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Thread: Oh God please save humanity!

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    Oh God please save humanity!

    From Bloody-Disgusting

    We were informed this morning that Uwe Boll is already planning BloodRayne III if the sequel, BloodRayne II does well on it's direct-to-video release in 2007. We're told it'll put Rayne up against Nazi's... finally a connection between the game and the terrible franchise. The film BloodRayne is based on a sexy, supernatural huntress named BloodRayne (Loken), who is an unholy breed of human and vampire. In a quick take, Boll has confirmed that he has asked star Christian Slater to return in Alone in the Dark II and is awaiting his decision. Come on Slates, what gives?!

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    Team Rick MinionZombie's Avatar
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    Geez, does this guy ever stop (or will he ever stop)? I thought he was busy shooting the Postal movie, now he's already talking about this? Geez...

  3. #3
    capncnut
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    If Uwe Boll wants to shoot something worthwhile for a change then may I recommend he start with himself?

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    Rising Eyebiter's Avatar
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    Alone in the Dark II?

    Article from the screen writers of Alone in the Dark on what it's like to work for Uwe Boll...

    http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=2649


    Beware the beast, man, for he is the Devil's pawn. Alone among God's primates, he kills for sport or lust or greed. Yea, he will murder his brother to possess his brother's land. Let him not breed in great numbers, for he will make a desert of his home and yours. Shun him, drive him back into his jungle lair, for he is the harbinger of death.
    - 23rd Sacred Scroll, 6th verse

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    Inverting The Cross MikePizzoff's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CapnKnut View Post
    If Uwe Boll wants to shoot something worthwhile for a change then may I recommend he start with himself?
    ZING!

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    Team Rick MinionZombie's Avatar
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    Geeeeezus, that Boll-ock fella sounds like a complete dick ... why, oh why does anyone give him money?!

    And the desperate actors appearing in his movies would make a better career move from not being in his movies.

    Kristana Loken - what's she done besides T3 and Bloodrayne? And no, locking lips (ooh err) with Michelle Rodriguez doesn't count.

    Christian Slater - he's been on the slippery slope for years.

    Patrick Muldoon - acting like a block of wood in Starship Troopers, got his brains apparently sucked out for real and appears before Ewwwwww...Boll-ocks.

    I might actually try and watch the Postal movie, being a fan of the games ... but *sigh* I'll probably be damned to hell for doing son.

    That article was interesting, one bit that stood out most:

    this was the first movie I've ever seen featuring gratuitous tit-shots during a scene where a retarded girl is raped.
    *blinks* http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0279037/

    Geeeeeeez...

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    through another dimension bassman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MinionZombie View Post
    Kristana Loken - what's she done besides T3 and Bloodrayne? And no, locking lips (ooh err) with Michelle Rodriguez doesn't count.
    But she's mind numbingly hot. I've been contemplating watching Bloodrayne just for that reason. Maybe on mute, though.


    Christian Slater - he's been on the slippery slope for years.
    What? You mean you didn't like the straight-to-dvd release of "Hollow Man 2"?

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    Team Rick MinionZombie's Avatar
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    I've heard there's some kind of hot-ass lezzy scene in Bloodrayne or something, so maybe I'll acquire that scene...

  9. #9
    certified super rad Danny's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by zombie04 View Post
    From Bloody-Disgusting

    We were informed this morning that Uwe Boll is already planning BloodRayne III if the sequel, BloodRayne II does well on it's direct-to-video release in 2007. We're told it'll put Rayne up against Nazi's... finally a connection between the game and the terrible franchise. The film BloodRayne is based on a sexy, supernatural huntress named BloodRayne (Loken), who is an unholy breed of human and vampire. In a quick take, Boll has confirmed that he has asked star Christian Slater to return in Alone in the Dark II and is awaiting his decision. Come on Slates, what gives?!
    guilliermo del toro needs to smack this guy upside the head with a hellboy dvd and say "this is how its done you talentless douche!".


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    Team Rick MinionZombie's Avatar
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    I really wish someone would assassinate Boll's ego and be done with his idiocy. I simply cannot believe that dickhead gets to keep making utter sh*t movies, meanwhile there's young, fresh talent out there kicking and screaming and desperately trying to get their own film made, scratching together a few penny farthings to make ends meet...

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    Walking Dead coma's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MinionZombie View Post
    I really wish someone would assassinate Boll's ego and be done with his idiocy. I simply cannot believe that dickhead gets to keep making utter sh*t movies, meanwhile there's young, fresh talent out there kicking and screaming and desperately trying to get their own film made, scratching together a few penny farthings to make ends meet...
    Its the way of the world. Its not how good you are, its how good you THINK you are.
    If your humble, no one cares.
    If someone asks you if you are good, you say U am great. They will call your work great sight unseen. I have experimented wuth that and it works
    Up, Up and Away! ARRRRRGHGGGH

    "It's better to regret something you have done, than something you haven't done. By the way, if you see your Mother, tell her I said...
    Satan, Satan, Satan!"
    -The Butthole Surfers

  12. #12
    certified super rad Danny's Avatar
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    good point, i bet uwe bolls a legend in his own mind AKA: a fanbase of 1.


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    Rising Eyebiter's Avatar
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    If he wasn't making some money with these POS films he wouldn't be able to find additional funding. German Investors get tax breaks for putting money into his movies. While they tank in the theaters apparently some people will rent or buy them on DVD.


    Beware the beast, man, for he is the Devil's pawn. Alone among God's primates, he kills for sport or lust or greed. Yea, he will murder his brother to possess his brother's land. Let him not breed in great numbers, for he will make a desert of his home and yours. Shun him, drive him back into his jungle lair, for he is the harbinger of death.
    - 23rd Sacred Scroll, 6th verse

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