't I seen this film compared to Day Of The Dead for some reason?
    There are some general similarities, but I think this is due to plot elements that most post-apocalyptic films have in common. Day is about a group of surviving humans trying to put an end to a zombie plague and how their self-destructive petty quarrels foil any hope of achieving that. The Ultimate Warrior is about a group of surviving humans trying to put an end to a devastating plant plague that has almost wiped out mankind's agricultural production (thus drastically dwindling the food supply, and making surviving human groups to constantly try to destroy each other to get their hands on what food is left, some of them even resorting to cannibalism), and despite their self-destructive petty quarrels maybe managing to achieve that goal (the ending is a bit vague, but it looks hopeful, at least certainly more hopeful than Day's even more vague ending.)
    Last edited by JDP; 18-Oct-2017 at 10:45 AM. Reason: ;

  9. #1359
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    Had a few friends over and played a drinking game to fast-paced eurocrime.

    First film up was Violent Naples, an old Umberto Lenzi film from 1976. Fast paced and a lot of thrown punches.
    We then watched Live like a cop, die like a man and Rome Armed to the Teeth. Seen both before, great films.

    I've also managed to tick off The Mummy, with Peter Cushing. My first Hammer horror I think. Not too impressed.

    Also saw Nine Guests for a Crime. A giallo from 1976. Average.

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    Saw Suspiria on the big screen. 4k restoration. Looked beautiful. But man what a poor script. They plant so many things in the first half hour that never get a payoff.

    Last weeked I also saw;

    A Dragonfly for each corpse
    a GREAT film. Spanish giallo.

    The Doll of Satan
    Crazy 60's giallo. Mix it up with 60's fashion and gothic castles and voilá.

    New York Ripper
    It's alright but waaaaay to much sleaze for my tastes. It's really nasty.

    Kill Baby... Kill
    I wonder how many times Tim Burton has seen this?
    Last edited by EvilNed; 03-Nov-2017 at 10:14 AM. Reason: asfddsaadf

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    Quote Originally Posted by EvilNed View Post
    Saw Suspiria on the big screen. 4k restoration. Looked beautiful. But man what a poor script. They plant so many things in the first half hour that never get a payoff.

    Last weeked I also saw;

    A Dragonfly for each corpse
    a GREAT film. Spanish giallo.

    The Doll of Satan
    Crazy 60's giallo. Mix it up with 60's fashion and gothic castles and voilá.

    New York Ripper
    It's alright but waaaaay to much sleaze for my tastes. It's really nasty.

    Kill Baby... Kill
    I wonder how many times Tim Burton has seen this?
    'Suspiria' is a dumb as a bag of rocks, but it's actually a film I'd haul my arse to see in a restored print. Whether it hits these shores or not would be another matter.
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    Tales of Halloween
    This was on Halloween night so it was the second part in my Halloween night double bill (which kicked off with Candyman). It's a portmanteau film with numerous directors putting together short films that all take place within the same town. Naturally, some are better than others, but most have some kind of twist to them. It's a fun little flick, but the main attraction is that it's a veritable who's-who of genre film past and present - all kinds of people pop up in this movie: Adrienne Barbeau, Caroline Williams, Joe Dante, Trent Haaga, Noah Segan, Barry Bostwick, Cerena Vincent, and loads more.

    Quote Originally Posted by EvilNed View Post
    A Dragonfly for each corpse
    a GREAT film. Spanish giallo.

    New York Ripper
    It's alright but waaaaay to much sleaze for my tastes. It's really nasty.

    Kill Baby... Kill
    I wonder how many times Tim Burton has seen this?
    1) Sounds interesting! I'll keep a look out for that one and give it a go sometime.

    2) I've seen that one a few times. First saw it on a terribly cropped pan & scan VHS that was released by Vipco in the very early 2000s (in the glut of newly released/re-released video nasties that had previously been banned or 'movie non grata' that came out in the wake of the shake-up at the BBFC in 1999), and that on one hand added to the sleaze (the sheer amount of grain to the image - but man alive, the pan & scan on it is some of the worst P&S I've ever seen), but on the other it absolutely butchered the cinematography. It is an extremely sleazy movie and pretty much nobody comes out of it as a worthy hero/heroine. Definitely one of the grottier video nasties, and lives up to the "nasty" part quite considerably.

    3) What's that one like? I'm curious about it.

  14. #1364
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    Quote Originally Posted by shootemindehead View Post
    'Suspiria' is a dumb as a bag of rocks, but it's actually a film I'd haul my arse to see in a restored print. Whether it hits these shores or not would be another matter.
    It all depends on wether there's a local distributor. Here in Sweden it showed in several cities on Halloween.

    Quote Originally Posted by MinionZombie View Post
    3) What's that one like? I'm curious about it.
    If gothic horror were drugs, this would be the heroine.
    It's like a 50 year old Sleepy Horror.
    Plotwise it's lacking but it's atmospheric enough to carry it through 85 minutes.

  15. #1365
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    Quote Originally Posted by EvilNed View Post
    It all depends on wether there's a local distributor. Here in Sweden it showed in several cities on Halloween.
    The only cinemas in Dublin who'd show it would be the Lighthouse or the IFI. Neither of which are, as of yet anyway.

    However, the IFI is showing 'Sorcerer' and the Lighthouse if showing 'Predator'. Both of which might be worth seeing on the big screen.
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